


Mute is Moot

by orchidluv82



Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-02
Updated: 2018-01-02
Packaged: 2019-02-27 07:59:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 79,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13243935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orchidluv82/pseuds/orchidluv82
Summary: After going through something traumatic, Bella doesn't speak. She hasn't spoken in years. Upon meeting Edward Cullen, things start to change for Bella.





	1. First Day

No copyright intended. I do not own any recognizable entities herein. This is an AU Twific. I hope you enjoy it.

RATED M FOR MATURE CONTENT. 18 and over ONLY PLEASE.

I read something similar to this once that was unfinished and I really liked how something like this could go. Hopefully you like my take on it.

Today was my first day of school in Forks, Washington. I was living with my father, Charlie for the first time in my life. I was almost eighteen years old, my birthday was only a couple weeks away and I was starting my senior year of high school. The last few weeks were spent adjusting to my new life in the wettest place in the continental U.S. and I was not eager to be the new student. I finished getting ready, putting on my shoes and stuffing a jacket into my backpack in case it rained later. Who was I kidding?

“Bells, hurry up! You’re going to be late.” Charlie shouted up the stairwell, his booming voice traveling through my open bedroom door easily. Glancing around my small, barely decorated bedroom one last time, I shouldered my purple backpack and gripped the strap tightly. I sighed as I closed the door on my way out, ignoring the portrait on the wall of Renee on my way to the stairs.

My footsteps alerted my father to my presence as I made my way down the worn blue painted stairs. He stood at the foot of the stairs waiting for me with an easy smile as he took in my attire. I did the same to him as I approached him slowly, willing myself not to trip. His navy police chief uniform was starched and ironed, buttoned and tucked. His side holster was equipped with his weapon on his left side and his baton was in another holder on his right. The gold colored badge gleamed in the weak sunlight that filtered through the open front door. When I finally made my descent and stood in front of him awkwardly, he pulled me in for a bear hug, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. I pressed my nose into his shoulder and breathed in the Brute aftershave he used every morning whether he shaved or not. This was familiar. I may have only spent a few weeks every summer with him and every other Christmas, but this was better than anything I had lived through my entire life. I wish he had found out sooner. This could have been my life instead. Tight, warm bear hugs, the sharp scent of aftershave, a loving smile.

He pulled back and ran his callused hands down my purple and gray plaid covered arms once before stepping back completely. “You look good, sweetheart.” His eyes roamed over the way my hair was pulled tightly up into a high ponytail, tendrils had escaped but I didn’t bother caring. He tugged on the ends of my hair gently. “Don’t let these kids get to you. They don’t have to understand in order to be nice.”

I nodded uncomfortably before shifting on my feet. The converse squeaked on the floorboards and I glanced down, glaring at them for making the offending noise. The light denim bootcut jeans laid just over the tongue, not too long or too short. I hated when the hems got dirty and torn from walking on them. He turned and gestured to the open doorway, letting me pass before locking up the house. Clearing his throat, Charlie waited until I looked at him from the bottom of the porch steps.

“Here’s a set of house keys. I used to keep one under the porch but now that you’re here, I’d rather not leave the invitation for someone. It’s different when no one’s home if the place got robbed but you’re too precious …” He broke off quickly, apparently uneasy with his rambling and he blushed. I smiled and took the keys from him, fingering the small silver swan that dangled on the keychain. My eyes lit up and I looked back up to my father with a toothy grin. He chuckled and pulled me in for another hug. “It was fitting. Okay, girl. Let’s get this show on the road.”

We loaded up into his police cruiser so he could drop me off at school. I hadn’t been very comfortable with the idea of being driven everywhere by my father, and even less thrilled that he had sold his truck so I had to be seen in the cruiser, but it really wasn’t so bad. I sat in the front seat and was more like his sidekick than a criminal trapped behind the cage in the back seat. Grabbing my bag from the floor in front of me when he pulled up to the curb at school, I set it on my lap and looked at Charlie, my small fingers on the door handle, ready to depart. His dark brown eyes met mine and crinkled in the corners as he smiled at me. It made me nostalgic again, wishing I had spent my formative years with him instead of…

“Here’s a cell phone. And don’t shake your head at me, Bells. You need this. It has unlimited texting and data so feel free to keep me informed about everything. I am encouraging you to. I need to know you’re safe. Most of the kids here are good kids, but there are some yahoos that I don’t want messing with you. I’ll scare them off real good. You just let me know, okay?” Charlie said as he cut off my train of thought. I let him plop the rectangular phone into my hand and stared at it for a long minute, my eyes filling with tears at the fatherly gesture. His protectiveness was still so new to me. I swallowed around the thick lump in my throat and clutched the phone. Charlie watched me carefully with a fondness on his face, his mustache twitching as he tried not to smile too wide. I tried to salvage my small emotional breakdown with a roll of my eyes but he saw through my facade. He always had known me better than anyone else, most likely because I was more like him than anyone cared to guess.

I placed the fingers of my right hand to my lips and smiled as I brought them away and down. He nodded and brushed a strand of hair away from my cheek, tucking it behind my ear. “You’re welcome, sweety. Go on and head to the office. I’ll be here at ten after two to pick you up. Maybe we’ll have pizza for dinner…” My shaking head cut off his offer and I quickly signed out that I wanted to make something. Charlie raised his eyebrow at me and I told him quickly that I wanted to make him chicken alfredo. Both eyebrows raised as he read what I had signed to him and he licked his lips.

“That sounds real good. Much better than pizza!” He said enthusiastically and I shook my shoulders as if I were laughing with a big smile on my face. “Okay, okay really go on now.” He playfully shoved my shoulder as I stepped out of the cruiser and I waved at him as he drove off.

Walking through the parking lot and up the concrete steps to the small side building and glass entry doors that said ‘Main Office’ on them, I struggled to keep my head held high. I was so used to staring at my feet as I walked but I refused to start my new life being the shy, timid girl I had always been. I had a long way to go before I would be over what I had been through, but I could always start small, like Charlie had guided. School may seem like a big step to some people, but to me, it was the smallest step. Warm air fluttered over me from above as I entered the office and headed toward the chest high maroon counter. Metal baskets filled with paperwork, fliers, folders, and leaflets were strewn around the top of the counter. There was a large ficus tree in the corner by a set of uncomfortable looking chairs to the left. I approached the secretary and gave her an envelope and a smile by way of greeting.

“Hello dear. Oh! What’s this?” The elderly gray haired woman opened the envelope as she side eyed me. She read through the contents and her eyes lit with sympathy. No one was to know what was in that envelope except her, the principal, and the guidance counselor. A separate paper was to be copied and given to each of my teachers so there would be no confusion as to why I wasn’t speaking. The school was informed that I did not need to be signed to, as I could hear, but that they would need to brush up on their ASL in order to understand me. Charlie had assured me that this wouldn’t be an issue as the school had previously had a deaf child enrolled a few years ago and all of the teachers had had to learn in order to teach him.

The secretary bustled off to the door furthest to the right of the office and knocked, slipping the envelope into the mail slot on the principal's door. She hurried back over, her large rump making her almost waddle, and settled back into her comfy looking computer chair. She handed me a thick folder that, after a brief glance, I saw had my map, schedule, list of teachers, and some welcome packet that no one ever looked over. I signed ‘Thank you’, earning a returning smile before turning and heading back outside. Forks High was a smattering of four buildings. Maths and Sciences were in one building, Athletics, the cafeteria, and the auditorium was in another, English and History in the third, and the fourth was where the electives were taught like Art, Home Economics and the like. I followed the nicely landscaped sidewalk from the Main Office to the first building I needed. According to my schedule, that I maneuvered while I walked, I would be attending Algebra first period. Mr. Knox, a tall heavy man with graying brown hair, was happy to meet me and was very in depth with American Sign Language, having a niece that was severely hard of hearing as he animatedly explained with both his hands and his mouth, earning himself a few chuckles around the classroom.

Second period brought me to Building Three where I was thrust into the world of Shakespeare for ninety minutes. Thankfully, I didn’t have to leave the building and made my way to History, my last class before lunch. I had received the few odd stares and heard the whispers. Most people didn’t know that I wasn’t actually deaf and didn’t bother to lower their voices at all, earning scowls and glares from the teachers that overheard them, as they were about the only ones who did know my secret. One frizzy haired girl, who sat beside me in English, didn’t bother filtering her tongue and almost earned herself a thwack in the head with my laptop. She should be thankful that I decided my laptop was more worthy than her head. Purposely keeping my eyes on my work on the desk in front of me, I ignored her the best I could, pretending that I was indeed deaf. It was the story we had come up with anyway between the school and Charlie, agreeing that no one would understand or comprehend the real reason why I never spoke. It wasn’t anyone’s business. I refused to let that hurt me or hinder me. Whatever these kids said about me would be on their own conscious if they ever found out that I could actually hear them.

During lunch, I shouldered my backpack and trudged through the slow moving line. I decided I would bring my own lunch from now on. I would rather be sitting under the awning outside the cafeteria, reading my book and munching on carrot sticks, than waiting in this line with all the kids talking about me so rudely. Even if I was deaf, their stares and large way they spoke easily let me read their lips and I narrowed my eyes at a few people. Jessica Stanley, the girl who sat beside me in English, was gushing to her friend about how weird I was. I wasn’t aware I had done anything yet to warrant that label, but this was high school after all. Surprisingly, as I grabbed a tray and filled it with a turkey pita sandwich and a small fruit cup, the blonde she was talking to shushed Jessica and gave her a glare. Jessica waved her hand dismissively and rolled her eyes before running along to find someone else to gossip to. Turning my full attention to the tray of food in front of me, I paid for my lunch and headed toward the doors of the cafeteria. Someone held the door open for me and I barely spared them a glance as I nodded my head. I couldn’t very well sign ‘Thank you’ while I held my tray. No one else joined me outside since it was misting and chilly but the air didn’t bother me. I loved being cold. Under the protective cover of the awning, I ate my lunch at a picnic table and read from my novel. I always kept a book with me wherever I went. Reading was better than dealing with people and deaf, mute, or not, no one bothered someone who was reading.

Most of the time.

I had finished my sandwich and most of my fruit cup, taking a sip of water from my own travel cup, when someone sat down across from me. I raised my eyes to their shoulder, enough to let them know I had acknowledged them, and gave a little wave before going back to my reading. A small, french manicured fingernail tapped on the wood of the picnic table’s top.

Click-click-click

I heaved a big sigh and forked a piece of banana into my mouth, chewing obnoxiously, hoping to deter the person from trying to make conversation. Thankfully the clicking stopped but a small journal was thrust under my nose rudely, now resting on the book I had open already. I huffed and glanced up, clutching the journal instinctively so it wouldn’t fall. I’m pretty sure I swallowed my tongue. The person who sat across from me was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Her long flaxen hair shined, even though the sun had long ago been covered by thick clouds. Large golden eyes surrounded by thick dark lashes stared at me innocently, a hint of a smirk on her plump red lips. Her skin was the lightest shade of cream, not a blemish in sight. I was a pretty girl, but this woman stole my breath with curves to die for and the face of innocent purity that a model would kill for. I blushed at that thought and looked back down at the journal. She had elegant, stroking handwriting. It was the first thing I had noticed. The next thing I noticed was what she wrote.

“I know your secret.”

I gasped and looked up but she was gone. Looking back down at my hands, I realized she had somehow taken the journal with her. I scrambled up to my feet and tripped backwards over the bench seat of the picnic table pinwheeling my arms to keep my balance but it didn’t help. I fell down onto my ass in the thick grass. Thankfully no one was out here to see that. Wasting no time in picking myself back up, I wiped my butt off with my palms and gathered my tray and trash as I kept darting my eyes around, looking for the golden haired beauty. The words on the white lined page swirled around and around in my head. She knew. Someone knew my secret. How did she find out and why would she tell me about it? Would she become my new bully? Use my secrets against me the way they had? Images of my old bullies rose unbidden in my head. Or worse, become the new tormentor? I wasn’t sure I could handle another tormentor. Charlie and Jake had fought too hard to bring me back from the brink for me to get shoved back down. I had to tell Charlie.

I tossed my trash into a bin on my way back through the cafeteria and placed the tray on the counter as I walked quickly toward the auditorium down the hall. Pulling my cell phone from the side pocket in my backpack, I powered it on and waited impatiently for everything to load. Why couldn’t Charlie just have gotten me a tiny little flip phone? These new fangled things take forever to load and this was important! Just as I was typing out my text to my father, I felt a presence beside me, the person’s shoulder was so close their shirt was rubbing against mine with each breath. I slowly closed my phone using the power button so what I was writing couldn’t be read and dropped my hand to my side as I looked up to my left.

How many times would my breath leave me today? This man was more gorgeous than the woman by far. Soft looking creamy white skin, dancing golden eyes surrounded in thicker lashes than even the woman who had sat with me at lunch, a long straight nose, trim clean shaven jaw. I swooned. His red gold hair was artfully spastic, sticking up and out as if he had been running his fingers through it all day. Fingers, I noticed as he did indeed run them through his hair, were long and perfect for playing the piano. The corner of his mouth hitched up in a crooked type of smile, revealing straight white teeth under full kissable lips. My eyes shot to the floor in embarrassment. Were my hormones just late to the game? I had never been so blatant with my staring or so descriptive about people before in my life.

I signed that I was sorry and pushed off the wall I was leaning against, ready to dart into the nearest restroom. I still had to message Charlie. A cool hand touched my forearm and I turned my face to the handsome man attached to it. What he did next made my jaw drop.

He started signing, almost too fast for me to comprehend. “I’m sorry for my sister, Rosalie. She doesn’t know boundaries and my other sister tried to stop her but she was determined to make a friend in you. I know it seems as if she is going about it the wrong way but she didn’t want you to freak out if she just started talking to you and you ignored her because everyone here thinks you’re deaf. She also didn’t want you to end up responding to her voice and then everyone here would know you’re not deaf. I’m rambling. I’ll stop rambling now.” His face was so expressive as he signed and I breathed a laugh, hitching my shoulders and tossing my head back. I laid a hand on his forearm and smiled at him, my eyes dancing. His nervousness was endearing.

I signed back at him, just as animated. It had been such a long time since I had been able to sign with someone who knew the language so well. Charlie learned ASL but he wasn’t very good at it and while Jake tried to learn, he was struggling more than Charlie. They knew my secrets so they usually spoke while I signed or wrote. I almost collapsed in relief that Rosalie didn’t know my actual secrets. This little Forks High secret was nothing compared to what I was running away from. “She really should have just said that. She disappeared so fast that I was sure I was in for some massive bullying later.” I signed to him, my facial expression depicting how frightened that thought made me. His arm moved forward before it fell back to his side and I was sure he was about to comfort me. It was a shame he didn’t. I probably would have embarrassed myself further by actually cuddling into him and sniffing him. I bet he smelled heavenly.

“She really didn’t mean to scare you. She’s a bit awkward sometimes. You would be her first friend here.” He signed at me, huffing a bit in exasperation and I wondered at why I would only be her first. I didn’t think on it long as he changed the subject.

“I’m Edward, by the way. Edward Cullen. You’re Bella?” He signed, as he stepped a little closer. I felt at ease with him in a way I’d never felt at ease with anyone else.

I nodded. “Yes, Bella is what I prefer to be called. Isabella Swan at your service.” I rolled my eyes at myself and made a face. “Sorry, I’m a little bit of a dork.”

The smile that crossed Edward’s face was so large that I smiled with him. “I think you’re adorable.” He signed and I blushed. I signed ‘Thank you’ then started to back away. The bell would be ringing for the next period I was sure and I had to go to Building Four for Art class. His eyes dimmed and his beautiful smile faded as he saw me retreat.

I was quick to reassure him. “I just have to get to Art. Maybe we can meet up after school before my dad picks me up?” I knew I was being a bit brazen by asking, he was only apologizing for his sister’s actions earlier after all.

Edward’s POV

I got my first glimpse of Isabella Swan through the eyes of Mindy, the school’s secretary. Mindy was a bit of a busy body at Fork’s High, always needing to be in everyone’s business. However, when it came to serious things, she was closed-mouthed and respectful. She always wore her dark gray hair in tiny curls tight to her scalp and kept thick clear rimmed glasses tied around her neck on a bright pink shoestring. The elderly lady’s mind was filled with sympathetic thoughts over the new girl’s ordeal. The paperwork she read through while Isabella stood in front of her didn’t give me much to go on. Only that she had been through a very traumatic, life threatening experience that rendered her mute. The girl didn’t speak. Ever. She hadn’t spoken in almost eight years. I heard in Mindy’s mind that she would be sending out a mass email to the staff to have them brush up on their American Sign Language so they could accommodate Isabella thoroughly to help ease her transition during her time here in her new school. Once the secretary had given the principal the envelope filled with Isabella’s information, I took the time to study the beautiful brunette. And beautiful she is.

Long mahogany hair with caramel blonde streaks was pulled high into a ponytail, the ends brushing the middle of her shoulder blades. The flannel shirt she wore in lavender and charcoal complimented her creamy complexion very well and was buttoned up to just under her bust. She wore a light tan lace camisole underneath the button up shirt. A long silver chain hung around her neck, the emblem at the end was tucked between two small perky breasts so I couldn’t tell what the trinket was. I tore my mental eyes from Isabella’s breasts in time to see her smile at Mindy. Her soft looking lips were slightly plump, the top one a little larger than the bottom one. Her heart shaped face was angular but not in a sickly way. She looked refined with her high cheekbones and sharp chin. Wide innocent eyes almost glowed a golden brown, such a bright and beautiful color surrounded by thick dark lashes. A smattering of freckles dotted the bridge of her nose and under her eyes. Her small frame was held confidently as if she knew she was beautiful but the look in her eyes told me that the confidence was false. She was unsure of her time here.

I followed Isabella through the eyes of our fellow classmates, both relishing and hating the way the boy’s eyes would linger on her petite backside. I did enjoy the way her denim jeans hugged her rounded hips though. I watched and listened as she endured Jessica’s petty words. The males closest to her were imagining her in less than appropriate ways and I found myself feeling disgusted with them, though I should feel disgusted with myself as well for my own secondhand gawking. That brought me up short as I had never cared about what little boys thought of the little girls around me as they grew up. Each high school was the same, every pubescent boy thought terrible, sexual thoughts about the girl they were next to. The thoughts were always outrageous too, being as the only experience they usually had was in their bedroom surfing youporn. The girls didn’t seem to really care. Some were a little jealous but Isabella had a flaw that they did not. She was deaf...or so they thought...so no boy would want to date her more than they would want to date the next Suzy Q. I quickly got out of the surrounding minds and searched for the brunette’s thoughts.

Being in the class next to hers, it was easy to tap into her mental signature and I laughed not so silently as ‘Bella’ - as she liked to be called I had learned - thought about smacking Jessica upside the head with her laptop. A sharp look from the teacher had me clearing my throat and better pretending to pay attention. He asked me a question about the coursework and I simply plucked the answer from his head, angering him further in the process.

At lunch, I sat with my siblings at the corner of the cafeteria, closest to the doors leading outside to the picnic tables. Jasper and Emmett had graduated last year, leaving Rosalie, Alice, and myself as seniors. This would be the last year we would be in Forks, Washington. The story so far was that Jasper and Emmett had gone East to college and once we graduated in June with our class, the three of us ‘kids’ would be joining them. Carlisle and Esme would of course need to follow their children, though Esme would put up a ‘fight’ about wanting to grow old in the house she loved so much. Unfortunately for her, there would be no growing old...for any of us. Rosalie huffed as she sat down beside me, flattening her ruffled blue jersey shirt and I looked at her questioningly. Her mind was curiously blank and Alice’s eyes were glazed. I tried peeking into her head but all I saw was darkness. She was purposely blocking me, the little turd.

“I tried to get her attention by holding the door but she didn’t even look up at me.” Rosalie huffed again as she tossed her hair over her shoulder. It was odd to me that though the venom is supposed to make a vampire perfect and Rosalie is as close to perfect as even a vampire can get, it did not take away her slight lisp. Alice sat straighter in her chair and I caught the glimpse of a vision before she spoke.

“Just go speak to her now. Use the journal. It’ll work.” She spoke low and quick as she played with her fruit cup before faking a sip of water. Her wide golden eyes darted around wildly and I wondered what she had up her sleeve. Though she wasn’t exactly wearing sleeves because even though it was only reaching mid-forties this week, Alice thought it would not be conspicuous if she wore a strapless thigh length dress.

That sentence right there let me know that these two had been plotting. I caught the word ‘mate’ in Rosalie’s mind and perked up. “Mate?” I asked her, hoping to release a flood of thoughts. Unfortunately, Rosalie’s mind was like a steel door. When she didn’t want you inside it, she could shut it and lock you out. No amount of concentration would let me inside her head. She shot me a glare and smoothed her palms down her thick thighs as if in preparation of something big.

Alice smiled a little too brightly as Rosalie stood and sashayed out the cafeteria door holding a small black journal in her hand. I scowled at my small friend as she continued pretending to eat. I jabbed a strawberry with my fork and pretended to stick it in my mouth, acting out the chewing and swallowing before hiding the strawberry in a napkin where no one would see.

“What is going on? Why is Rosalie out there with Isabella?” I asked sharply.

Alice tutted. “You’d better get used to calling her Bella. She will tear you a new one if you call her by her full name.” She warned me as she kept her eyes on her food, her eyebrows raised. I saw a glimpse of a vision of me speaking with Bella in the auditorium.

“Is that today?” I asked, noticing that her shirt was the same. Though I was sure she didn’t own an endless supply of clothing as we did, it didn’t necessarily have to be a vision from today. Alice nodded, however, so I sat back in my chair and smiled. I would get to speak with the new girl. Her mind had captured my attention all morning so far. Her quick and deep thinking had me intrigued and her carefully evaded thoughts about her life had me wanting to delve into her whole life to know her. I was broken out of my thoughts of Bella when she herself strode quickly through the cafeteria as if she were on a mission. It was then that I noticed Rosalie was sitting beside me again, her long legs crossed at the knees, resting her heel clad feet one on top of the other.

“What did you do?” I asked as I leaned forward on the table, trying my damndest to enter her mind but to no avail.

Rosalie rolled her golden eyes at me. “I did what I planned to do.” She said shortly.

As I was about to ask her to elaborate, Alice interrupted, speaking quickly. “You did great, everything is going to plan. Edward move! Go to the auditorium already! Tell her Rose just wants to be her friend. Improvise.” She waved me away and I walked, uncertain, toward the auditorium. I fidgeted with the untucked hem of my white button down tee, absently tracing the thin brown lines on the fabric. Alice had chosen this preppy plaid shirt, paired with a relaxed fit dark blue denim jeans and brown work boots. I’d never worn work boots to school before but she had rolled her pretty little eyes and told me never to doubt her. I wondered now if this outfit made me more approachable or not. I couldn’t see how either way, though.

Bella’s thoughts warned me that she was about to message Charlie about the odd encounter she had with my sister so I found my ‘intervening in’. She was extremely nervous and worried that Rosalie would end up being a bully and I wondered what it was that Rosalie said to her. Bella wasn’t remembering that part of the conversation though, she was too focused on trying to get her phone to load quicker. As I approached her, I watched as she leaned her back against the wall by the auditorium doors and started typing on her Samsung. It looked brand new and caught her thoughts about Charlie not buying her something worse. I stood, resting my back against the wall as well, letting my upper arm barely brush against her shoulder. She was very short compared to my six foot one. Her scent was lovely as she blushed, realizing someone was next to her. She smelled like a mix of fresh sliced strawberries and a hint of vanilla.

She signed that she was sorry and I wondered what she could possibly be sorry for. I was the one who had come to stand next to her. I touched her arm as she tried to make an escape. I had to let her know that Rosalie meant no harm. The tenor of her thoughts almost had me laughing out loud a couple of times. Once when she noticed my piano playing fingers, another when she thought of me through her own eyes, and again at her expression when I was signing to her so fluently.

Our conversation seemed to go fairly well, though she was pretty peeved at the way Rosalie had introduced herself...Or rather...didn’t. I was upset with Rosalie for scaring her into thinking she may have a bully on her hands. Bella didn’t seem to need that sort of drama in her life. I would be her biggest protector.

I would? Hmm. I like the thought of that.

She had looked so scared that I had almost reached out to pull her into my chest but thought better of it. I was a stranger, she didn’t know me and was most likely leery of me. Her thoughts, however, let me know that my comfort would have been more than welcome. My chest swelled and I felt smug. She was adorable, being embarrassed of her own thoughts, the way her blush would spread across her cheeks and down her chest. I wondered idly if that blush covered her breasts and ribs as well. I really wanted to find out.

That irked me because I had never had thoughts like this about a woman before.

I was confused when she started backing away from me. We had been standing fairly close the entire conversation and though, yes she was correct that the bell would ring any moment, I wondered if maybe she had some sort of self preservation kick in the ass. I really hoped not because for some reason, this beautiful girl had drawn me in with her smiles and expressive features. Her tiny hands darted around quickly as she signed to me and her lips and eyes would make up the cutest faces, her hair swinging around her shoulders as she ‘spoke’.

I saw in her thoughts how my face fell when she backed away from me. I tried like hell to contain my happiness when she offered to meet up with me after school. I wasn’t sure I should let Charlie see her with me just yet though. Carlisle and he got along great, being the Chief of Police and the Chief of Surgery, they interacted a lot and Carlisle often join him to drink a beer with him after a long or particularly grueling shift. But would he really want his daughter hanging around with me? With any male, for that matter? I realized I hadn’t answered her yet and she looked disappointed as she turned away. I decided that Chief Swan would just have to deal with it.

I moved in front of her smoothly and smiled brightly, signing for show, as the auditorium was starting to fill with the choir, but leaning down to murmur in her ear. “I would love to meet up with you after school, Bella.”

My grin was a mile wide as I left her standing in the auditorium, thoughts racing and heart pounding in her chest. I had never had this sort of interaction with a female before and for some reason, I wanted Bella to be my everything. That thought gave me pause and I made a mental note to talk to Carlisle or Esme after I got home.


	2. Billy's House

Oh my God! Oh my God!

Those were the only coherent thoughts running through my mind at that exact moment. He spoke directly into my ear, his breath fanning across my face and into my nose as he did so. I was rendered completely stunned! His voice was a liquid velvet tenor, surrounding my eardrums and caressing them like silky feathers. The scent of his breath was like the most delicious chocolate from Mexico or the Peking Duck in China. I had never had either but I imagined they would make me want to fall to the floor in a puddle of goo just like Edward Cullen’s breath did.

Standing there slack jawed like a loon, I watched him retreat with a cocky swagger as if he knew exactly what he’d just done to me and I scowled to myself before looking around. I was acting like any other teeny-bopping lovesick girl. The auditorium was filling up with the school’s choir and I had to get to class. I picked up my backpack, which I had placed on the floor by my feet at some point, and headed out of the building for Art. I kept my head high as I traversed from Building Two to Building Four. I admired the Goatsbeard, Lupine, and Lewisia as I walked down the sidewalk. The bright colors really brought some life to the otherwise green and brown landscapes that was known for the Pacific Northwest.

Shoving the heavy metal door open with my shoulder and letting it slam behind me, I easily found my classroom and silently introduced myself to the class. None of the kids understood what I signed but the teacher helpfully told them my name and that I preferred Bella. Usually, I hated having to stand at the front of a class and introduce myself but the art teacher, Ms. Hanscome, reminded me of my mother in the way that she dressed eclectically and seemed to talk with her hands whether she was signing or not.

I shook myself away from thoughts of my mother. Remembering her was too hard and I didn’t need to break down at school. Art class went by quickly enough with orders to buy a portfolio and start sketching things around us that meant something meaningful. I already knew the first few things that would go into the portfolio and was eager to finish school so that I could have Charlie drive me to Port Angeles this evening. I wanted to buy the portfolio tonight and get started, though we weren’t due back for Art class for another week. That was the good thing about the electives here. The classes were once weekly unless you signed up for extra because you had a free period.

My last class of the day found me in Building One, enduring Biology III. I had done the coursework at my online school last year so this would end up being a drag of a class. I did notice that a tiny girl in a strapless dress sat next to me trying to get my attention throughout the whole of the class but I tactfully ignored her. She huffed a few times and tapped her tiny red heeled toes on the faded linoleum of the classroom, but I was supposed to be deaf, so I didn’t acknowledge her little movements at all and kept my eyes on my work and my mind on Edward Cullen.

Snatching my bag up a few seconds before the final bell rang, I darted out of the classroom and headed straight for the Main Office where I handed my filled out paperwork and teacher’s signatures to the secretary. She smiled brightly when she saw me and I waved quickly before heading back out into the misting rain to wait for Charlie. School for the seniors was always released at one forty five so I had a good twenty five minutes before Charlie would be here for me. His shift ended at two p.m. most days, leaving his deputies to work the afternoon and evening shifts. That made it especially convenient, since I wanted him to drive me an hour each way tonight for my portfolio.

I leaned my hip on the metal pipe banister outside of the Main Office building at the foot of the concrete steps and people watched. I wondered if Edward was going to meet me over here or if I should head out to the student parking lot to search for him. I wasn’t left pondering for long when I felt his presence beside me. My eyes found his and I smiled widely before my smile faded away awkwardly.

Beside him were Rosalie and the tiny girl in the strapless dress. Rosalie was, of course, the picture of perfection in her tight team jersey shirt and light blue denim skinny jeans paired with navy blue heels. Her golden hair fell down over her shoulders artfully and I tucked a strand of my own hair behind my ear as I studied her. Looking at the tiny girl, I gave a little wave as I looked her over. Her short black hair was shaved short in the back and left long on the top. She had it spiked up asymmetrically and a small bobby pin with a sparkling butterfly was clipped to the side of her head. The red strapless dress she wore hugged her tiny curves and flowed outward around her hips, stopping about mid-thigh and I almost collapsed with want.

That dress was one I had been searching for for months on eBay. The one this girl wore had to be the real deal because all of the ones on eBay that were still out of my price range still had flaws whereas this dress had none. The red was brilliant and the stitching was perfect. The small flowers that dotted the hem of her dress stood out fantastically in bright yellows and oranges. The suede red heels she wore made her stand a few inches taller, making her might height but I could tell that she was definitely a short person.

“Hi, I’m Alice!” The small girl spoke with a high pitched twinkling voice and I was relieved that she didn’t seem offended that I’d blown her off in Bio. Edward signed her name for me, remembering that I was supposed to be deaf at school and I waved again and relaxed when Edward saddled up next to me and let his arm touch my shoulder. I was so short next to him that I almost cricked my neck to look up at him before Rosalie stole my attention.

“I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself earlier, Bella. My name’s Rosalie. I hope I didn’t bother you too much at lunch.” Rosalie said and signed. Her voice was soft and timid as if she were afraid I would yell at her or shun her. Who would shun this beautiful woman? I wondered if that were why she had no other friends. Maybe people were so intimidated by her looks that they avoided her altogether, never giving her a chance to become friends.

“Hello, it’s nice to meet you both.” I signed to the two girls. Alice beamed and signed that she wanted to talk to me in class but I seemed so into the coursework and she was sorry that she tried to bother me. I waved her off with a smile, feeling awkward and a little bad that I had ignored her.

Edward touched my arm and I jumped, slightly startled. He smiled apologetically before he started signing. I was too mesmerized by the fluidity of his long fingers and hand gestures to really pay attention to what he was saying so when his hands dropped and Alice’s tinkling laughter filled the air, I looked up at Edward’s face. I felt so stupid and blushed crimson.

“I was only asking if you’d like to spend some time at our house this weekend. I’ve got Art class on Thursdays and I know we will be working on portfolios this year. There are some wonderful nature shots I could show you, if you’d like.”

I was glad that he’d spoken this time as well as signed because I was still lost in my own thoughts about his beautiful hands. I could listen to his voice all day long. All night too. I started to daydream about the different volumes and tones his voice would take if he were angry, aroused, ecstatic. I mentally slapped myself as I continued to blush and I nodded.

“I don’t have a car right now so I’ll have to see if Charlie will drop me off.” I signed back to him.

Alice pushed her way in front of Edward and I stepped back to give her room, a little put off with her forcefulness but I let it slide when I saw the eager look on her cute little face. “We can pick you up if you don’t have plans! Everyone knows where the Chief lives and we can bring you home later. Unless of course, you want to spend the night! I would love to have a slumber party.” Her words were so fast that I was glad she had signed as well, just as fluently as Edward had.

“I’m not so sure about spending the night. I think my dad has plans this weekend but if you’d like to pick me up, I’m okay with that.” I signed to them, giving them both large smiles. It was so nice that I made a few friends my first day of school.

Their matching golden eyes and the fact that Edward had said ‘our house’ made me think they had to be family, but they looked nothing alike. I remembered then that Edward had said Rosalie was his sister and then he had mentioned his ‘other sister’ so I supposed that was who Alice was. Still, aside from the eyes, creamy skin, and their insane beauty, there were no other similarities that I could see. Maybe they wore colored contacts. I loved wearing colored contacts but I had never worn gold before. I noticed Edward looking at my with a strange expression on his face but he smoothed it out quickly and it made me wonder if I’d imagined it.

Alice was jumping up and down on the balls of her feet, causing her dress to poof out slightly with each small move. I smiled at her and saw Charlie’s cruiser pull into the lot. He eyed the kids I was standing with and put the car into park next to the curb in front of the steps of the Main Office. I smiled at him and waved excitedly before turning to my new friends.

“I’ve got to go but here.” I pulled out a small notepad from the front pocket of my backpack and wrote down my cell phone number, handing it to Rosalie. I would have handed it directly to Edward but I didn’t need any questions from Charlie just yet. I needed time to figure out why this boy had captured my utmost attention so quickly. I had never been one to swoon over boys before.

Edward smiled down at me before stepping away a half of a step. “I will message you later, Bella. It was nice to meet you.” The crooked smile he gave me had me widening my eyes and shifting on my feet. How can that smile make my knees go weak like that?

“I’ll text you tonight, Bella. Thank you.” Rosalie signed, her face open and happy.

Alice was still bouncing on her feet and she came up and wrapped me in her arms tightly. She was surprisingly strong for someone so small but I hugged her back just the same. “I can’t wait to see you again!” She signed and spoke excitedly. She seemed to have a lot of pep to her. I hoped I could handle her.

Edward snickered behind his hand and I shot him a side smile before turning and shouldering my backpack. The three of them waved as I got into the cruiser with my dad and I waved back, willing Charlie to leave before he started his inquisition. I had drawn too much attention to myself by standing with three beautiful people and my face was as red as an apple.

The smell of the cruiser made me relax as I settled into the passenger seat. While Charlie waited in the line of cars of students trying to leave the school, I touched his arm. He hadn’t stopped smiling since he pulled up to the school. When I had his attention I started signing.

“Do you mind if we go to Port Angeles tonight? I need a portfolio for Art class. I can make the alfredo after we get back.”

Charlie chuckled at my excited expression and eager hands. “Sure, kiddo. Can I change first or is this a job for the Chief of Police?” He asked me as he hovered his finger over the switch to the cruiser’s sirens. I cringed dramatically and he let out a booming laugh and pulled out of the parking lot, headed for home.

I didn’t bother signing to Charlie while he drove, that was just dangerous, but riding with him was never awkward as he and I either sat comfortably in silence or he filled the silence with inane chatter. I was content with whichever he chose and today he chose silence. I was actually very surprised about that since he’d seen me talking to not only two girls but also a boy! I was sure I would be getting the Spanish Inquisition the second I got into the car but he was proving to be more subdued than I realized.

I supposed all he really wanted was for me to make friends, regardless of their sex.

While Charlie was changing from his uniform into something more outing appropriate, I dug through my backpack for my phone, wallet, and house keys. Finding them and placing them in a small Marvel handbag, I changed my clothes from my school clothes to my own outing appropriate clothing. Slipping on a pair of retro plastic glasses and black maryjane shoes over lined black stockings, I looked in the mirror. The maryjanes completed my Rockabilly look perfectly but I really wanted a pair of chunky heeled booties. I wouldn’t submit Charlie to my shopping addiction though. I would have to find someone else to go with me.

My black and lavender bowknot panel flare swing dress fitted my curves beautifully. The hem flared out at my knees with a fluffy lace tulle underneath to keep the bounce. A stripe of lavender graced the skirt of the dress from hip to hem. The sleeves went down to my elbows and the large lavender bow pressed against my chest, forming cleavage that otherwise isn’t there. I pushed the pendant of my necklace down between my breasts as I examined my hair. The tendrils that had climbed out of the elastic had curled naturally and looked cute so I left my head the way it was.

Skipping down the steps carefully, I skid off of the bottom step and gasped, preparing myself for a fall, but Charlie’s large warm hand caught my elbow. He chuckled then it cut off with a choke as he took in my dress. I shook my shoulders as if I were laughing at him and straightened my dress dramatically.

“Don’t I look good?” I asked at length with my hands, my eyes widened in mock innocence.

Stuttering for a moment, Charlie cleared his throat. “Sure, sweetheart. You look great.” His voice sounded strained and I breathed a laugh before looping my arm through his. His green and black flannel button down scratched at my smooth skin and I relished in the feeling. I leaned over and sniffed his shoulder as he walked me out the front door and down the steps toward the cruiser.

“Did you just sniff me?” He asked warily with a twitch to his mustache. I just grinned at him and nodded my head. “You’re a weird child.”

I nodded again and smiled wider as he helped me into the passenger seat like a true gentleman. My dad is such a sweety.

The drive to Port Angeles and back was quick and painless. I got my new portfolio and I was very happy with what I picked out. The large black binder with extra slots for pencils and paper had white swirling designs on the front cover. I also picked up an extra packet of sketch paper and charcoal pencils. I hated sketching with regular pencils. I could never get the shading exactly how I wanted it with a plain ol’ number two.

Back at the house, Charlie chopped up the baked chicken while I simmered the noodles and sauce together. I added my own spices along with extra heavy cream and butter. The canned alfredo just didn’t cut it. After tossing everything together and heating through the chicken once more, we enjoyed a caesar salad before digging into the entree. There was still over half a pot of food left so Charlie offered to take it to La Push for Billy and Jacob. I agreed so that’s what I was doing now - maneuvering a large overly warm Tupperware of chicken alfredo on my lap as Charlie tried to take the road as smoothly as possible. The One-oh-One really needed some road work after you passed the La Push line because the potholes could probably suck me into the earth.

Jake had the door opened to the small red paneled house before Charlie had even parked his cruiser and swung open my door before I had unbuckled. He snatched the food out of my hands and at first I thought he was going to make a run for it, with the eager look on his face, but instead he shoved the Tupperware unceremoniously into Charlie’s not-so-waiting hands. My dad grunted a hello and skulked off to find Billy, probably to tell him how rude his son was being while I was hauled out of the car and swept up into a huge bear hug.

Jacob Black is my best friend. His long black hair was hanging loose and I tugged on it roughly while he swung me around and I held my glasses to my face. He dropped me quickly and looked shocked until he saw how bright my eyes were and the smile on my face. He leaned down and quickly pecked my lips before making a show of checking me out, his eyes lingering on my cleavage. I smacked his arm and rolled my eyes.

“You look fantastic, Bells. I missed this look on you. You always could pull it off.” He complimented as he grabbed my hand and started walking me toward the house and up Billy’s ramp. I usually dressed normal for school and to lounge around at home but when I was going anywhere...And I mean anywhere...I sported my Rockabilly Nerd look hard. Jake had been the one to get me into comic everything and I had adopted the Rockabilly look after a particularly grueling time. I had wanted to change everything about myself so when I turned up five years ago wearing a pin-up polka dot dress with my hair in victory rolls and large curls, Jake’s tongue had lolled out of his head even at eleven years old. At thirteen, I had developed more than just a pancake bust and when the pre-pubescent Jake had caught sight of me in that getup, he wouldn’t stop following me around until I turned and punched him in the nose for pinching my ass.

I signed ‘Thank you’ to my best friend and made a show of twirling around when we got into the kitchen where Charlie was dishing up large helpings of my chicken alfredo for both of the natives. Billy’s eyes popped out of his head when he saw me before he set his features to stern.

Signing as he spoke in a rough, deep voice, “Are you sure you need to be walking around like that, young lady?”

I rolled my eyes as I model walked up to him, twirling again before bending at the waist and giving his cheek a sloppy kiss. Billy’s mock sternness fell quickly as he guffawed and grasped my hands in his large callused weathered one.

“You look beautiful, Bells. Some boy is gonna snatch you up before you know it.” Billy said, a little too loudly for my liking.

Jake groaned and protested while Charlie looked like he might faint. My mind immediately traveled to Edward. His light creamy features and red-gold hair in sexy disarray. I blushed and pulled away from Billy, grabbing the filled plates from a stunned stupid Charlie and setting them on the kitchen table. The look on Charlie’s face was almost as if he’d never put that thought together before where I was concerned. Considering I had never been interested in boys, I couldn’t blame him.

“Eat your food before it gets cold….Or I spit in it.” I pretended to hock up a loogie and pursed my lips as if I were going to actually spit. Jake made a face and sat down, shoving me to the side lightly and I breathed a laugh before ruffling his hair, making him grumble with his full mouth. Billy rolled up to the table and locked his wheelchair, digging into the food with gusto. I was happy we could do this for them.

Since Sarah Black passed away from the car accident that rendered Billy paralyzed from the waist down, the Black boys hadn’t had much luck in life. Billy and Sarah’s twin daughters, Rebecca and Rachel had taken off the moment they turned sixteen, leaving their nine year old brother to care for a disabled, diabetic father all by himself. The Chief of the Quileute Tribe hadn’t been completely alone as the entire community pulled together to help him and his small son with the loss of their matriarch, but times had still been hard for them.

Every summer and Christmas that I spent with Charlie, I made casseroles galore for the Black boys so they could freeze them and have food for a while. They had always raved about my cooking and baking so I made sure to give them all I could. Whenever Charlie and I had leftovers - and we did often since I was inept at cooking for only two people - we would truck them over to La Push unannounced. I wouldn’t have to make quite so many casseroles now that I was a permanent fixture in Forks. I could simply bring what I made that night or the following weekend.

A knock at the door after dishes were done had Billy freezing a moment before trying to act casual. It didn’t seem as if Charlie or Jake noticed the pause, but I did. He dismissed Jacob’s offer to get the door and rolled as nonchalantly as he could away from the kitchen table and through the small entryway to the front door. I pretended to be engrossed in whatever Jake was saying to me as I positioned myself discreetly against the living room wall, directly in line with the front door. Billy opened the door and a huge hulking native man stood imposingly, arms crossed over his chest and his thick dark brows furrowed. He glared at Billy...or maybe that was just his face...before he glanced behind him once. Meeting Billy’s eyes again he said two words that sent chills down my spine for no apparent reason.

“They’re back.”

Billy had wheeled himself out of the house and onto the ramp to speak with the large stranger in private after he caught me staring from his peripherals. I sighed, feeling deflated. I liked good gossip and that guy looked angry about something.

“Hey Jake.” I signed to my friend, getting his attention by waving one of my hands in his face as I jerked the ‘J’ sign by my hip while wearing a goofy face. It had been a joke as we grew closer each summer that since Jake followed me around like a puppy dog, his name should loosely mean dog so I would jerk the first initial of his name down by my hip with my tongue hanging out of my mouth like a panting dog. The joke had stuck all these years.

“Geez Bells. Am I ever going to live that down?” Jake asked me exasperatedly as he rolled his big brown eyes and crossed his arms in front of his growing chest.

I shook my head and smiled widely at him. “Who was that at the door?” I signed impatiently.

Jake huffed and waved his arm for me to follow him as he headed toward his bedroom. “We’re gonna have to sign for this. I don’t want my dad overhearing. He gets pretty defensive...” He said in a low voice. His usually happy eyes had gone hard and he fidgeted with his fingers as he laid them in his lap. He looked deep in thought. I sat next to him on his tiny twin bed that was stuffed in his tiny closet sized room. Dirty clothes littered the floor and half naked women posed on beaches in bikinis all over his walls.

I rolled my wrist in a ‘get on with it’ motion.

Using his clumsy large hands, he started to sign slowly so he wouldn’t mess up. “That was Sam Uley. He used to be a good kid but after weeks of starting fights in school, one night he had a fight with his girlfriend and he disappeared. No one could find him for over two weeks. When he came back he looked like he had been doing steroids or something. He was angry all the time. Paul Lahote disappeared next. Missed school for a whole week before he showed up looking like Sam. Jared Cameron and Embry were next.”

I put up my hand to stop him. “Embry Call? As in your best friend?” I asked, my face incredulous.

Jake nodded solemnly. “He’s not anymore.” He whispered sadly.

I clucked my tongue and leaned my shoulder into Jake’s and he lifted his arm to let me snuggle into him. I comforted him the best I could and laid my small hand on his knee. I shook my head against his chest. I felt so bad for Jake right now. Losing his best friend like that? Embry and Jake had been inseparable since they were in diapers. Quil was a year younger than them both but when Joy Ateara had taken over the grocery store for her deceased husband, Sarah Black had started babysitting Quil and the three boys became the Three Amigos. You rarely saw one without the other two being close by.

“I’m sorry Jake. That royally sucks.” I stuck my tongue out and raspberried to show my distaste for the situation.

“Yeah it does.” He said before he started signing again. “Anyway, Sam took point with all these guys and is the leader of their little group. They all look like they went through some insane growth spurt so it doesn’t make sense that they would be on steroids but their muscles beg to differ.” He pouted.

I leaned away from Jake and made a show of looking him up and down, similar to how he had checked me out when I first got here. I took my glasses off my face slowly and grabbed the hem of my dress to exaggeratedly wipe the plastic lenses off before I put them back on and checked him out again.

The boy was tall. In just the few weeks I’ve been living back in Forks, this sixteen year old boy had started to look like a man. Rounded biceps peeked out from the hems of his tee shirts, thighs that grew double in size of both mine put together. He always wore a shirt so I couldn’t be positive but I was pretty sure he had abs now. When I first got here in the middle of August, Jake had only been five foot six to my five foot three. Now he stood at least a head taller than me, somewhere around five foot eleven.

Jake chuckled and brought me back into his side while he ruffled my ponytail, loosening more tendrils from the band. I smacked his thigh playfully and blew air up my face so it hit him in his.

“Trust me Jake, you’re getting buff yourself. Are you sure you’re not doing steroids? They’re not good for you, you know. Make things shrink where others grow.” I chuckled silently as he gawked at me wide eyed.

“I’m not sure if I should disprove your point or not!” He stated loudly, offended.

I jumped away from him and held my hand up, almost tripping on some of the laundry on the floor, my face lit up with a large grin. “No!” I signed to him. “No, no no!”

Jake stood and stalked me the mere two feet apart we stood. He reached for his buckle on his jeans slowly and I started waving my hands around like a maniac as I shook my head back and forth. This was one of those moments where I wish I dared to use my voice. I missed screeching and playing around with Jake. He used to tickle me just to hear me laugh but he hadn’t attempted that since I turned fifteen and the worst had happened to me. Continuing to wave my hands around, I slid to the side and scrambled onto his small bed but the sheets were clumped and messy and wrapped around my shoes as I tried to climb off the other side, closest to the bedroom door. Jake was laughing up a storm, watching me get more and more tangled and grabbed my foot.

A squeal slipped out of my mouth and Jake froze, his hand wrapped around my ankle.

My chest rose and fell heavily from the panting breaths I had taken to climb over and around his messy room and from the excitement of actually playing around with Jake like we were just a couple of rowdy kids. My upper body was off of the bed, my torso twisted to face the ceiling and I held myself up with my left hand on the floor. My hips and legs were tangled in Jake’s sheet as he stood over me, eyes wide with shock with his hand still on my ankle.

The squeak of Billy’s wheelchair alerted us to the presence of our fathers and I looked up and back to see an upside down Billy and Charlie in the doorway. Looking back to Jake I wriggled the fingers of my right hand toward him and he took the hint, grasping my hand and pulling me upright, releasing me from the confines of his booby trap. Once I was steadily on two feet, Charlie pushed passed Billy’s chair and squeezed himself into Jake’s small room to cup my face between his hands. My eyes were as wide as saucers when I saw there were tears in his.

“Bells? Are you okay?” My dad’s voice shook and it made me sad to realize that my not speaking has reduced him to this all because I accidentally squealed. I nodded my head. Charlie’s fingers clutched my head tighter and he dared a look at Jake. I followed his eyes with my own, unable to turn my head, thankfully Jake was in my line of vision just to Charlie’s right. “What happened?” He asked gruffly.

Jake stuttered over his words with his shock. I hoped to God he wouldn’t tell him why I was trying to get away from him. That would be embarrassing. “We were messing around...Not like...Just talking and...I was going to pretend to take...tickle her. She went to get away from me and I grabbed her ankle so she wouldn’t fall off the bed. When I did she made that noise!” He was waving his hands around in his discomfort.

My shoulders hitched, my stomach clenching from how badly I wanted to laugh at the petrified shock on Jake’s face. He saved us from extreme embarrassment so I was thankful for that and held my laughter in. Charlie’s eyes met mine again and his fingers relaxed slightly though he didn’t let go.

“You’re okay?” He asked again, softly. I nodded my head and he pulled me into his chest for his famous bear hug. “It was so good to hear that sound, sweetheart!” He cooed into my hair. His large hands pulled me into him as he squashed the daylights out of me. My arms wrapped around him and I held my hands behind his back, squeezing him just as tight as I could. He seemed to need the comfort.

I met Billy’s eyes over my dad’s shoulder and smiled with a little finger wave. Billy’s eyes were teared up as well and I sagged into my dad. Growing up every summer on the Rez, Billy had become somewhat of a second father to me. I knew I needed to get the help they wanted me to get but I just didn’t know how to go about it. I was just a weak little girl. There was no way that speaking out was going to make me stronger. I just didn’t believe that.

Charlie and Billy moved back out into the living room and I heard the fridge shut. The famous sound of Vitamin R getting opened reached my ears and I rolled my eyes. Jake shouldered past me and turned to trap me in his bedroom as I started to walk out, his hands on the door frame. His eyes were serious, his mouth a firm line and I stepped back, wondering at this change in him.

“I’m not sorry.” He stated roughly before turning around and rushing through the small house and out the front door.

Shaking my head, confused, I wandered back to the dads and plopped down on the couch, adjusting my skirt so it wouldn’t ride up and flash anyone. A glance at the clock told me that it was getting close to my bedtime. I tapped my wrist like there was a watch on it when Charlie looked over at me and he nodded his head. Thankfully, he wasn’t the one who cracked open a beer.

Clapping his hands to his thighs during a commercial break, Charlie stood and yawned a little too loudly. “Well! I think me and the girl are going to head home and hit the rack. You take care of yourself old man.” He slapped Billy on the shoulder on his way by and winked at me.

Billy scowled as he rolled his chair after my father and I stood back to watch the show. “I’m in my prime! Keep it up and I’ll ram you in the ankles!” He grunted the last word as he used his arms to force himself closer to my father and my shoulders shook with the force of my breathy laughter.

The old men continued to poke fun at each other as I gathered the Tupperware we brought. Jake’s head peeked out from the garage, seemingly looking for the cruiser and when he found it, he looked toward the house and his eyes met mine in the kitchen window. I waved and gave a small smile but he ducked back inside the makeshift garage he had named the Taj Mahal without responding to me. That hurt my feelings because I had no idea what had changed his abrupt mood. I followed my dad out to the car and kept my eyes on the garage until it was out of sight.

Jake hadn’t peeked out again.

Later that night after I had changed into a baggy tee and boyshort undies, I climbed into bed and remembered to check my phone. Dragging my backpack and purse onto the bed from where I’d set it in front of my nightstand, I settled back against my pillows. Pulling the phone out of my Marvel bag and readying my backpack for tomorrow’s school day, I saw that I had a crapton of missed texts. Figuring that a few more moments won’t hurt, I took the time to dig through the backpack to find the charger before I responded. Too lazy to actually get out of bed, I leaned over to the side and stretched my arm under my nightstand so that I could plug the charger into the outlet. After my phone was plugged in, I scrolled through the texts. I had four from Alice, two from Rosalie and two from Edward. Never having a phone before, I felt sort of exasperated with them all. Though I was sure I would get used to it once I got the hang of using a smartphone.

Alice was bugging me to ask Charlie about this weekend and I wish I had seen this earlier because I would have remembered. Now it had to wait until morning and I hoped I didn’t forget again. Because of the way Labor Day fell, school was only in session Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday this week. I was cutting it close asking him last minute about my plans. She also invited me shopping Sunday. I dropped the phone and held my fists up to my shoulders as I did a little happy dance. Someone wants to go shopping with me! Her texts were full of little emoticons and funny characters so I figured I would take a page from her book.

I quickly texted her back to remind me in the morning about Charlie’s permission and gave her a thumbs up character about shopping Sunday with a large wide smile emoji.

Rosalie’s text messages were way more subdued. She offered her friendship by asking if she could sit with me tomorrow at lunch. I was glad because if she had invited me to sit with her and her siblings, I would have declined. I preferred sitting outside away from all the nosy little children staring at me. Her second text came a couple of hours later saying I didn’t have to feel like I had to let her sit with me. She was trying to come off as timid. I would have to let her know that she didn’t have to do that.

Edward’s texts made me smile and do a little bounce where I was sitting in the middle of my full size bed. They weren’t anything too special but to me they were everything. I really hoped that my gut feeling about these three wasn’t wrong. I felt like they could be my salvation. It was odd. I never felt that way about Jake and he’s not only been my best friend but known about my issues for a while now.

I had a really great time speaking with you today. I cannot wait until tomorrow.

The way he wrote and sometimes spoke, it was if he wasn’t from this time. As if maybe his parents raised him with different values. Perhaps they were old fashioned. The second text made me blush and wonder if maybe Edward was interested in me. I was a terrible judge of character when it came to these sorts of things. I didn’t want to get my hopes up. Though I didn’t consider myself an ugly duckling, I was definitely not within their leagues!

“And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars…”

I sent a quick text to Rosalie first, telling her she could sit with me if she wanted. With Edward’s chat screen open I debated for a solid ten minutes what to say before I finally chickened out and sent a quick “See you tomorrow” his way. I flopped back onto my pillows and sighed loudly. I was so awkward! Why was it so hard for me to just flirt with a cute guy? Granted, I had never had a boyfriend. Not only had I not been interested but I had never been allowed to socialize so that made things difficult. Maybe my past is what’s made me so different. Once again I find myself wishing I could go back in time and spend my childhood years with my father.

I sat upright when I thought I heard something chime from outside. It sounded like a cell phone chime but I couldn’t be sure, especially as it sounded from right outside my window but the only thing out there was a tree. Staring out my open window, I carefully got off of my bed and walked toward it. Placing my hands on the small window sill, I looked out the screen but saw nothing and no one. Shrugging one shoulder, I shut the window until it was only open a couple of inches and pulled the ivory lace curtains closed. I climbed back into bed and snuggled down after putting my cell phone on the nightstand and turning off my bedside lamp.

Sleep claimed me easily enough but my dreams kept me tossing and turning all night. Edward with pitch black eyes, fingers in the shape of claws as he stood protectively in front of me making a loud angry hissing noise. His red-gold hair was in wild filthy disarray and I longed to run my fingers through it but something like fear had me frozen. I dragged my eyes away from his strong muscular back to try catching a glimpse of whatever made him angry.

I wish I hadn’t.

That was the first night I woke up screaming.


	3. Charlie's Awesome

Charlie rushed into my bedroom, his eyes wide with panic as my bedroom door crashed against the wall behind it. His cotton pajama pants were halfheartedly pulled up, exposing the stripe at the top of his boxer briefs and he hadn’t bothered with a shirt in his haste.

“Bells? Bella!” His hands gripped my shoulders and he shook me slightly.

The scream died on my lips like the last of the helium leaving a popped balloon and my frantic eyes settled on my father’s concerned face before I burst into tears. Great, wrenching sobs left my mouth and wracked my body and Charlie hugged me tightly to him, cooing quietly and rubbing my back. My tears fell down onto his skin but he paid it no mind, as if they didn’t matter. He pulled me into his lap and I was slightly aware of my undressed state but he easily wrapped me in the comforter from my bed so I wasn’t exposed.

Smoothing my sweaty hair away from my face and over my shoulders, Charlie pulled back a little to look into my eyes. Some of the sleepiness had left his face as he comforted me and I felt guilty for his lack of sleep. He had a job to do. He didn’t need to be looking after me, though it warmed my heart at the same time that he did so.

“What happened, sweetheart?” His deep voice was thick with sleep still and I snuggled into him, willing the image behind my lids to disappear. I didn’t want to remember.

“It was a bad dream.” I signed away from my body awkwardly as I was cuddled up to my father’s bare chest. The dark curls scattered over his torso tickled my cheek and nose but I didn’t move away. It had been so long since I’d had such deep comfort from my father and I relished it.

“A bad dream?” He asked as he continued to stroke my hair and I nodded. “Do you wanna talk about it?” I shook my head. I just wanted to forget. “Okay. That’s okay, Bells. Do you want some tea?” I shook my head again and pulled away from him so that I could scoot back against my pillows.

“I just want to forget.” I gestured, my face scrunched up with my pain. “I need to forget already!” Slamming my fists down onto the comforter on either side of me in my anger, I let the tears track down my face. Charlie moved closer and wiped the tears with his open palms, shushing me.

“I’m here for you, Bells. I’m here for whatever you need.” He reassured me. I was glad for it. Knowing he would be here for me no matter what would make everything that much easier.

“I suppose I should call Tiffany.” I signed tiredly. I just wanted to forget. I knew Tiffany would try to get me to open up...It was her job after all. I had only spoken to her over the phone one time at Charlie’s urging the first night I got to Forks but I was too scared to meet with her in person. She had told me that in order to forget, I had to remember. That was the part that scared me most of all but if I am going to dream of them anyway, why not talk about it so that I could forget that much quicker. I didn’t think I could survive if I had to see that evil in my dreams every night.

Charlie didn't push the issue, simply nodding his agreement.

Logically, I knew that I didn’t have to worry about my tormentor anymore. Logically, I knew she was dead. I knew he was dead too. Illogically, everything they put me through made it impossible for me to think logically. I did all that I could to push the evil out of my head so that I didn’t have to think about it. So that I didn’t have to remember.

I glanced over to the window and realized the curtains were pushed open. Glancing suspiciously around the room, I didn’t notice anything else out of place. The rocking chair by the window looked to be tilted at a different angle but I could very well have bumped into it and not realized it. The window was still opened only a couple of inches. Just as my gaze was traveling back to the bed and Charlie, I noticed something else.

The screen was gone.

“Did we have a storm last night?” I asked my father without taking my eyes off of the window.

Charlie glanced that way as well before shaking his head. “No. It’s a clear night, Bells. Why?” He asked.

I shook my own head while I replied. “Just wondering where the screen went. I thought maybe the wind took it away.” I shrugged.

Charlie stood and walked over to the window, lifting it up and examining the frame. Sticking his head out the window he harrumphed and turned toward me as he straightened up. “It’s on the ground. That’s weird. It’s never just popped out before.”

“I’ll get it in the morning.” I told him. He didn’t need to bother with worrying about anything else. I was enough stress as it was.

“Don’t you worry about a thing, sweetheart. Don’t forget. I’m here if you need me for anything. We’ve got another hour before we gotta be up. Try to get some sleep okay?” He asked as his feet carried him to the bedroom door. He pulled it toward him and glanced behind it before looking at me sheepishly. “I gotta fix that soon.”

I waved goodbye to him as he left and pulled the door closed behind him. Turning on the bedside lamp, I figured I may as well get ready for the day as there was no reason for me to shut my eyes again. It was already after five and I didn’t want anymore nightmares. Looking at the wall behind the door, I let out a breathy snicker. A doorknob sized hole lay in the drywall. I grabbed my purple owl pajama pants and pulled them up my legs before heading downstairs to start some coffee. I made sure to be quiet so that I didn’t disturb my dad anymore than I already had. Sneaking back into my room, I grabbed my clothes for the day.

By the time I was dressed in my soft navy vee neck tee and bootcut jeans, the coffee was done. On the way downstairs, I pulled my freshly brushed hair back into a low ponytail. It showcased how long my hair really was better than a high one. The ends brushed the top of my ass as I walked. Padding across the linoleum flooring in my socked feet, I grabbed a mug and made myself a cup of coffee with cream and sugar before carefully bringing it back to my room. I sat at the computer desk across from my bed and pulled out my photo album from the top desk drawer. I wasn’t sure why I was doing this to myself. I shouldn’t even look inside.

I stared at the cover of the photo album for several minutes as my coffee got cold and I debated whether I should open it or not. The flowers on the front began to blur and I realized there were tears in my eyes. I angrily wiped my face and shoved the album back inside my desk. As I spun around with my coffee cup, my eyes landed on the window.

The screen had been replaced.

I know I can’t be losing my mind but I couldn't help the chills that ran down my spine. Charlie is the one who saw it sitting on the ground. Something strange is going on in Forks, Washington that’s for sure.

Dismissing that for the moment, I decided that I didn’t want lukewarm coffee so I went back downstairs so that I could nuke the mug in the microwave. Instead of going back upstairs and freaking myself out some more, I sat at the old formica kitchen table and drank my caffeine. I enjoyed the way the heat scorched my raw throat. It had been a long time since I’d made that much noise and my vocal chords were not happy with me at the moment.

Two cups of coffee later, I went back to the bathroom to brush my teeth and rub moisturizer on my face and arms. Charlie’s alarm would be going off soon so I figured I would take my backpack downstairs and make him breakfast. Grabbing my phone and putting it on vibrate, I took my things downstairs and started making some scrambled eggs and sausage links with toast. The aroma brought my dad from his bedroom and when I heard the toilet flush, I placed a large helping of eggs, toast, and sausage on his side of the table.

My phone shook against my thigh in my pocket and I wondered who could be texting me. As soon as I saw the name, I realized I had asked Alice to remind me about asking Charlie if I could go to their house this weekend. We ate in silence and once he had pushed his plate away and patted his uniform covered belly, I signed my question to him.

“Is it okay if I go to a friend’s house this weekend?” I started but at his look, I realized I didn’t have to explain any further.

“You mean those kids you were talking to after school yesterday?” He asked knowingly, a smile pulling at his lips. When I nodded so did he. “The Cullen’s and Hale’s are a good bunch. I don’t mind so long as Dr. and Mrs. Cullen don’t.” He said matter-of-factly.

I did a little happy dance and Charlie chuckled at me. “You’re going to behave right? You know I’m too young to be a grandpa.” He warned. My face went beet red and I smacked my head on the table twice before my dad put his palm in my way, protecting my head.

Sitting back in my chair again I rolled my eyes. “Seriously dad...I’m hanging out with Rosalie and Alice. I can’t make you a grandpa that way.”

“Don’t give me that, I saw the way you and that boy were looking at each other.” He held up his hand to stop my signing as I tried to interrupt him. “I’m just saying be careful, is all. Don’t let him use you. I’d have to shoot him.”

I rolled my eyes again feeling like they were going to fall right out of my head and made the gesture for ‘Come on!’ with my most exasperated face. “I’m not a kid anymore, Dad. If I had an interest in this guy then it would be my fault if I got hurt. But I don’t. So.” I made the universal gesture for ‘That’s enough’ and got up from the table, turning my back on my dad - who harrumphed disbelievingly - to put the breakfast dishes in the sink all rinsed off. I would wash them after school. A quick check of the clock told me that we needed to get heading out the door and when I spun around to grab my backpack, Charlie was right in front of me with a soft look on his face.

“You don’t have to ask permission to go anywhere, Bells. Just make sure you tell me so that I don’t worry. That’s what the phone is for. Just keep me updated on everything. Okay?” His voice was gentle and I knew he was prepared for the tears his words would create but I wasn’t prepared for the onslaught of emotion that those words created inside me.

I wrapped my arms around my father and hung on tightly. I hadn’t had such a caring person in my life before. Not since Renee…

While he had me where he wanted me, he spoke quietly as if he were telling a big secret. “I know where to bury his body when he hurts you.”

Rearing back incredulously, my eyes wide with shock, I saw his mile wide grin and smacked his shoulder as I stepped back with my own smile. Boy, if anything were to come from Edward and me, he better hope he doesn’t mess anything up. I have a feeling my dad is only half joking!

“Let’s get going before you threaten anyone else’s lives.” I told him before lifting my backpack and heading to the door. Charlie was a step behind me out the door and locked up while I made myself comfortable in the cruiser.

Taking a moment to study the house I now called home, I felt another wave of nostalgia crawl over me. Charlie bought this little two story home for my mom when they first got married. He insisted on a stable place to live and had found this faded white house to be charming. Mom had been over the moon, talking about how she wanted to fix it up. I’d heard the stories growing up and now that I was living here with Charlie, I wanted to honor her memory by doing what she had planned. When he got into the cruiser and buckled up, I stopped him from pulling out of the driveway with a hand on his arm. He looked over at me curiously and I looked between the house and him for a moment.

“I want to fix up the house the way Mom wanted. Is that something we can do?” I asked him a little timidly. I didn’t want him to think I was stepping on her toes.

Charlie blinked as he looked between the house and me. “Sure, Bells. That’d be real good.” He said as he reached for my hand. Clasping my palm against his, he squeezed and I could almost feel the love pouring into me from that small gesture.

When we pulled into the school’s parking lot, Charlie spoke up. “Are you going to be okay, Bells? I’ve never heard you scream like that before.” He said worriedly. I was a little uncomfortable that he’d brought it up but I knew he was only concerned. I’m sure it sounded terrible.

I nodded my head. I didn’t want him to think I was going to break. I’d done enough breaking. I was determined to be whole again. “I’ll be fine. I’m doing my best not to think about it at all. I’ll let you know if I need you.” I signed and he beamed. He wanted me to need him, I could tell. I made a mental note to message him later about something silly. Maybe I needed him to pick me up some tampons.

I waved as Charlie drove away from the school and turned to head into Building One for Algebra but before I was able to get more than a few steps, Edward and Rosalie were in my way. Rosalie looked stunning in a tan cashmere turtleneck tee and matching heels with dark skinny jeans, her hair was in loose waves down her back. Edward of course, was drool worthy with his relaxed fit jeans hugging his hips, dark gray work boots on his feet, and gray henley shirt that hugged every muscle in his torso. A thick navy puffer vest that he left unzipped adorned his shoulders, allowing me a peek at his tight abdominal muscles.

I should wipe the drool from my chin.

Edward barked out a laugh and I looked up at him quizzically. He shrugged and glanced at Rosalie so I just assumed she had done something funny while I was checking him out. At least I had been distracted from my perusal.

“Hey guys.” I signed at them while I started walking toward where I needed to be before I sat down on the concrete steps leading to the metal doors. Rosalie sat next to me though she made a face as if it pained her to sit on the ground at all. It was a little damp but it had never bothered me. Even now, sitting in only the tee I threw on without a coat, I felt just fine.

“How are you doing today, Bella?” Edward asked as well as signed as he leaned against the pipe banister beside me. I looked up at him and smiled sweetly.

“I’m doing okay.” I was going to keep signing but the concerned look he gave me made me pause. “What’s wrong?”

Shifting awkwardly on his feet, Edward crossed one ankle over the other before righting himself to stand straight. “You just seemed like something was bothering you.” He said softly, his hands moving slowly as if he didn’t want to sign the words.

I thought through my actions since getting out of the cruiser and didn’t think I’d even been too deep in thought about anything. Pushing the images in my mind of my nightmare away again, I watched Edward’s face closely. He looked thunderous for just a moment until he smoothed his face out to the sweet crooked smile I was beginning to love. I wondered if he might have a touch of bipolar.

“I had a bad dream last night but otherwise I’m doing okay. How are you guys?” I signed as I looked from Edward to his sister. “Where’s Alice?” I added quickly.

“Alice stayed home today. She had a...doctor’s appointment.” Rosalie said. If not for the small vocal pause she made, I might have believed her but let it go. It obviously wasn’t any of my business where the little girl was.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Edward pressed, looking as if he wanted me to divulge my inner most secrets.

“I’m good.” I reassured him. Standing from the steps when I realized we were in the way of the other students, I stood close to Edward. He moved his arm up, as if to lay across my shoulders but didn’t follow through, instead choosing to wrap his fingers around the banister behind my back. I sighed inwardly.

Feeling like a love sick school girl again, I decided it was time to run away. “I’m headed to class. I’ll see you guys at lunch.”

Before they could respond and using my secret to ignore Edward’s surprised call of my name, I rushed up the steps and into Algebra where Mr. Knox greeted me with a smile. Math class went quickly and so did English. I wasn’t aware yesterday that Rosalie was in that class with me but aside from a quick smile and wave, I concentrated on my coursework. I was letting my thoughts get the best of me all because I was trying to keep other more evil thoughts out of my head. I was quickly becoming obsessed with one Edward Cullen and I felt stupid. The man was gorgeous and I say man because he is more than a mere boy. He’s tall, gorgeous, sophisticated, funny...Did I mention gorgeous?

I crossed my eyes at the notebook on my desk and jotted down more notes from class, trying to push Edward out of my head as well.

Rosalie saddled up next to me as we left English and offered to walk me to class, signing the whole way about how she was excited that I would be going to their house in just two days. Apparently Alice had so many plans and I balked at the thought of being used as a live doll for her to dress. I told Rosalie this and her laugh had me staring at her in awe. The woman’s lips tilted up enticingly and she threw her head back as she laughed, her long hair shimmering in the florescent lights above us in the hallway.

“Everyone is Alice’s live dress up doll! You’ll get used to it. Just tell her what kind of clothing you prefer and you’ll have an endless supply for life!” She signed while she laughed.

I was a little uncomfortable with that tidbit. I didn’t want Alice or anyone else spending beaucoup bucks on me. Gifts were alright sure, but an entire endless wardrobe? That was going a bit far, even if the Cullen’s and Hale’s were loaded...Which they dressed like they were.

“I definitely don’t need an endless supply.” I countered. “I just want a shopping buddy.”

Rosalie’s eyes lit up with happiness at the mention of shopping. “Alice and I love to shop! Did she invite you to go with us Sunday? We need dresses for the dance.” She signed and spoke excitedly and I let out a breathy giggle, putting my hand over my mouth to exaggerate the motion.

I was nodding before she was finished her sentence but stopped when she mentioned the dance. My eyes widened and I grew more and more excited as I realized she was right. The Homecoming dance was the weekend of my birthday!

“Oh I completely forgot about the dance! I need the perfect dress. I can’t wait to go dancing. I love to dance!” I signed dramatically causing Rosalie to giggle at me. It didn’t even matter to me that I didn’t have a date. I realized I had been hearing the boys ask the girls all morning but no one had approached me. Tickets were going on sale on Tuesday when school was back in session.

Rosalie and I stopped at my History class where she signed that she would see me at lunch. I was thankful that I’d thrown some veggie sticks in my bag this morning along with my travel mug. I wouldn’t even have to enter the cafeteria and subject myself to the stares and not-so-quiet whispers.

Edward appeared next to me as I was admiring the landscaping along the sidewalk on my way to the picnic tables outside the cafeteria. I was a little worried that he would ask me why I bolted this morning but I didn’t need to be. He didn’t speak, simply waved and smiled. I returned the gestures and we walked in comfortable silence. Well, he looked comfortable. I was just plain nervous. My heart was beating a million miles a minute and my palms were starting to sweat. He did inexplicable things to my tummy and nether regions just by being close enough for me to smell him. Whatever cologne he used, I needed to invest in some and spray it on my pillow at night before I fell asleep. I didn’t think I would have any nightmares if I could fall asleep imagining his arms around me and sniffing him would make it seem like he really was right there with me.

I risked a glance at my walking partner just before we reached the awning. He was smiling at the ground as if someone had given him a great present. I wish I had been the one to put that smile there.

Edward’s POV

I walked at a fast human pace out of my last class when the bell rang and I rifled through the minds of students as I tried to find Bella. I caught the tenor of her thoughts just as she was thinking about coming to look for me. She was outside the Main Office while she waited for her father to pick her up.

Alice appeared next to me as I left the building furthest from the Main Office and I quickly checked the minds in the area for suspicion before giving my tiny sister a stern look. She giggled and wrapped her arm in mine as we walked.

“You should offer to pick her up and drop her off.” She said, her voice full of amusement. She must have seen something that she wasn’t telling me about.

I played dumb. “Who?” What good would that do? Why was I letting myself get close to this girl? I had never been close to any humans before and I certainly never got close to any females aside from my family. I couldn’t help the draw that I felt toward Bella, but I didn’t understand it so my first reaction was to push against it.

Knowing I was being purposely ignorant, Alice ignored me and kept speaking. “She’s going to be coming to our house this weekend. I’ve already started picking out clothes for her to try on. She’s going to love all of them. You should see the outfit she’s going to wear this evening, Edward. She’s going to be stunning!” I tried looking into her mind for the outfit but she was blocking me.

I sighed wistfully. “She already is.” I said under my breath and I heard Rosalie’s chuckle as she fell into step beside us. “Why would you tell me I need to see it but block me from actually seeing it?” I asked, annoyed. She didn’t answer. It was basically a rhetorical question anyway seeing as she has always had her own reasonings for everything she does. We were approaching Bella now who looked genuinely surprised to see my sisters with me, which was evident when her wide smile faded slightly.

Her thoughts flew by quicker than a normal teenager’s thoughts as she regarded what my sisters wore and I watched the play of emotions on her face. A touch of self consciousness and uneasiness with Rosalie’s perfection and then the utter fascination with Alice’s getup. I was a bit taken back when I caught her thoughts about shopping and really wanting the strapless dress that Alice was wearing. I stored that bit of information away for later. Alice introduced herself as I stepped close to Bella. I needed to feel her against me and it made me happy that she relaxed at my nearness. These feelings still didn’t make much sense to me but I had already resolved myself to speaking with Carlisle or Esme this evening.

The girls exchanged a few words and as Rosalie was speaking, Alice sent me a vision of the next few minutes. Apparently it was up to me to invite Bella over.

“It’s the only way she will agree to say yes. Watch.” Alice thought to me. I watched as the vision of Alice asking Bella to come over and then Rosalie both end with Bella backing out awkwardly for some reason but if I asked, she would be at our house and shopping with my sisters on Sunday. “Someone’s got a crush!” Alice’s sing-song voice penetrated my brain. I made the decision to roll my eyes and when Alice received that vision she stuck her tongue out at me.

I touched Bella’s arm softly and she actually startled. I could feel the warmth of her skin penetrate my fingertips and soar straight to my heart, seeming to warm me from the inside out. I smiled my apology to her before I asked with my hands if she would like to come over. Watching her awe as she stared at my fingers and hearing her inner monologue about how mesmerizing I seemed to be had me holding in a chuckle. Alice, of course, had no qualms about laughing aloud, which knocked Bella back into reality. I spoke as well as signed this time.

Bella agreed and started making internal connections about our similarities, though there were few. She even wondered if we wore colored contacts. It made me wonder why she herself would wear contacts at all. I found that the more she stopped her thought process, the more I wanted to know all about her. It was strange to me the way she could cut off a train of thought as if it were never there. She intrigued me in so many ways. I was thrilled to my core when her thoughts turned a bit intimate then she would blush and I found out that she had never even had a boyfriend before.

A few more minutes of conversation went by then Chief Charlie Swan pulled up in the light blue and gray Fork’s Police cruiser, his face alight with a megawatt smile and I saw in his thoughts how he was so happy that his daughter was making friends. Fragmented images flew through his mind so fast I almost missed some of them. A ten year old Bella crying in her father’s arms. A thirteen year old Bella being picked up from the airport in rags and filthy hair, using ASL. A still thirteen year old Bella dressing in fifties pin-up clothing, reinventing herself with her father’s blessing. A fifteen year old Bella in a hospital with heavy bandages wrapped around her torso and head. I quickly left his mind, afraid that the growl I was trying to contain would escape.

I was thrust back into the real world when Bella handed Rosalie a small piece of paper with her phone number on it. I glanced at it and quickly mesmerized it. I would be messaging her tonight after I spoke with my ‘parents’ and I told her so.

After our goodbye’s, Bella left in the cruiser with her father, praying that he wouldn’t embarrass her by asking about what he witnessed. She was so adorable in her shy awkwardness. She hid it well but her thoughts revealed how she really felt.

Alice and Rosalie were in my red Volvo s60 before I was and I tried again to figure out what they had planned. “Not that I’m really complaining, but why are you both so determined to have Bella in our lives? You know it’s risky having a human so close to us.” I asked as nonchalantly as I could. The look Rosalie gave me from the backseat told me I was unsuccessful.

Eyeing me with disdain, Rosalie shrugged. “We need some drama.”

I knew there was more to it as Alice was singing the latest pop song loudly in her head, tapping her fingers to the beat and Rosalie slammed her mental door shut. Sighing, realizing I wasn't getting anywhere with these two, I threw the car in drive and sped out of the parking lot. The drive home took no time at all and we were down our three mile long driveway and parking in front of our home within five minutes of leaving the school.

Carlisle wasn’t home from his shift at the hospital yet, as it was only quarter after two in the afternoon so I went to find Esme. Bypassing the house altogether, I sped around to the back - ignoring the beautiful landscaping that my ‘mother’ was so proud of - and found her wrist deep in weeding her vegetable garden. She kept growing fresh vegetables so that she could cook meals for the local food pantry at the Fork’s church. Reverend Webber was always so happy that Esme would help, especially since she always made him and his family their own special dish each month.

“Esme, do you have a moment? I have a problem.” I stated frankly as I appeared next to her.

Turning her head to face me but continuing her work, she looked concerned. “What’s the matter? Did something happen at school?” She asked me, thousands of thoughts racing through her head from a slip-up and having to move to a local getting suspended for some inane reason.

Quickly mollifying her, I shook my head. “Nothing happened, per se. It’s just that…” I trailed off as I ran my fingers through my hair. This made Esme pause as I’m never one without words. She stopped digging through her garden and wiped her hands on her jeans as she stood straight and came up to me. Looping her arm in mine, she silently walked us over to the large wood stained gazebo.

We sat down on the bench arm in arm and she leaned her head against my shoulder. The petite caramel haired vampire that played the part of my mother was really my best friend. She had always been my confidant, even when I’d returned from my rebellious years she had been there for me, never judging even when her mate was. Carlisle wasn’t as judgemental as he could have been but he was severely disappointed in me. He had been the one to sire me and I had hated him for a long time but after my decade long hiatus from the animal diet, he had practically shunned me for a time. Esme was the one who helped us form the bond we now had.

“Take your time, Edward. I’m here for you.” She spoke softly as if she were afraid to startle me. It put me at ease and the words just started flowing.

“Her name is Isabella Swan, though she prefers to be called Bella. She’s got the loveliest smile and her skin is almost as white as ours. Her hair has so many shades of red and blonde in it that if I didn’t know better, I would have thought she dyed it. Her tiny hands are mesmerizing and her smile lights up my whole world.”

Esme pulled away from me and blinked. Her mind was curiously blank.

I looked down at her. “What?” I asked.

She looked pointedly down at my hands and it was then that I realized I had been signing the entire time. My hands still in the position for ‘what?’. I saw in her mind that even my facial expression mimicked Bella’s when she signed the word.

“Why are you using American Sign Language, Edward? What is going on? Have you found your mate?” Her voice went from befuddled to jubilant and the word mate resonated within me. I recalled Rosalie’s mind-slip earlier at lunch.

“Mate.” I whispered, letting my hands fall limply into my lap.

The rest of the family, minus Carlisle, filed out of the house quickly and appeared in front of us inside the gazebo. Jasper and Emmett stared at me in shock as Alice and Rosalie looked smug. Images floated like flower petals on a warm breeze through my head from the thoughts of my family as they all recalled the first time they had met their soul mates. The feelings that coursed through each vampire now as they thought back were the same feelings that I had had inside me all day long since I’d first laid eyes on Bella Swan. Could it be possible? But she’s a human! This could not happen. I could not take away Bella’s…

“Don’t you even start that, Edward Masen Cullen!”

The angry voice that scolded me was not the one I had initially thought would do so. Rosalie stood in front of me in all of her angry glory, her eyes black as night, her golden hair ruffling in the slight breeze. I stared at her, as did her mate and Jasper. Alice stayed still as stone with a smug smile on her little face.

Taking a menacing step forward, Rosalie pointed her manicured finger at my nose. “You will not make any decisions without her, do you understand? This is not your choice alone. It is hers. And she doesn’t get to have someone who should be standing by her side for eternity taking away her choices. She’s had enough taken from her as it is!” Her voice was loud with fury, her lisp more pronounced as she yelled at me.

Alice was jolted out of a vision that I hadn’t caught sight of and she laughed heartily until Jasper wrapped his arm around her tiny waist and pulled her into him, sending her some peaceful waves. She side eyed him in annoyance before kissing his cheek and pulling out of his grasp and walking up to stand next to Rosalie. I was still stunned stupid over my revelation and then Rosalie’s short tirade as I sat next to Esme.

“You won’t have to tell her anything Edward. Trust me. She already knows, she just needs the right motivation to remember. As for choices, Rosalie, you already know it’s a done deal.” Alice said, all-knowingly.

That angered me slightly. “What do you mean, it’s a done deal? She already knows? What has she been through, Alice? Do you know?” I stood to my full height over my tiny sister and Jasper stepped in behind her, warning clear in his narrowed eyes. I stepped back and let my shoulders relax so he would know I wasn’t threatening his mate and he nodded once, appeased.

“I can’t tell you anything. You know I don’t know how this crap works. It just does. Let things take their course and you’ll have your mate before you know it. In the meantime, just be there for her. Protect her from the shadows and you’ll see what happens!” Cryptic little turd. Sometimes I wanted to throttle her.

Esme cut in then. “So you found your mate then? When can I meet her? Oh I’m so happy for you, Edward!” She threw her arms around my neck and lifted up onto her tiptoes to hug me tightly. I hugged her back, still unsure about the whole situation. “Is she deaf? Is that why you were signing earlier?” She asked me.

I shook my head and stood back, feeling oddly defensive of Bella. “No. She’s been through a lot. No one knows what…” Alice scoffed and I glared at her. Apparently Alice knew but wasn’t telling me. “She’s mute. She won’t talk to anyone at all, ever and hasn’t in almost a decade according to her paperwork at school.”

Esme’s face was the picture of ultimate sadness and she hugged herself until I wrapped her in my arms again. “Everything will be okay, Esme.” Alice said softly.

The thoughts of my family and my own uneasiness about my feelings were starting to get to me and I needed to think, alone.

“You don’t have time for that, Edward. You’ve got to go for a hunt before you get to Bella’s. I’m not sure what’s going to happen tonight but I know you need to be at her house all night.”

“Is she in trouble?” I asked, feeling a little panicked.

“No, no. Just be outside her bedroom window tonight. She will be home late so don’t worry.” Still being cryptic, I hugged Esme again and touched Rosalie’s arm.

“Thank you all. I don’t know what’s going on exactly, but I also don’t know what I’d do without all of you.” I said passionately. The women smiled at me while the men rolled their eyes. Emmett thought I was being a sissy. I shoved his shoulder on my way past him.

Racing up to my room, I changed into something more suitable. A pair of old jeans that I’d kept Alice from throwing away and a black tee shirt. I heard Alice speaking to Esme in hyper-hushed tones. I couldn’t even penetrate her thoughts to spy on the conversation as she was still singing pop songs in her head. She seems to have advised the same to the rest of the family. Sometimes I cursed the many facets of the vampire mind. Esme squealed at something my little sister said and the rest of my family laughed loudly. I chuckled at the delight in Esme’s voice and figured that no matter what Alice was hiding from me, it all must work out in the end for Esme to be so happy for me.

There was still plenty of time before I had to go to Bella’s house so I ran off into the woods behind the house and jumped over the Calawah River in one simple push off of the embankment. I figured I would take this time to hunt a little further from home. Finding myself almost in Canada, I bagged myself an elk and then a cougar before heading back home at a more sedate pace. Twilight was upon me and I was getting anxious to get to Bella’s but I didn’t know what time I should be there. I decided to seek out Alice after a quick shower to see if she could give me a more exact time.

Sitting on Jasper’s lap in his study as he poured over some old history documents, she tapped her fingers on the maple desk as she looked at me expectantly. I plopped down in the overstuffed chair across from the two lovebirds and sighed dramatically.

“Oh get on with it already.” Jasper muttered without removing his eyes from his paperwork. I saw in his mind that he was contemplating buying his parent’s land for the third time. There was an interested buyer and though Jasper didn’t need the money, he was unsure as to whether or not he should hang onto the past the way he had been. I left him to ponder without giving my two cents.

I still had my parent’s home in Old Town, Chicago.

“Yes, brother. Please do, get on with it.” Alice stated primly and I scowled at her. She knew what I wanted.

“Please tell me what you know, Alice. I am dying here.” I pleaded as I sagged against the back of the chair and threw one hand in my hair, tugging on the ends while my other hand gripped the arm of the chair. Jasper eyeballed me and I loosened my grip. He threw me through the window the last time I ruined a piece of his furniture.

“You’re already dead. Cut the melodrama.”

“Isn’t that exactly what Rosalie said we needed when I questioned you about Bella?” I interrupted.

It was her turn to scowl at me.

“Shut up. I can’t tell you much without changing the future. Certain things need to happen or it all gets messed up. We bring Bella into our lives. She tells us how she knows of us. She ends up being changed.”

I sighed loudly, angrily at the thought of her life being taken away from her. She was a pure soul and I wanted to cherish her as she was. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to have her by my side for eternity but wasn’t there another way?

Alice looked like she could spit fire and Jasper placed a firm hand on her tiny shoulder without looking up from his paperwork. “Don’t even start.” She said, using Rosalie’s previous words. “I already told you and Rosalie already yelled at you. This is Bella’s choice. Do not make this harder than it has to be, Edward. You know she’s been through something so traumatic that she doesn’t speak. Do not be another ‘tormentor’.” She snapped as she leaned forward on Jasper’s lap, placing both of her hands on the desk.

The word made me pause and I felt sick as I remembered that word floating around in Bella’s head. I would not hurt my mate in any way...it felt really good to even think of her in that manner. I would just have to figure out how to handle my innermost feelings myself. I would not take away Bella’s choices.

Alice sat back against Jasper’s chest like she won a prize and his arm slid around her torso. “Thank you. Be at Bella’s by ten o’clock.” She waved her hand at me, dismissing me from the study as images of twisting around on her mate’s lap entered her mind. I scrunched my face up in disgust as I quickly left the room, slamming the door on her delighted laughter.


	4. Not Enough Answers

Edward’s POV

Alice had told me to be at Bella’s house by ten p.m. but I had been so on edge and antsy that I had gotten here around nine instead. I settled in for a long night in the thick of the evergreen pine tree that sat outside Bella’s bedroom window. She wouldn’t be able to see me even if she had tried. The cruiser rolled up the short drive and parked a few feet from the front porch steps before Bella and Charlie got out and headed inside. I couldn’t see them from where I was sitting but I was able to listen to their movements.

After Charlie hugged his daughter and settled in front of the television with a beer, Bella cleaned up the kitchen before going to her room with thoughts of a young native boy in her head. She seemed sad that he had left her side tonight and I wondered what happened. She gathered an old gray tee and a pair of baby blue boyshort undies and I watched in rapt fascination as Bella’s hips sashayed around the bedroom in her beautiful panel dress. The retro look really worked for her and I made a mental note to tell Alice to stock up. I tried very hard to keep my eyes closed while she was getting dressed for bed...or rather...undressed. I opened my eyes a bit too soon, too impatient with not seeing her and worried about Alice’s cryptic words about my needing to be here, that I saw Bella’s behind as she scooted into bed and brought the covers up to her hips.

I groaned quietly as the image of her creamy half exposed ass stayed burned in my mind and I adjusted myself. This is what I get for being a virgin at over a century old. The first girl I’m interested in and I’m already embarrassing myself. Thank God she doesn’t know I’m out here. I willed my body to behave and tore my mind away from the more vulgar side of things while I watched as Bella plugged in her phone and read through the text messages. The cutest little dance was done when she read that Alice had invited her to go shopping with Rosalie and herself. Her long hair cascaded down her shoulders and back and bounced as she did, making me smile. I longed to run my fingers through her hair and hold her close to me.

It was easy to succumb to the mate bond, now that I knew that’s what it was. I wouldn’t have to fight it at all once Bella acknowledged her attraction for me. I hoped that she would do that soon. She seemed to have issues thinking that I was too good for her and that was preposterous of course. I was the monster. She was the angel. Her thoughts about the three of us possibly being her salvation made my dead heart swell and I hoped that we could do her right.

I watched as she stared at her phone, looking completely lost after she read my texts, trying to decide what to message me back. I stifled a laugh when she finally typed something out and hit send before diving back onto her pillows and sighing exasperatedly with herself.

“I’m so awkward!” She thought.

As her thoughts turned toward her past, I noticed how her brain seemed to be careful of thinking too deeply, as if she was somehow cutting it off. Normally, the teenage brain simply bounces from one topic to another but Bella’s brain seemed to be as organized as she was. It both intrigued me and frustrated me. I wanted to know everything about her.

My phone chimed and I cursed out loud as I snatched my phone from my pocket and silenced it. Bella was up and out of bed, slowly walking toward the window and I held my breath, silently hoping I was correct and that she wouldn’t see me hiding in the middle of the tree. The pine needles were thick this time of year and I was hoping that I was well shielded from her eyes. Thankfully that seemed to be the case as she pulled the window mostly closed and drew the curtains. I forgot to shut my eyes at all when she turned and walked back to bed. Her pert little bottom seemingly in my face though she was in her room and I wasn’t.

It was going to be a long night for me, I realized, as I watched her drift off to sleep. The cute noises she made when she tossed and turned, the soft snores that left her mouth. Before I knew it, I was in her room without ever recalling how I’d managed to get in. I stood next to her bed and looked down on the sweetest woman I had ever laid eyes on. My phone lit up in my pocket just as my hand was stretching toward my sweet girl and it seemed to jog me out of my thoughts. Realizing that I was indeed standing inside Bella’s bedroom while she slept, I jumped back out the window and shut it so that it was only open a couple of inches, just as she left it.

What was I doing? Why was I even in her room? My phone lit up again and this time I checked it. Alice had messaged me twice. The first time was to tell me to get out of the bedroom. The second one was letting me know to keep a lid on my inner vampire. He recognized his mate and wanted her. The humane part of us was aware that we had to do things at a normal human pace but my inner vampire wanted his mate and nothing should be able to stand in his way. I would have to curb him and that could prove to be difficult.

I settled back against the trunk of the tree again and pressed my palm against a branch, moving it just slightly so that I could look in through her window pane. The night flew by while I listened to Bella sleep and watched her dreaming. Most of her dreams were nonsensical colors or words as if she dreamed in sketches. One of the clearer dreams was of Bella and Charlie out to a nondescript diner eating dinner and laughing together.

It was nearing dawn when suddenly the tossing and turning got worse, tangling the blanket around her legs as she flailed in bed. The colors in her dream turned dark and menacing and I was standing in front of her in the middle of a fog filled wildflower field. I had one hand extended back towards Bella, while my other hand was curled into claws as I faced off with a vampire. The red in her narrowed eyes sent chills down my spine as I watched how she looked at my Bella.

I recognized this vampire. I had never met her face to face but I had seen her in the minds of others and she was definitely evil incarnate.

I was thrown out of the nightmare as Bella wrenched up in bed quickly, a horrified scream bursting from between her lips, ripping me violently from my own mind. Thoughts of her tormentor raced through her brain quickly and I wondered how Bella had survived that vampire. I gripped the branch harder, leaving marks that I knew I would have to smooth out and wrapped my other arm behind me, around the tree’s trunk so that I would stay in place. Her voice cracked as the scream peaked in volume. I heard Jasper’s thoughts just before his calming waves crashed over me and I was thankful. I couldn’t throw myself into Bella’s bedroom. Especially not right now no matter how much I wanted it. I read in his mind how Alice had sent him here for just this purpose.

Charlie slammed his way into the room, his thoughts as frantic as his eyes and he wasted no time in scooping his daughter up and placing her in his lap, wrapping her up in her blanket. The sobs that pulled from her chest twisted my heart and my eyes filled with stinging venom. Each pained wail that tore from Bella’s throat made my own constrict and I wished I could be the one to comfort her.

The Chief soothed her, stroking her hair and cooing softly to her while she cried and she clung to him like a limpet. Soon after her cries softened her anger flared and she signed angrily to her father about wanting to forget. The image of the vampire was clear in her mind and I could tell how frightened she was since Jasper was also trying to calm her down though in much gentler waves so she wouldn’t notice.

As she told Charlie that she should call whom I assumed was a therapist, I mentally hoped that she would. Whereas I would love to be the one to help her through everything, it would be good for her to seek help in the real world before she ended up crammed in mine. I wondered if she knew who she was dealing with. Did she know that the ‘tormentor’ as she called her was a vampire? An image of a male flashed through her mind as she thought of the other ‘tormentor’. He was also a vampire and I was glad they were dead. I hoped she knew that for sure, but how could she unless she saw them burn? If she saw them die then surely she would know they were vampires...or at least not human. How did she get thrust into this world? I had too many questions and no answers.

As suddenly as the dream had unified all of her thoughts on the matter dissipated and I was left with a feeling of wonder. How did she do that? How did she simply ‘push the evil out’ and stop thinking about it? This would consume my thoughts until I knew what had happened to my mate. I had this all-consuming need to protect her from everything...including the past.

I knew I was in deep shit when she noticed first the curtains and then the screen. I hadn’t even realized I had pushed the curtains open or bumped into the rocking chair but I must have because I knew that she hadn’t when she investigated my phone chiming earlier. I had messed up too many times tonight. Charlie stuck his head out the window and his thoughts were suspicious - piquing my interest - as he looked at the screen lying on the ground. He played it off well then quickly gave an excuse to go back to bed, looking rather abashed as he examined the hole in the wall behind the bedroom door.

I watched in fascination as Bella went through her morning routine. It seemed a little redundant to me to go up and down the stairs so many times. Why wouldn’t she set the coffee pot to automatic the night before? Sometimes the things humans did made no sense to me. While she was downstairs, I quickly replaced the screen.

She was dressed in a soft looking navy blue tee and it looked amazing against her creamy complexion. I admired it while she sat at her desk staring at a photo album, debating whether she should open it or not. Blurry images flew through her mind of an auburn haired pale woman with kind hazel eyes and an eclectic taste in clothing. Bella spun around quickly in her desk chair, angrily wiping her eyes from the tears that formed there and I wondered at who the woman was.

Her eyes landed on the window and I heard in her mind that she noticed the screen had been replaced.

Crap. I just kept messing up. I should have waited until she was back downstairs, which is what she did after pushing away thoughts of odd things going on in her new hometown.

Shaking my head at myself for my ineptness, I raced to the edge of the yard and sat in a tree out of sight so that I could see into the kitchen window. I watched as she made breakfast for her and her father and was thoroughly entertained when he razzed her about coming to my house this weekend. Her exasperation and his witty retorts had me chuckling to myself almost constantly. When he told her quietly that he knew where to bury my body, it startled a laugh out of me and I had to clamp my hand over my mouth. Bella’s reaction was worth everything in that moment.

As they closed up the house and sat in the cruiser, Bella’s face became thoughtful and she asked her dad if they could fix up the house as images of her mother floated around in her head. The same woman she was thinking of in the bedroom, with the eclectic taste and happy smile, had passed on. I didn’t know how or when but I knew I would have to dance lightly on the subject when I brought it up someday.

I raced home to change for school and grab my backpack. Rosalie was already in the car waiting for me and she bugged me the whole ride to school about every small detail of my night. When I confided in my sister about Bella’s dream, Rosalie’s eyes turned to pitch and the growl that resonated inside her chest was vicious. She already thought of Bella as her new sister and wanted to protect her as well as I did. It warmed my heart that she wasn’t going to give me grief about a human mate and once again I found myself wondering what Alice and Rosalie knew.

Alice had kept her mouth shut about me entering Bella’s bedroom to Rosalie and for that I was thankful. I knew I was in the wrong and I would need to contain my actions from now on. No need to endure Rose’s wrath so early in the morning.

“Why isn’t Alice going to school today?” I asked Rose as we pulled into the school’s parking lot.

She picked up her zip-up binder, the only item she ever carried with her, and gave me a look, warning me to keep my cool. “She’s gone to Seattle to pick up some Rockabilly clothes for Bella.”

I cocked my head at my sister before I smiled. “That’s thoughtful.” I said simply and Rosalie gasped.

“You’re not going to give us the third degree about meddling? I’m shocked!” She over exaggerated, holding the binder to her chest with an open hand.

I laughed as I got out of the car and Rosalie followed suit. “I’m happy that you two like her. Change might not happen very often for us but when it does, it’s immediate and forever. Get her a whole store for all I care. Just be nice to her.” I said with a smile.

Rosalie lightly shoved my shoulder as she fell into step beside me.

“So…” I started, a little uneasily.

Stopping a moment to look at me, Rosalie placed a hand on my forearm. “What is it?” The compassion she held in herself for every one of her family members never ceased to amaze me.

I cleared my throat. “Did Alice tell all of you what Bella has gone through and is only keeping it from me?” It didn’t sit right with me that the whole of the family would know my mate’s problems or past when I barely had a hint of it.

“No, Edward.” Rosalie shook her head as she glanced around, checking for eavesdroppers before we started walking again. “Alice doesn’t even know the whole of it. She only has had visions of her since this last year we’ve been in Forks and the only time she gets a solid vision about it is when she decides to ask Bella about her past. She knows pieces but not everything. What she does know though…” My sister trailed off sadly with a shake of her head and I sighed.

“So what did she tell the rest of them then? I assume you know what Alice knows?”

“Alice has kept me informed because I wasn’t so thrilled that you would have a human mate. I didn’t want you to take away her choices but like we discussed last night…” She paused at my scoff. “Okay so we didn’t discuss it, I yelled. I’m sorry but you were going to act how I first reacted and I know now that isn’t what Bella needs. She didn’t tell the family anything except little tidbits of how you two will come to be together. That’s all.”

I breathed a little easier. I hadn’t realized how much the subject was bothering me. I should be the one to learn about my mate and then Bella should be able to tell the family if she chooses. I should have known Alice wouldn’t meddle to that point but sometimes I wondered. I smiled my gratefulness at Rosalie and we continued our slow pace to the school.

We were waiting for Bella together by Building One when her father dropped her off at the Main Office again. She will quickly realize how big of a pain that will be when the weather gets rainier as the autumn season goes on. Maybe I should offer her a ride. It would also help me get closer to her.

And closer I wanted to be, indeed.

A strangled laugh escaped me as Bella climbed from the cruiser thinking about asking Charlie to pick her up some tampons simply because he needed her to need him and Rosalie tilted her head at me, curiously. I shook my head as we approached her. Her thorough examination of our clothes had me smiling and once again a laugh slipped out as she thought she needed to wipe drool from her chin as she checked me out. She was entertaining as hell. I don’t know what I would do if I’d not been able to hear her inner monologue. Who am I kidding? There’s not been one person - human or vampire - who has been able to escape my telepathy. Rosalie might be able to shut me out but she’s had years of practice and has always been particularly determined.

I may have gone a little too far with my concern about Bella’s well being but her nightmare had me on edge. I couldn't very well ask her outright and that bugged me to no end. I desperately wanted to touch her but when I leaned against the banister, I found myself hesitating and that sent Bella off running thinking she was just another lovesick schoolgirl. I kicked myself in my own ass for not following through. I would have to work on my own insecurities.

"What was that all about?" Rosalie inquired as I stared after Bella.

Shaking my head, I sighed. "I'm making her feel as if she's just a silly girl with a crush. It's embarrassing her, the way she's thinking. She feels undeserving."

Rosalie put a hand on my shoulder and smiled gently. "Give it time, brother but don't wait on giving her a small gesture. It could end up meaning the world to her." She sauntered off to her own first period class and I smiled to myself as I thought over her advice.

Bella's thoughts all day revolved around me, though she tried to shove me out of her head. I was flattered and glad that she was having a tough time keeping me out. She consumed my every thought, it was only fair that I consumed hers. When she and Rosalie walked to History discussing shopping and dresses, I caught the train of thought about Bella’s birthday and immediately started planning. If she liked shopping, hopefully she would like parties. I would have to ask Alice to find out for me. Somehow, we had to find out about it verbally so it wasn’t freaky if we randomly threw her a birthday party on her actual birthday.

As I went through the school day, I listened as the boys chose girls to ask to the dance. A few were working up the courage to ask Bella but didn’t know sign language, thankfully. I couldn’t wait to get her alone again. I wanted to ask her to be my date to the Homecoming dance.

When the bell rang for lunch, I walked with Bella to the cafeteria patio area in silence, listening to her heart pounding in her chest. I moved closer to her and grinned widely as I watched the sidewalk in front of me. She wouldn’t need to buy a sad replica of my scent. I would be happy to lay with her every night to keep her dreams at bay.

Too bad I couldn’t figure out how to do that.

Bella's POV

Lunch with Rosalie was different. She was quiet and let me read, although my mind wasn’t exactly on the book since Edward had decided to join us. About half way through the period, I noticed that neither of them were eating and put my book down so that I could sign to them.

“Aren’t you hungry?” I asked as I looked first at Edward, who was sitting next to me and then to Rosalie who was sitting across from us. Rosalie had her binder open on the table in front of her, doodling on a blank page and Edward seemed content to simply sit there, drumming his long fingers on the treated wood. It felt as if his eyes were on me a lot but I refused to check because if I were wrong then I would be the one staring and that would just be embarrassing.

I watched as their eyes met before Edward’s narrowed at his sister slightly and when I looked back at her, she had the tiniest smirk playing on her lips. I raised an eyebrow at her and she spoke softly. “No. I am thirsty though. Almost parched.” She emphasized the word and for some inexplicable reason a shiver swept down my spine.

The noise that came from Edward had me gaping at him as memories and old fears came rushing to the surface. Things I’d been working hard to banish to the deepest depths of my mind for years. Goosebumps rose on my forearms and it had nothing to do with the fact that I was wearing a tee shirt in forty degree weather.

I recognized that sound.

He stood abruptly, his fingers pressing into the wood as he pushed off the table to turn and barely mumbled an ‘Excuse me’ as he fast walked away from us, disappearing into the cafeteria. Rosalie side eyed him before turning to me with a curious expression.

I shrugged as I struggled with my mind to keep control of my body. I just couldn’t break down right now. “Don’t look at me.” I signed. I didn’t know enough about boys to even hazard a guess. I picked up my book and shook it toward her slightly so she would know I was going to read again. She nodded and continued doodling in her binder. I didn’t read though. My mind was racing and I was trying desperately not to hyperventilate. Images of my worst nightmare played behind my eyes like a movie and I could feel the sweat bead on my forehead.

A buzzing - like a bumblebee - sounded and I swatted near my head without looking up from the pages of my book. Her face danced in my mind so vividly it felt as if she would come straight out of my nightmares to haunt me again. I kept up a steady stream of ‘she can’t hurt me anymore’s’ knowing she was dead but it didn’t seem to have any lasting effect. My breaths came faster and I grasped my chest with one hand as my fingers gripped the hardcover book so tightly that the blood left my fingertips.

I felt a cool hand on the back of my neck as my world seemed to tilt but I couldn’t be sure. My eyes were starting to blur and the world was getting hazy as a blackness crept in. My tormentor hovered above me in my mind with her sinister smile, her teeth and chin dripping with a silvery substance as she laughed at me. The lilt in her voice from her accent as she described in terrible detail how she murdered my mother echoed in my ears as the buzzing continued.

Wind whipped around my face and hair, the goosebumps seemed to grow larger on my arms as it felt like I was flying through the air. My head lolled backwards and hit something hard. I tried to open my eyes but they were heavy with fatigue. Edward’s wonderful scent surrounded me and a vibration against my back and shoulders had me relaxing slightly. The buzzing sound continued but my arms were too laden to raise and swat the offending bee away.

Soon the buzzing went away and I could hear voices though the words were distorted and separated. I could only hear a few words at a time.

I felt myself being settled down onto a soft, warm surface and sunk as far into it as I could. My limbs - my whole body - was cumbersome. I couldn’t seem to wake my brain or my body, no matter how hard I willed it to happen.

“...on the sofa…”

“...passed out. I didn’t know…”

“...left it alone...”

“...supposed to do…”

A cool cloth was placed on my forehead, soaking up the clammy feeling that had settled there and a chilled hand pushed strands of my hair away from my cheeks. I relished in the feel of the person’s fingers as they brushed against my skin.

“...okay? What happened?”

“...saw who hurt her…”

The buzzing noise started up again and I huffed, wishing the bee would leave me alone but thankful it hadn’t stung me yet. I laid there with my eyes closed, drinking in the cumin and vetiver scents that I had come to attribute to the handsome man that had been so nice to me the last couple of days. As the buzzing and sparse words continued, I struggled to stay conscious but it seemed as if it was to no avail.

“...who it was, Edwa…”

“...Ria…”

“Fuck!”

The next thing I know, I’m being brought out of the thick black fog by a voice that I would recognize anywhere.

Edward’s POV

Rosalie had something up her sleeve, I just knew it and when Bella’s mind opened up with images of the hispanic demon, caused by recognizing the sound of my growl, I knew I had to get out of the way. Rosalie was yelling at me in her mind to walk away but stay within a certain distance. I didn’t understand and I was so upset that we had inadvertently caused this flood of thoughts to invade Bella’s mind.

When Bella started hyperventilating, Rosalie spoke low and fast telling me to pay attention to her thoughts but I didn’t need to be told. My mind was constantly on Bella and whenever she was around, I was locked in on her thoughts like a homing missile. Just before she passed out, the last and most frightening image of all faded with her consciousness and I had to struggle not to tear apart the entire cafeteria of puny, irrelevant children in order to get to her.

Long, raven colored hair blew in the wind behind a hispanic female vampire. Her ruby lips were curled back menacingly as she glared down on my mate with a sickly smile. The combination of narrowed, angry eyes and that venom dripping smile made even my stomach turn. Her laugh echoed in both Bella’s and my thoughts.

Rosalie caught Bella just as her limp body slumped backwards off of the picnic table bench. One hand on the back of her neck, the opposite arm scooping her up, she directed me to call Carlisle and have Bella released. Charlie was to be called and told that she didn’t feel well and that Rosalie offered to take her to their doctor father. After I had called my father and was assured that he was calling Bella’s father, I joined Rosalie in the run toward our home. I easily and carefully pulled Bella from my sister’s arms and held her close to me while I purred to try and comfort her, her head lolling back onto my shoulder.

It didn’t take us long to speed through the forest from the school to the house. My volvo would need to be picked up before the end of school so that no one would be suspicious as to why it was there but I was not. The front door was opened and Esme was waiting for me, the rest of the family huddled behind her back as the guys tried to get their first peek at the beautiful human that had captured my heart. Alice’s eyes were worried but her mind was telling me this was all part of the plan.

I would be having words with her later. She could know the future and direct my life and the rest of our lives with fashion and money but when it came to the wellbeing of a human, my human mate, she needed to keep me informed if something like this was supposed to happen ‘for the greater good.’ This could have been avoided or done at a later date so that we didn’t risk exposure. Any number of ways we could have kept Isabella from passing out and discovering the truth but no, Alice couldn’t just let me know. I had to be kept in the dark again.

The tiny female’s eyes landed on mine as I carried my Bella through the foyer and into the sunken living room, stepping down the single stair and awaiting orders from Esme as she flitted about, gathering blankets and pillows. She even went so far as to throw a fleece into the dryer because we don’t usually turn the heat on. Rosalie fumbled with the thermostat and cranked the heat up to eighty so it would warm the house quickly. Alice tried to speak to me though my thoughts but I shook my head, careful not to growl my anger at her with Bella in my arms. My eyes were livid, I could tell and Alice retreated a step.

Esme directed me to lay Bella on the living room sofa and as I did so, a contented sigh left my mate’s lips though I could tell by her thoughts she was having difficulty doing any moving of any kind. Any other time, the thought of our speaking at vampire speed sounding like a buzzing bee would make me chuckle but there was nothing happy about this situation at all.

The entire family was gathered around Bella while I paced agitatedly along the length of the sofa.

“I’m sorry, she passed out. I didn’t know what else to do!” Rosalie said as she sat on the edge of the recliner, closest to Bella’s head.

Jasper gave us both a reproving look. “You could have just left it alone.” He didn’t like the idea of a human being near us. His throat was already burning with the need to feed and I warned him with my eyes. He would never harm my mate.

Alice tsked as she tapped her mate on the nose.

Rosalie scoffed. “She’s his mate, Jasper. What was I supposed to do, just walk away!?” Jasper shook his head, exasperated but knowing he wasn’t going to get anywhere.

I motioned with my hands for everyone to tone it down some and they started talking at vampire speed again. Esme sat on the edge of the sofa cushion to rub Bella’s forehead with a washcloth, hoping to soothe some of her discomfort.

“Alright, let’s just take a breath. Edward, what do we know? Do you know what happened?” Carlisle asked me, moving around the sofa to stand next to me as he checked Bella’s vitals from afar. It was easy to do so with our enhanced senses.

I continued pacing as my inner vampire rattled his cage. He wanted to hunt down the tormentor just to make sure she really was dead. Raking my fingers through my hair, I spoke angrily. “Rosalie taunted her…” I threw a disparaging look at both Rosalie and Alice, knowing they both had to have planned this, “...and it seemed to open a flood of thoughts. I know who hurt her. I know who forced my mate to go mute.” I growled the last words and had to stop myself from smashing my fist into the wall on my way by.

Carlisle placed a hand on my shoulder as Jasper appeared in front of me. “Do you recognize who it was, Edward?” Ever the vigilant military man, Jasper may not be all in for me having a human mate, but he was all about protecting anyone who was dear to any of us.

I hadn’t told my family that I had indeed recognized who was in Bella’s nightmare except Rosalie this morning on the way to school.

I could see my face through Jasper’s eyes. My hair was disheveled and my eyes were like two black sunken holes, my lips pulled down and thinned with my anger. I spat the name as if it were acid.

“Maria.” My voice raised at the end of the word and it echoed in Bella’s mind.

“Fuck!” Jasper ran his hand through his hair and back over his head, fluffing the honey blonde curls before he spun on his heels and raced up to his study to fetch his cell phone.

The growls that filled the house didn’t even cause Bella to twitch, the noise didn’t echo in her mind. I knew she had passed out again and I was worried for her wellbeing.

Jasper appeared again as Esme continued to look after Bella and the rest of us headed out the back door into the backyard to the gazebo.

“What are we supposed to do? How do we fix this? She really messed her up, Jas.” Alice’s eyes were wide and filled with venom as her heart broke for my sweet girl. My anger for the tiny vampire melted away just a little bit with her compassion.

Rosalie paced angrily, her fists flexing as Emmett tried to comfort her but instead of accepting his embrace, she growled and shook him off. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the beam of the gazebo. So far, he hadn’t even met Bella and was against having a human brought into the fold, so he didn’t care one way or another about her yet.

“We’re going to make sure the bitch is really dead.” I said, trying like hell to keep my calm. What I really wanted to do was out of the question. I couldn’t go galavanting around the globe searching for someone who could very well be a ghost now.

“And how do you propose we do that, brother?” Emmett asked gruffly as he stared at his agitated mate.

I shot him a dark look before Carlisle stepped up beside me. “We'll figure something out.” He offered.

Jasper, who had been standing in the yard facing the forest, seemingly ignoring the rest of us, finally turned around. His face was pensive, his thoughts distorted with his time in the Southern Vampire Army with Maria as his boss. “I’m calling Peter. I think he knows something about this.” His voice was low, deep and angry.

“Why do you think that?” Carlisle asked before I had a chance.

Jasper took another moment to think back on a conversation that he and Peter had about six months ago, the last time they spoke. I growled, wondering if it did have something to do with Bella. “He took out Maria’s second hand last year and said he was on her trail. He wanted me to help but I refused. I can’t go back to her. She’s got powers that you can’t even imagine but Peter was determined to get rid of her for some reason.”

Pressing the number for Peter’s speed dial, Jasper placed the small phone on the rail of the gazebo and stood back after putting it on speakerphone. I kept my feet rooted to the floor or I knew I would bolt. Whether I would bolt back to Bella’s side or off into the land of the unknown looking for a supposed ghost, I wasn’t sure. In order to make sure I stayed still and keep the monster inside me caged, I locked my muscles and let Carlisle’s sure hand keep me grounded, honing in on Bella’s steady heartbeat only a couple yards away.

“Jasper.” Peter greeted roughly. It seemed he was still sore that his brother in arms didn’t help him when he’d been asked to.

“Hello, Peter. You’re on speaker and everyone is here.” Jasper greeted. He stood at ease as if he were in a military formation this moment. His hands together behind his back, his feet shoulder width apart as he stared at the tiny cell phone.

“Get on with it then.” Peter ordered.

“Don’t push me, Captain. You, of anyone, should understand why I couldn’t help you.” Jasper warned, a hint of the Major peeking through his usually laid back exterior.

Peter growled. “Just get on with it, Jasper.” He sneered the name of his brother and I knew it would take more than a simple phone call in order to fix whatever Jasper had damaged.

Refusing to let Peter’s attitude affect his demeanor, Jasper pushed on. “Did you end the bitch?” He demanded without further preamble.

“Yes.”

“That’s all? How, why? What happened?” Jasper asked quickly.

Peter laughed bitterly. “If you had wanted to know the answers to those questions, you would have come to my aid when I asked of you. Thanks to you, I may have gotten the bitch but I lost my charge. Do you need anything else?” He snapped loudly.

Carlisle cut in before Jasper could retort, thankfully because he looked as if he were about to blow a gasket. Alice laid a calming hand on his arm and rested her head against his chest. He wrapped her up and kissed her head as our coven leader and ‘father’ took over the conversation. “Excuse me, Peter but if I could ask a question. Who was your charge?” The coincidences were too close and added up too obviously for it to be anyone else.

Carlisle’s smooth, calming voice seemed to lull Peter into security because you could practically feel the tension melt from the air for just a moment, even though he was hundreds of miles away and on a phone.

The tension in the area thickened quickly as he uttered his next words.

“Isabella Marie Swan.”

Each of us stood stock still, completely stunned to silence until suddenly a voice spoke from the doorway of the house, and I literally almost fainted.

“Peter?”

Her voice was barely more than a whisper and I was surprised that Peter himself heard but hear he did. His breath hitched and it seemed as though he was trying not to sob. Dragging in a huge lungful of air, his voice shook.

“Bells? Is that you, Bells?”

Suddenly the yard was alive with activity as Esme rushed to Bella’s side and I forgot she didn’t know that I was a vampire as I blurred across the yard to stand in front of her. She didn’t even startle as I cupped her face in my hands, also forgetting that we hadn’t touched intimately before. Her wide golden brown eyes stared at me and darted back to the gazebo where the phone lay.

“Bells? Answer me, sweetheart. I know you can do it. Talk to me.” Peter cooed, his thick southern voice getting closer as Jasper carried the cell phone and placed it in Bella’s open palm.

Her breathing was erratic and I was concerned she may pass out again so I reluctantly took my hands from her face and helped her sit down right where she was in the doorway as Esme brought a patio chair over for her. Emmett brought out the large fleece blanket that had been in the dryer and laid it gently over her body and Rosalie appeared with a warm mug of tea. Bella barely acknowledged any of the activity around her as she stared at the phone.

“Peter?” She whispered again, brokenly. Tears formed in her eyes and started to crawl down her cheeks, making my heart break. I squatted in front of her, my knees on either side of her legs.

“Oh, sweetheart. Do you want me to come to you? I can be there in four hours.” Peter asked softly.

I wanted to growl possessively but realized that wouldn’t be best in this situation, cutting it off quickly. He had helped my mate somehow, someway and she only spoke for him. It was mind boggling to me and I struggled to keep my mouth shut. Alice looked at me approvingly and nodded her head. I nodded back, accepting that I needed to keep up whatever it was that I was doing. She may be taking this situation too far, but in all reality, Alice has never steered the family wrong and only tried to do what was best for us all.

“Please.”

The sad, broken word echoed in my head over and over as I stayed crouched in front of my mate and held her hand with one of mine and wiped her tears away with the other.


	5. Letting it Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter contains references to rape (not graphic). It also contains horror/gore. Please be advised.

I groggily stood up from a very comfortable denim blue sofa corded in white after letting myself adjust to my new surroundings, looking around and seeing no one. My wobbly legs took a moment to settle and stiffen so that I could walk safely. I had meant to investigate where I was when I heard loud voices from outside the open back door.

Carefully walking up the only stair out of the sunken living room of the most beautiful home I had ever been in, I pressed a hand to my head as a wave of dizziness got to me. I was always a little disoriented when I woke up from fainting. It didn’t happen often but when it did, it was usually a doozy.

The moment my foot touched the doorway that overlooked a beautifully landscaped backyard, a voice I never thought I’d hear again spoke my name. My breath caught in my throat as memories assaulted me. Peter was the only man I had spoken for at all in the last eight years. He was my closest ally, my confidant, my best friend aside from Jacob.

He saved my life.

“Peter?” The whisper that slipped from my lips was broken. I didn’t dare actually speak. There were too many people around. Including a few I had never met and it made me nervous. I honed in on where I could see a small phone lying on the rail of a large wooden gazebo. I could feel Edward’s eyes on me but I couldn’t think of anything other than Peter.

The way he spoke my name broke my heart and I felt my body go weak just as Edward appeared in front of me, cupping my face and helping me to sit into a chair that materialized as equally fast as Edward had. I was used to strange circumstances happening around me with everything I had been through so I didn’t even flinch.

A large bear of a man with thick brows and a grimace fluffed a warm thick blanket over my body as I stared at the now moving cell phone. A tall, lean blonde man placed the device into my hand without looking at me and I kept my eyes locked on it as if it held all the secrets in the world. Peter kept talking but I could barely make out the words as his tone pierced my heart. He sounded as broken as I felt, though I thought I could hear a smidge of relief in his voice. My brain was moving as slow as sludge as I tried to think of what to say.

I repeated his name, just as brokenly as the tears started to fall. I wanted him here. I needed him here. Charlie would be so happy to see him.

“Oh sweetheart. Do you want me to come to you? I can be there in four hours.” He offered quietly, a pleading note in his tone and my chest constricted painfully.

I could only say one thing before the sobs finally climbed out of me. “Please.”

The phone was snatched from my hand and I let it fall into my lap limply, feeling very tired despite the fact that I’d been asleep for Lord knows how long. I watched as a handsome golden blonde haired man with kind eyes spoke quietly into the phone before ending the call. He smiled at me before turning away and walking into the house behind me.

Edward was immediately wiping the tears from my eyes as he looked on with such agony, I felt like I would crumble to bits right there. He wrapped me in his arms and I clung to him. I heard the buzzing of the bumble bee again and snuggled into him, hoping he would keep me from being stung. His chest moved as if he were chuckling and I pulled away to look at him curiously. What could possibly be funny right now?

“There’s no bumble bee, Bella. It’s just us talking too fast for you to recognize the words. I’d never heard it put that way before and it made me chuckle, I’m sorry.” He said with a small smile on his beautiful face. I looked at him perplexed. Had I said that out loud? It’s been ages since I’d accidentally spoken, aside from the two incidences of noises coming from my mouth without my permission the last couple days.

Edward furrowed his brows, seemingly contemplating something before risking a glance at Rosalie, who nodded her head encouragingly. I was getting more and more confused.

I wriggled backwards out of Edward’s hug to sit in the chair so that I could sign. “What’s going on?” I asked.

“Nothing dear, let’s get you inside so you can rest.” A soft voice said behind me. Her shoulder length hair was the color of Werther’s Candies and she had a gentle look to her face. I immediately felt a kinship with this woman.

Alice rushed forward. “No it’s okay, Esme. We can tell…” Her eager voice was cut off by a now angry Edward as he stood from in front of me to his full height, puffing his chest out to seem more intimidating in his anger.

He had never looked more beautiful to me.

“You have directed this play enough, Alice.” He hissed close to her face as she leaned back. “Let Bella deal with things her own way. _Stop_. _Pushing_.”

The tall, lean blonde man who delivered the cell phone to me stepped up behind Alice and gave Edward a dark look, which he ignored. As I looked the man over, I realized I had seen him before. The black eyes lit with warning, the honey blonde curls that hung to just under his ears, the sharp point to his chin, and the straight military lines of his body.

I gasped in a breath in my shock and pointed at him with a trembling finger. I was instantly filled with terror when those black eyes turned to look at me. Eyes that were filled with horror. My mouth gaped open and closed like a fish out of water but I didn’t dare speak.

The God of _fucking_ War was in front of me.

I felt my eyes roll into the back of my head and just before the blackness descended once again, I felt myself being lifted and taken away from the shouting voices.

When I awoke again, I was in yet another room inside the beautiful house. Without lifting my head, I assessed my surroundings. The stark white ceilings and golden hued walls were glowing softly from two lamps, a wall of glass was behind me and a wall of bookshelves filled with music and books was to my left. At the foot of the couch I was lying on was the doorway to a hall but I couldn’t see much else there. I let my head loll to the right and my eyes widened as I took in Edward lying next to me. He was a respectable distance away from me, lying against the golden wall comfortably as he looked down at me with a small smile. His fingertips danced gently in the ends of my hair. No one else was around and the house was quiet.

“How are you feeling, Bella?” He asked me. His voice would never fail to make me weak at the knees. At least I was lying down as he said my name this time. The way the word rolled off his tongue just melted my bones. Too bad he wasn’t holding me to keep me together. As soon as the thought was finished processing in my head, his arms were around me and I was pulled tightly into his hard, defined chest. I breathed him in and snuggled against him.

I really didn’t want to move to talk to him but I refused to speak aloud. I just couldn’t do it. I knew I needed to get over the fear but I just didn’t know how. Peter was the only one who could coax me to talk and I had no idea how he did it. I was no Chatty Cathy around Peter but I at least used words once in awhile. I felt like I could trust Edward, trust him with my voice, with my words and my heart but how could I be sure? I had only known him for a couple of days. I had so many questions. Were they like my tormentors and Peter? They felt like it, they kind of looked like it but the golden eyes really set me off. Maybe they wore contacts so they could fit in at school better. I couldn’t imagine red eyes being a good idea in high school, no matter how eccentric you were.

“You can talk to me, Bella. You can trust me. I promise I’ll always be here for you.” His whispered words penetrated my thoughts and I looked up at him without moving my cheek from his chest. He looked down at me and when our eyes met and I saw the swirling colors of ocher and onyx, I just knew that he and Peter were one and the same. He wasn't wearing contacts at all. I still didn’t know what they were, but I definitely knew they weren’t human. Bringing my ear to his chest, I listened - just like I had with Peter once before - for a heartbeat. My own heart sped up as I realized Edward also didn’t have a heartbeat, just like Peter...Just like my tormentors.

“How did you know that Jasper was the God of War, Bella?” Edward whispered and I tensed. How could he possibly know that? I _know_ I didn’t say that out loud. Stroking his hand over my forehead and down the length of my back as he held me to him, almost desperately as if he was afraid I would disappear, he continued. “No, you didn’t speak aloud. You thought it just before you passed out.”

I stilled, my breath hitching painfully, and I shut my eyes tightly. _She_ could do strange things as well. _She_ could change her appearance to look like other people. _She_ could slither into your mind and alter your thoughts like a slippery snake, infecting your brain with her poison. Could Edward do freaky things as well? Could he hurt my mind? Would he? No. I refused to believe that. I may not have known him long but I knew he wasn’t out to get me. He had been chivalrous and sweet, kind and gentlemanly.

Slowly, I brought my eyes to his, my head tilting back against his forearm. He looked pained as if what I was thinking was hurting him.

Crap.

“ _You can hear my thoughts can’t you?_ ” I thought.

He closed his eyes briefly and inhaled before nodding. His eyes peeked opened, gauging my reaction before sighing. “Yes, I can.”

The silence stretched for several minutes as we continued staring at each other. Holy crow, that means he’s been able to hear everything I’ve ever thought about him, everything I’ve ever thought in his presence! Oh my good friggin’ God. I could feel the heat flood my face but didn’t tear my eyes from Edward’s. I tried to push my embarrassment away but Jesus, I’ve thought of him in so many different ways and not all of them were ladylike. I felt mortified with myself, though I knew rationally that it wasn’t my fault that he could read my mind.

“Don't be embarrassed. It's flattering, what you think of me." He started. "You really don’t know what we are?” He asked me timidly. He seemed to be afraid that I would find out.

I shook my head, glad for the distraction from the fact that he could hear my innermost private monologues. If I thought about it rationally for just a moment, with the fact that I couldn’t talk...wouldn’t talk...it kind of comes in handy that he can read my thoughts. I don’t have to speak to him.

“I would love to hear your voice someday though.” He whispered sheepishly.

“ _Can you answer a few questions for me please?_ ” God this was so weird, literally asking this man questions in my head and I felt silly.

“Ask me anything you like, Bella.” He chuckled as he kissed the top of my head.

With that move, I realized how intimately we were lying and I pushed against his chest to move back slightly. It was extremely uncomfortable for me as I’d only ever cuddled up with my best friends. I wasn’t sure what Edward was yet but he didn’t feel like a best friend to me. I pushed those thoughts away quickly, recognizing that the emotions playing across his face was from hearing my thoughts. I asked him questions in quick succession in my mind.

“ _What time is it? Where’s Charlie, he needs to be here. When will Peter be here? What are you? What’s going on? Where are we?_ ” I obviously knew we were in his house but where exactly was that? How long had I been away from school? Charlie was going to freak. I scrambled to get up off the couch and Edward let me, albeit, reluctantly. I found my backpack in the corner of his room at the end of the couch and rummaged through the pockets for my cell phone. As I was pulling it out, Edward answered my questions as he came to stand beside me.

“It’s almost one thirty, your father has been called and knows you’re here and safe. He’s coming over and wants you to text him as soon as you can. Peter will be here in about three and a half hours now...If you really want to know what I am, I will tell you. Yes, we are in my house and we live in Forks, just on the edge of town off the One-oh-One.” He spoke softly, his voice deep and comforting as his hand rubbed circles on my back as I stared at my dead cell phone. Wordlessly handing me a phone charger, Edward smirked when I looked at him.

“ _Peter’s coming? You promise?_ ” I hadn’t missed the slight sneer of my friend’s name when Edward spoke it but I couldn’t think on that now. That wasn’t important. What was important was that Peter was coming and Charlie would be here and Charlie could finally see Peter again and all my air was leaving my lungs as I tried to think on how this would go.

Edward swept me backwards and sat me on his lap on the black leather sofa again, soothing me with his words, his face in the crook of my neck, seeming to drink in the smell of my skin. Too bad I didn’t shower this morning. Edward chuckled.

“You smell divine, love.” He said with a smile in his voice that I could also feel against my neck.

The nickname warmed me inexplicably and I smiled goofily, finally relaxing for the first time in hours. Peter was coming, Charlie was coming, and Edward was here.

My smile faded as I remembered why I was in this room to begin with. “ _Why is the God of War in your house, Edward?_ ” My inner voice was timid, scared and my fingers started to tremble. Peter had told me stories of the famous Ares, _she_ had gloated about how he would tear me apart slowly, limb from limb after she made me like _her_.

“Woah, Bella, stop please.” Edward cooed and I realized I was breathing heavily again. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath through my nose before letting it out of my mouth. “You’re thoughts are all over the place. Just breathe. Talk to me, I’ll help you the best I can.” He said.

I nodded and gathered my wits about me, scooching off his lap and settling beside him on the sofa. I fiddled with my fingers until Edward’s cool hand wrapped around mine, grounding me. I smiled at him from under my lashes and started my inner monologue. It felt weird to talk to someone without my words or my hands.

“ _Might as well start at the beginning. When I was ten, I had just gotten back from here, visiting with my dad and Mom was picking me up from the airport. When we got home, the door was broken and my mom’s boyfriend, Phil was lying in his own blood across the dining room table._ ” I took a deep breath and Edward turned to face me, one leg spread out behind me and the other on the floor. He kept his hands on mine. “She _was there, covered in blood and laughing at the horrible sounds my mom made as she cried over Phil. I just stood there, staring. I didn’t know what to do or what to think. Before I took another step, my mom was wrenched up_.” I had to stop for a moment because my thoughts started getting disjointed as the sobs I was trying to contain burst through my mouth.

Edward hugged me to him, sliding me across the sofa into the curve of his body and pulling my legs over one of his. His other leg wrapped around my hips and it almost felt as if he were a spider monkey clinging to the side of me. My arms wrapped around his right arm as I laid my head on his chest, his left hand stroking my hair as he kissed the crown of my head. He let me sob until I was able to think clearly.

“ _She...she tossed my mother across the room and she landed in the china cabinet Grandma Marie had given to us. The glass broke and Mom was bleeding from her face and arms and the bitch laughed! She laughed as if we were playing a great game. She just kept picking up my mom and tossing her around the room, keeping her eyes on me while I just stood there like an idiot. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t wipe the tears from my eyes or even yell for her to stop. I didn’t do anything. I just stood there!_ ” My inner voice was practically yelling as Edward held me to him, tears streaming down my face.

A steady growl reverberated through his entire being and instead of being afraid, like I was of _her_ , I was soothed. I pushed my body into his further, needing his comfort.

“ _She ended up tearing my mom’s throat out and placing her on Phil’s body as if they were hugging and sleeping...There was so much blood!_ ”

For long minutes, I let my mind drift over the images of my mother being thrown like a rag doll, the broken glass, the empty look in her eyes as the life left her. The sight of the red eyed bitch who killed my family and tormented me for years after was forever burned into my brain. Edward never stopped stroking my hair and making that vibrating noise in his chest.

“When you’re ready, please tell me more. It will be good to get it out. I want to help you heal, Bella.” He whispered.

I sighed, knowing that was exactly what Tiffany would tell me but at least I wouldn’t be telling a complete stranger. I honestly didn't think I _could_ tell a stranger these things without fear of being locked up for being dillusional. “ _I found out the next day that Maria…_ ” Even my inner voice choked on her name. “ _could shape shift. She took the look of my mother and it made me sick to look at her because I wanted to run to her and hug her as much as I wanted to burn her alive. I knew she wasn’t my mom but she looked like her...she sounded like her! She fooled everyone on the street. She even had Charlie fooled._

_When she found out I had a father who lived out of state, she threatened to hunt him down and make him miserable. More miserable than she made my mother as she was murdering her. I couldn’t let her get to him. I stopped calling him so much. I used to talk to him three times a week and I stopped calling him except for once a month. I was afraid I would slip up. The court had set up an agreement so I had to keep coming to Forks to visit my dad. Maria didn’t want to ‘kill off’ my mom so she held up to the agreement. She ended up following me at a distance to make sure I wouldn’t slip up and tell my dad everything. It was so hard_.”

This was going to be the hard part. I didn’t want to admit this to anyone. I’d done so well, I thought, to keep this evil contained in the little box inside my head but the words started flowing through my mind as my hands started signing of their own accord. Edward leaned back to accommodate me.

“ _I was left on my own most of the time but when she wasn’t there, I wasn’t allowed to leave my bedroom. There was no food, no toilet. I was in filth and starving when she suddenly would remember she needed to feed me in order to keep me alive. Unfortunately, I couldn’t even tell teachers or anyone because she had me homeschooled online and monitored everything. She only came to the house to keep appearances. When I was thirteen she didn’t come alone. There was a man with her_.”

The image of my second tormentor swept through my mind as a shudder swept through my frame. Blazing ruby eyes that held contempt and laughter as he hovered over me, his greasy brown hair falling into his eyes and mine. He was skinny to the point of starvation, much like I had been at that point. I trudged on though, knowing I needed to get this out. “ _The man didn’t waste any time. He picked me up, threw me in the tub and started dumping water on me. I cleaned myself, sobbing but he didn’t stop. The water kept going in my mouth but he wouldn’t stop. After I was clean, he set me on the floor of the bathroom. I remember the tiles were so cold but they weren’t as cold as his skin._ ”

I couldn’t keep going. I let the images speak for themselves. The man, Dominic, had hurt me, taken my most precious gift, then left me bruised, bleeding, and spread open on the floor of the bathroom. “ _Maria came in a while later and threw a loaf of bread at me with some peanut butter. She told me to make it last and then she left, locking me in the bathroom. It’s stupid, but I was thankful that she left me there instead of my room. At least I would have water and a toilet. I scrubbed myself with rubbing alcohol and drank half the bottle trying to kill myself. All that succeeded in doing was making me puke blood. That was the last time I spoke_.”

Edward’s growl got louder and I pressed my nose into his chest, breathing him in. He pressed his nose to the back of my neck, doing the same. The tears never stopped tracking down my face. Maria had tried to make me talk, tried to force me to scream and for a while, I did scream. Whenever she came she would burn me or slice my skin, laughing as she heard me scream. It wasn’t long before the screams turned to whimpers and the whimpers faded to soundless cries of agony.

“ _When I was fifteen, I ended up in the hospital where I met Peter. He had been the one to keep Maria from me. He’d been trying to get her for years, I guess. That night, Dominic got mad at me because when he came to the bathroom to take me, I spit in his face and flipped him off. He gripped my waist so hard that his fingers crushed me and I had to get my spleen and appendix removed. He threw me down the stairs and my head split open. Maria kicked him out when she saw what he’d done. That was how Peter found him. He’d been lurking around the hospital, trying to get to me and wasn’t paying attention_.”

The agony on Edward’s face made me look away. My own anguish was enough. I couldn’t handle his too.

“ _Peter helped me and after years of trying, Maria messed up and he killed her finally six months ago. He saved me and contacted Charlie._ ”

I breathed easier after telling him. Almost like it was cathartic to release all the evil from my brain. There was more, of course. My body was deformed and my inner scars would never heal, I feared. But maybe with his help, I could be kind of whole again. Edward’s gentle fingers on my chin brought me out of my mind and back to his arms. I looked up to him at his urging and his eyes were wide with concern.

“Charlie knows?” He asked softly. I nodded.

“ _He doesn’t know what Peter is, so far as I know, but he knows what I’ve been through. All the gory details. So does Billy and Jacob Black_.” I told him still using my mind and my hands. Thinking of my native best friend, I knew I would have to get ahold of him soon and find out why he was so mad. I hated when we fought and this time I had no idea what I'd done.

“If Billy Black knows then Charlie most likely knows what we are. They’ve got their legends.” He paused and took a deep breath as if bracing him for something else terrible. “Why didn’t Maria kill you? Why keep you a prisoner for all those years?” The pain in his voice and the way it cracked hurt my heart and I clasped his hands with mine, staring into his eyes a moment.

“ _I would be powerful and she wanted to use me once I turned eighteen. She wanted to end the God of War for disobeying her and for not coming back to her. She just kept going on and on about how I would be her most powerful weapon. The Goddess of Destruction._ ”

Shortly after my confession to Edward, he led me into his en suite bathroom and left me in peace so that I could clean up. I used his brush to fix my hair and splashed cold water on my face before bracing my hands on the countertop. I completely ignored the pristine bathroom around me, staring into my bloodshot eyes in the mirror.

That really took a lot out of me. My head was throbbing between my eyes and my throat was scratchy. I went out to my backpack and grabbed a bottle of headache medicine, popping two and swallowing them dry. Unplugging my phone from where Edward had it charging, I booted it up and texted Charlie that I was with Rosalie and her family and I would see him soon. He texted back immediately and asked how I was feeling and I told him I was fine and that I would explain once he was down here.

Pocketing the phone, I walked to the doorway of the bedroom and was met by Edward who smiled at me graciously and held his arm out for me. I looped mine into his and we descended a wide white spiral staircase, slowly.

“Esme made you some soup, if you’d like.” He told me as we reached the last step.

“ _Whose Esme?_ ” I asked without my hands. If his entire family was as good at ASL as he and his sisters were then this mind reading thing really would come in handy.

“She’s my mother, for all intents and purposes.” He answered me with a fond smile as the woman herself appeared in front of me holding a small cup on a saucer that was filled with the intoxicating smell of broccoli chowder.

“It smells good. Thank you, Esme.” I signed to her and the smile she gave me lit up the room. I smiled back at her winningly and accepted the cup as she showed me to the large dining room table. I sat down with Edward’s hand on my elbow assisting me and he sat in the chair to my left. “Aren’t you hungry?” I asked him, signing so that I wasn’t rude to Esme.

“No. I don’t eat.” He said with a secretive smirk.

My eyebrows shot up at this remark and I cocked my head. “Ever?”

“Never.” His lips curled up so enticingly that I found myself turning away with a blush.

He probably found me disgusting. Everything that’s been done to me, I would be disgusted with me too. My body was…

“Stop that.” He said firmly with a grimace. “You have no idea what I think.”

I kept my eyes on my soup, which was delicious and I told Esme so, and realized he was right. I don’t know what he thinks of me or what he thinks of anything else. I can’t read his mind like he can read mine. The thought made me frown. It would take some getting used to, knowing he could hear everything in my brain but it’s not like I can just turn it off. Edward was silent, sneaking glances at me every couple of minutes but I didn’t want to anger him anymore than I already had.

When Esme swept in and took the empty cup away, I leaned back in my chair, wondering what was going to happen next. I didn’t have to wonder long. Rosalie flopped gracefully into the chair on my right and took my hand in hers.

“Bella, I’d like to introduce you to the rest of my family.” She gave Edward a look - I’m assuming because he hadn’t done so yet - and then captured my attention again. “Come with me. You’ll love everyone.” She sounded so confident but I wasn’t so sure.

I didn’t have much of a choice but to follow Rosalie as she stood from the table and kept ahold of my hand. Risking a look back at Edward and seeing him standing to follow us, I gave him a small encouraging smile. I felt bad for making him angry and hoped he wouldn’t stay that way for long. He shook his head and gave me a small smile back. Zipping to my side, he clasped my other hand and leaned down to breathe into my ear as we continued walking.

“I wasn’t mad at you, love. I just don’t want you thinking like that. You’re perfect the way you are.” He sounded so earnest and honest that I stopped, Rosalie continuing on for a step before realizing I wasn’t following. She stopped and waited patiently, watching her brother and I.

“ _What?_ ” I asked in my head as I stared at him. I didn’t believe that I was perfect. I was far from perfect. Deformed and disgusting. Edward’s growl cut off my train of thought and I blushed as he shook his head.

“You are none of those things, Bella. You’re perfect to me. Every part of you.” He spoke so reverently that I almost believed him.

Then I remembered that he hadn’t seen me without my clothes on. He probably never would. I didn’t have any qualms with my body on my own. It was mine and I’d been through hell but to show it off to a man, any man, let alone this one who seemed to be grabbing my heart and hanging on for dear life? I wasn’t sure I could survive it if he saw how I looked and I saw the disgust in his eyes.

He dropped my hand and quickly cupped my face between his palms, bringing his nose to mine. I felt Rosalie slip her fingers from mine with a huff but I couldn’t pay attention to her at the moment. The enticing scents of this man washed over me as his nose touched mine, his eyes practically burning gold as he stared wide eyed into mine.

“You, my mate, are the most gorgeous creature I have ever laid eyes on. Not Rosalie, not an angel herself, could compare to you in my eyes. You are the only one for me, Bella Swan and I know that no matter what your skin looks like underneath clothes, you will always be the most beautiful person in the entire world.” He breathed quietly and my face flushed bright red. His words pierced my soul and my eyes filled with happy tears. This declaration seemed strong and fast but I’d noticed with these people that it just happened that way. Everything with them seemed to happen strong and fast. I’d never heard the word mate in association with them before though- only with animals - so I was a bit confused but pushed it aside for the moment.

I couldn’t do anything except what felt right. I pursed my lips and pressed them to Edward’s. His eyes widened and I almost pulled away but before I could his arms wrapped around my body and he pulled me flush against his chest, deepening the kiss as our eyes drifted closed. His fingers tangled into my hair behind my ears. We didn’t use our tongues just a gentle yet desperate play of lips, his cool - mine warm. He pulled back before I did and I realized I needed air. I greedily inhaled his scent as I smiled at him like a loon.

That was my first kiss.

Suddenly, Edward looked bashful and ran a hand through his hair.

“What’s wrong?” I signed to him, looking at him curiously.

Giving me a sheepish smile, he spoke in hushed tones. “That was my first kiss, also.”

I gaped at him for a moment while a flood of happiness and warmth expanded from my chest, through my body, and out to my fingertips and toes. The smile on my face must have been goofy. This beautiful man had never been kissed by another woman and he had let me kiss him. Plain, damaged me. I felt honored to my core.

Rosalie huffed again and tapped her heeled toes on the hardwood flooring near us and I turned to look at her. “Can we get going now?” She asked impatiently but the smile she wore on her face told me that she wasn’t upset. She looked genuinely happy for me. Or maybe it was her brother she was happy for but either way I liked seeing her smile. For some reason, I felt like I was lucky that she didn’t take offense to Edward’s intimate declaration.

“One more moment, please Rosalie.” Edward requested without taking his burning eyes off of mine. He stepped close to me again and his hands found mine, his thumbs grazing across my knuckles. “I’m falling for you quickly, Bella.” He whispered. “I’m actually quite certain that I’m already in love with you. You thought it yourself, when something happens with...my kind...it’s strong and fast. I am not sure that I can ever let you go.”

The vulnerability in his gaze stunned me for a moment and my mind went blank. When I regained my mental faculties, I blinked once before making a decision.

I pulled my hands from his and stepped back, ignoring the strangled noise that left Rosalie’s throat as she looked on and the flash of hurt that darted over Edward’s face. Lifting my hands in front of myself, I signed something I had never signed before in my entire life.

“Then don't. Will you be my boyfriend?” I was being more brazen than I felt but I was confident that this was something we needed. Maybe it would seem fast to everyone else but to us it felt right.

Edward seemed to sag with relief as a brilliant smile lit up his face, a startled laugh leaving his lips. “Of course, my Bella. Yes, I’d love nothing more than to be your boyfriend.” He seemed to shine from the inside out and I smiled just as widely as he did.

“Okay, okay let’s go. I want my family to meet you and now that it’s finally official, we can introduce this new development as well!” Rosalie stated as she clasped my hand again and practically yanked me across the dining room and down the step into the sunken living room where the rest of the Cullens and Hales were draped across various pieces of furniture.

One man stood as we came into sight and offered me his seat on a single overstuffed chair that matched the sofa I had woken up on and I walked over to it, sinking into the cushions contentedly. This was the single most comfortable piece of furniture I had ever plopped my rear end on. Edward sat on the arm of the chair next to me and Rosalie sat gingerly next to the large bear of a man with dark curls. At least this time he wasn’t grimacing. She linked her long, slender fingers with his thick ones and leaned back into the loveseat, smiling at me.

“Bella, my name is Carlisle Cullen and I’d like to welcome you to our home.” This was the same man who had spoken to Peter earlier. His golden blonde hair shimmered in the lighting from the lamps and his smile was kind. “This lovely lady here is Esme, my wife.” His words softened as did his eyes as he looked down and held his hand out for his wife, the beautiful caramel haired woman whom I’d felt an immediate kinship with. I smiled at them both.

“It’s nice to meet you.” I signed happily. Edward leaned back so he was reclined against the side of the chair and draped his arm across the back, his fingers toying with thick strands of my hair.

Esme sat down and Carlisle pointed to Rosalie. “You already know my daughter, Rosalie. Next to her is her husband, Emmett.” My eyes widened. _Husband_? Woah. That seemed a bit extreme for a high school senior. Edward chuckled and leaned down to breathe into my ear.

“They’ve been together for over seventy years, Bella. It’s only natural they would marry somewhere in that time.” The laugh in his voice didn’t stop me from choking on the air in the room.

_Seventy years_? Holy crow.

Rosalie laughed at - I’m assuming - the look on my face. “We’ve been around a long time.” She said.

I signed to her as I nodded my head. “I’d say so.”

Emmett smiled widely at me as he waved, displaying his deep dimples and childlike grin. He looked more like a teddy bear now than an angry grizzly and I liked that look better on him. He was a pretty intimidating man with all his bulging muscles. I nodded at him and signed that it was nice to meet him. He signed back as well and I was happy that everyone here seemed to be fluent in the language.

Continuing on, Carlisle turned to the sofa I had woken up on where Alice sat next to the God of War. Her tiny legs were draped over both of his as he sat straight in his seat keeping his eyes trained on the glass coffee table in front of him. His hands were held tightly together on Alice’s thighs and he looked extremely uncomfortable. Alice was looking relaxed in a pair of black leggings and a long gray knit sweater. Her hair wasn’t spiked today and I thought it looked adorable the way the strands tickled her cheeks as she moved. Her feet were bare and I noticed she had the teeniest toes I’d ever seen. Weirdly enough, I found myself wanting to lean forward and tickle them.

Alice suddenly laughed out loud and wriggled her toes before pulling herself off of the blonde and skipping the few steps over to me to kiss me on the cheek. Her actions shocked me and I stared at her a moment before looking around awkwardly. She walked more sedately over to the God of War and grabbed his hand in hers, his fingers wrapping around her small hand and almost engulfing it. She pulled him up and though he followed, he kept his head down as she pulled him over to stand in front of me.

I was frozen in fear. What was going on? Why was she bringing this monster over to me? I could feel my lungs tightening in my chest as I tried to get enough breath inside me. Terror had me frozen, eyes wide as I stared at his face. Edward clasped a hand over my shoulder and pulled me to his side and I let my body fall against him stiffly.

“Easy, Alice.” He warned her softly as his fingers massaged my tense shoulder lightly.

Alice nodded as she crouched in front of me, her voice was soft and sweet as she looked me in my eyes. She tried to grab my hand but I pulled away quickly. “Bella sweetie, I don’t know what all that monster told you about my Jas, but I promise you he will not hurt you. Yes, he was known as the God of War and yes, he’s done some terrible things but he is not that man anymore.” The soothing sounds of her voice almost lulled me into a sense of security but I pushed against it.

Eight years of threats and torment ingrained into me that I could not trust that easily.

Jasper kept his eyes on his feet and I wasn’t sure if it was to pacify me or because he was uneasy with my reaction to him. Maria had portrayed him as a monster. If he was different than that man then I was definitely being rude but how was I to know? I’d never had an image in my mind to go with her words before I’d been rescued. When Peter had rescued me, he proudly showed me a picture of his ‘Major’, stating he was the most feared man to ever live known as the God of War, I’d started hyperventilating and Peter had had a fainting girl on his hands. He’d most definitely been out of his depth.

Alice continued staring at me, seemingly trying to soothe me as her tiny fingers fidgeted with the white cord on the chair cushion. Edward’s fingers danced over my collarbone and I relaxed into him. Rosalie and Emmett watched with morbid fascination, possibly wondering if I was going to faint or scream. Esme’s face wore compassion and Carlisle stood passively, regarding me carefully. My eyes met Alice’s again and I finally let her expression soothe me. She looked like she could cry if I didn’t accept the man behind her and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. I would have to deal with my own insecurities and demons another time.

Edward squeezed my shoulder and smoothed his hand down my upper arm before pressing a kiss to my hair. I looked at him and gave him a timid smile, still unsure of how this would go, but I hoped to hell that Jasper would not tear me apart like Maria had promised.

Inhaling a large breath, I lifted my hands from my lap and signed ‘Okay’ to Alice. The smile on her face was blinding and I found myself returning it involuntarily. She stood up fluidly, pressed another kiss to my cheek, stood behind Jasper and placed her tiny hands on his waist. Rosalie and Emmett along with Esme and Carlisle all seemed to relax as the atmosphere in the house changed.

In careful measures, I lifted my eyes from Alice’s and followed the line of Jasper’s arm to his neck, his chin and nose, until I met his eyes...or tried to. He kept his eyes down, avoiding mine completely. I didn’t want to make any sudden moves so I slowly brought my hands from my lap into the air so that I could sign to the infamous Ares.

“Hello Jasper.” I said, ducking my head to try and catch his eye. As slowly as I had moved, Jasper raised his eyes to mine. The golden hue of his gaze put me at immediate ease and I gave him a very small smile. The God of War had red blazing eyes, filled with hatred. These ocher eyes were filled with remorse and hurt. I had a strange urge to hug this man that Peter had gone on and on about for three straight days trying to convince me that he was not the man Maria threatened me with. Unfortunately for him, my nightmares had been stronger than his words of reassurance.

“Hello Bella.” His voice, belying his eyes, was self assured and strong, clear and enticing. The timber held a decadence that could be amazing in song. I smiled a little wider and waved.

Alice gripped his waist a little tighter I could tell by the way the fabric of his chocolate cotton shirt moved and stretched. She whispered something in his ear and he turned his face to look at her. She pecked his lips and sat back down on the sofa behind her. Jasper’s shoulders relaxed more and he sat on the coffee table in front of me leaning forward to settle his elbows on his knees as he regarded me.

“Can I tell you about myself, Bella? The real me?” He asked me quietly. I didn’t know if he just didn’t want to bother signing or if he didn’t know the language. Maybe he figured that since I could hear that it would be a waste of time. Either way, it didn’t bother me.

“I’ve heard some things from Peter but if you don’t mind, I would love to know you.” I signed to him with a smile. Peter had told me of the fun they’d had, trying to convince me. He had told me of the hunting games they would play at first until I had lost my McDonald’s all over the interior of his brand new Dodge truck. He grumbled about weak human stomachs good naturedly as he cleaned it up then blessedly refused to tell me more about their more...gruesome games.

Edward growled lowly every time I thought about Peter and I looked over at him and squeezed his knee. He had nothing to worry about.

Everyone settled in for the storytime as Carlisle sat next to Esme and took her hand in his and she snuggled into his side. Emmett pulled Rosalie onto his lap and pressed a kiss to her neck. Edward slipped from the arm of the chair into the cushion with me and pressed me into his side. I loved the feel of his body against mine. He made me feel safer than I’d ever felt. Alice sat back with a self satisfied smirk on her face as Jasper started his story.

He told me about his human life, growing up on a farm and then enlisting in the Civil War before he was of age. He described how he flew through the ranks and was promoted to Major just before the evacuation of Galveston, Texas. When he told me about Maria and her depravity, I shuddered in fear and his face softened. He reached his hand forward in what I felt would have been reassurance but a soft growl from beside me had him pulling his hand back. I gave Edward a reproving look and leaned forward to grasp Jasper’s hand, squeezing it for a second before I let go and settled back into the chair.

Jasper went on to describe his gift for empathy and I realized that was why he looked so horrified when I’d pointed at him. He had felt my recognition. He told me about Peter and a newborn named Charlotte who Peter had wanted to save but Maria had destroyed her before Jasper could make a move to save her. Thankfully, she hadn’t been Peter’s true mate - whatever that was - just someone who he had connected with on a deep level or Peter probably wouldn’t exist today. He was careful to dance around the subject of what their kind was, though with all the hunting stories and blood gore, I could assume. I felt Edward tense beside me when I thought that.

When Jasper told me about aiding in Peter’s escape and then Peter coming back for him only a few years later, they had traveled the world trying to find their mates. Jasper had the fortune of meeting his on a rainy evening in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and though Peter had been invited to join them, he declined and disappeared. The two had kept in contact constantly but had a falling out six months ago when Peter tried to get Jasper to help him.

I understood both sides but it still irked me that Jasper wouldn’t drop everything for someone who had helped him escape a hell worse than death.

“I promise, Miss Bella. One day I will tell you the rest of the story.” Jasper concluded. I assumed he could feel my confused emotions about his denial to help his brother in arms.

Nodding my head, I turned my head looking for a clock. Edward told me it was getting close to two thirty and I was anxious. Charlie would be here soon. I wasn’t sure if he would go home first and change or if he would come charging in as the Chief of Police. I hoped not. Once he realized what was going on, I felt like he would end up being just as relaxed as I was. Esme offered me a drink of water and I happily sipped that as we all sat around the living room getting to know each other.


	6. Peter's Here Paul's There

Charlie’s cruiser pulled up the long driveway to the Cullen’s house around three p.m. I had been unaware until Edward suddenly stood and held his hand out for me to join him and when we clasped our hands together, he pulled me into the foyer and opened the front door. My dad parked and got out of the car with a hesitant smile on his face.

“You okay, sweetheart?” He asked loud enough for me to hear him. I smiled widely and watched as his eyes dropped from my face to where I was still holding Edward’s hand. His face grimaced and eyebrows drooped down before Edward giggled and stepped closer to my side. I looked at him curiously.

“He muttered under his breath that he knew this would happen. He doesn’t seem too upset about it though.” He tapped the side of his head with a grin and I smiled even wider, feeling like my face would split in two.

I let go of Edward’s hand and darted down the front steps of the porch, jogging lightly to my father who was heading my way. He held his arms out for me and I let myself fall into him, breathing him in and squeezing him tightly.

When I pulled back, I talked to him with my hands excitedly while we walked back toward Edward and the rest of his family. They had all gathered in the foyer and were watching me with fond smiles and chuckles.

“Dad! Peter is coming, can you believe it? I can’t wait for him to get here. Edward and I are dating now, I hope that doesn’t upset you too much but I figured you should know. Rosalie and Alice want to take me shopping Sunday and you’ll never guess what I found out!” The speed at which I was signing was proof enough for my giddiness and my father chuckled as he hugged me into his side and kissed my forehead.

“Woah, kiddo. Let’s get settled in and you can start from the beginning. Hello, Carlisle.” Charlie said as we were led deeper into the house and he nodded to the patriarch. Esme went into the kitchen for a moment and returned with a couple glasses of iced tea with lemon wedges. Charlie settled into a seat on the sofa as Carlisle directed with a thank you to Esme and pulled me down with him, giving Edward a mock stern look when he tried to sit close to me. “Don’t think you’ll be taking her time away from me, boy.”

We could all hear the joke in his voice but the look on Edward’s face led me to believe that maybe his mind hinted at something more serious. I wouldn’t blame Charlie. He had only just gotten me back into his life and after everything we’d been through, he wasn’t about to let me go too soon.

We both knew we didn’t have a lot of time…

I cut that train of thought down quickly, remembering there was a mind reader in the midst. Unfortunately, I didn’t get away with it as both Jasper and Edward’s heads whipped around to look at me worriedly. I ducked my head and stared at my lap. That would be a conversation for a much later time. Charlie’s arm pressed down on my shoulders and he looked at Carlisle.

“Well does anyone want to tell me what happened today?” He asked. His demeanor told us all that this was the Chief talking now, not my loving, caring father - though he never stopped being that.

Rosalie stood from her place beside Emmett and spoke softly. Emmett reached up and grasped her hand in silent support. “Chief Swan, I was with Bella at lunch and when I made a certain comment, she started hyperventilating and she passed out. I brought her home immediately so that my father could check her out.” The perfect beauty shifted on her feet uncomfortably under my father’s inscrutable stare.

Raising his eyebrow, Charlie took his arm from around my shoulder and leaned forward to put his elbows on his knees as he looked up at the blonde. “And what comment was it that made my daughter hyperventilate...hmm?” He asked her.

I tapped my dad on the arm to gain his attention. “It was harmless really. I asked her if she was hungry and she said no she was thirsty and Edward made a noise and it had me remembering my time from before.” My signing became slower and slower as I told my dad as if even my hands didn’t want to admit my weakness.

Edward leaned closer to me and whispered in my ear. “It’s not a weakness.”

The move nor the words were missed by my overly perceptive father who harrumphed and pulled me back into his side. I knew that the situation seemed to be getting under his skin and I didn’t want him stressing over something that ended up being okay so I quickly told him everything that happened from the moment I’d awoken on the sofa to our time chatting before he arrived.

By the end of my signing, which took forever because he would interrupt or jump up and pace, he was sitting with his head in his hands, muttering under his breath. I sat diligently beside him with my hand on his back, rubbing soothing circles.

I looked at Edward in question and he looked over to Jasper who nodded. Edward signed so that he wouldn’t disturb Charlie’s contemplation.

“He knows what we are. Billy had been warning him to stay away from us but since your story, he knows it’s true. He knows that Peter is one of us as well and is trying to come to terms with that. His emotions are fairly stable.”

I leaned my head against Charlie and he looked over at me. “This is a lot to take in, Bells. You sure about all this?” I knew that he was not only talking about what the Cullens were but also of me and Edward. Though, I still seemed to be in the dark about what they were.

I nodded against his shoulder and then looked up at him without lifting my head. “Yeah Dad, I am.”

“Well, isn’t this a purdy picture.” The deep southern bass sounded loudly from the front door and my head whipped around just as Charlie stood up, taking me with him. I looked around at the others and noticed they had all stood as well.

“Peter!” He exclaimed as the tall drink of water that had become one of my best friends sauntered into the living room and spread his flannel covered arms wide.

My grin was a mile wide and I ignored Edward’s low growl as I ran straight into the newcomer. Peter wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly and I pressed my cheek to his neck as I sobbed happy tears.

“I know, sweet pea. I missed you too.” He murmured as he rubbed his splayed wide palms across my back.

Stepping back from the embrace, I saw Edward standing next to me and smiled at him before looking at Peter again. I signed my words to him.

“I'm so glad you're here!” I stopped when Peter held up a hand.

“None of that, Bells and you know it. I want your words.” At my horrified look he softened his stern features and smiled. “You can do it. We've worked on it together and you know I've got faith in you.”

I shook my head and glanced pointedly around the room at everyone gathered. They were watching my interaction with Peter like it was fascinating. It made me nervous.

“A little help, Major?” Peter asked and I shook my head again. I didn't want the patho’s help. I didn't want to talk in front of everyone. Hell, even when I spoke to Peter it was in whispers.

Thankfully, Edward cut in. As much as I liked Peter, I wouldn’t have him pushing me past my limits. “I think we should let her take this at her own pace.” He spoke smoothly as he placed his arm around my shoulders.

“What do we have here, sweet pea? You find yourself a vamp to attach yourself to? I thought I was your favorite man?” I saw the taunt in his eyes and the smirk that tugged at his lips. I also heard the rumble coming from Edward but I couldn’t respond. I could only stand there gaping at him as the images that had spun through my mind for years and then the things that had happened since I met Edward and Rosalie and Alice started to make sense.

Each scene fit together like a puzzle and I stood there, gaping like a loon while Peter’s smile widened impossibly. Edward’s hand gripped my shoulder as he waited for me to reach the inevitable and very obvious conclusion.

Peter is a vampire. Edward, Rosalie and the rest of the Cullens were vampires.

Maria was a vampire.

As memories of the cold and sickening touches of Dominic flooded my mind, I felt the bile burn my chest and throat as it threatened to explode.

I’d been raped by a vampire.

A bucket appeared in front of me just in time as I retched loudly. The acidic bile stung my nose and throat as it expelled from my body and I was barely aware of Edward’s hands on my waist holding me up and Peter’s hands holding my hair back. The two men murmured soothingly to me as my eyes teared up and spilled over. My stomach tightened and twisted in pain as the nightmare played over and over in my mind. I heard Charlie shouting in the background but it sounded as if he were in a deep tunnel. The sound of my vomiting overrode everything else around me.

I could hardly feel embarrassed.

Alice and Rosalie came to my aid once I was finished and finally in control of my thoughts and carried me gently upstairs to a large pink and white tiled bathroom. Alice started a shower for me as Rosalie left for a moment only to return carrying a bundle of clothing. After laying out a new toothbrush and bottle of Listerine, Alice turned to me with a soft look on her tiny face.

“Clean yourself up, Bella and we will be here to help you when you’re done. You’re safe here, I promise.”

Rosalie patted my shoulder and I jerked unintentionally before giving her an apologetic look, already taking the elastic band from my hair. She smiled in understanding before she and Alice left. As soon as the door was shut to the frilly bathroom, I stripped my clothes. Pulling a large sip of Listerine in my mouth, I stepped into the steamy shower stall and started scrubbing my body. When my eye caught the bottle of rubbing alcohol on the side, I sent a silent thank you to Alice. I needed to scrub myself clean again. Spitting the mouthwash out while I scrubbed my body raw, ignoring the divots and lumpy scars on my abdomen, I tried to keep my thoughts in a good place.

Drying off with an oversized fluffy towel, I dressed in the clothes Rosalie brought me. A light blue long sleeved thermal shirt, not unlike the one Edward was wearing and a surprisingly soft pair of blue denim jeggings. A navy cardigan was the finishing touch and I felt a bit more normal after I brushed my teeth and then my hair out and left it to hang loose, pulling the elastic band over my wrist to use later. When I emerged from the bathroom, instead of Alice and Rosalie, I was met with the concerned gaze of Peter. I looked around for Edward but he wasn’t there.

I stifled the feeling of disappointment I felt. Hopefully my display downstairs didn’t turn him off from me.

“Hey now. I’m sorry I pushed you. And I’m sorry I let the cat out of the bag. I figured you’d know by now.” He looked genuinely worried that I would be upset with him.

“I’m not mad, Peter. Just don’t push me, please. I just met these people. I’m not even talking to Charlie yet. Please don’t make me talk to you in front of everyone. Not yet.” I pleaded with my eyes as I spoke with my hands.

“Of course, Bells. I’m sorry. Come on, let’s go back down to the others.” As we slowly walked out of an equally frilly pink bedroom, Peter kept up a stream of conversation. “I heard about everything that’s happened, including you being afraid of Jasper. I know you've been through literal hell but you've got to start trusting someone sometime.”

I kept walking as I signed to him. “I do trust some people. I trust you and Jake, Charlie…” I paused and took a deep breath. “I'm starting to trust Rosalie and Edward.”

At the mention of Edward, Peter stopped his feet and turned to me. I stopped as well, looking at him quizzically. “He's found a mate in you, you know.” At my nod, he sighed and tugged on the ends of his shoulder length dirty blonde hair. “You know this means you're gonna have to…”

I wasn't sure what he was about to say because suddenly the hall was filled with an angry Rosalie and Edward. A warning hiss left Rosalie's mouth as her lips curled away from her teeth and I shrunk back to the wall.

She was glorious in her anger but I was a smidge frightened of the blonde goddess.

“Don't! Do not presume to tell her what she's ‘gonna have’ to do!” She growled at my friend.

Peter's stance remained passive as he regarded first one then the other Cullen. He nodded once before turning to me with a blinding smile. “My work here is done.” He laughed as he headed down the staircase to the main floor.

After about a week of weird things happening around Peter when he saved me, he admitted that he had a sixth sense for what was to come. A spidey sense, he called it - referencing one of my favorite superheroes, Spiderman. I’d learned quickly to simply go with the flow. Tid bits would be passed along to me and I would connect the dots on my own, apparently flowing straight in the exact direction Peter knew I would.

That’s what happened now, as I followed a subdued Edward and still vibrating Rosalie down the stairs. I was going to have to do something in order to be Edward’s mate. A shiver swept down my spine as Maria’s menacing words echoed in my head.

“ _I’ll turn you into a monster. You will be my monster! My Goddess of Destruction!_ ” She’d cackled like a lunatic before slamming the door to my bathroom prison.

I ignored Edward’s concerned looks and thought through what that meant. How does one turn into a vampire? What does the process entail and was it inevitable, as I assumed since Peter used his apparent ‘spidey senses’ to hint at me? I let the conversations flow around me as I thought on this, sitting beside Charlie who was hovering and making sure I was alright. I knew my time was getting shorter and shorter as the weeks and months went on. Would this be a salvation or a damnation?

I nodded and signed when I needed to but I felt more robotic than normal. As if I was just going through the motions to be polite...not really engaging anyone. After a bit, Charlie bid everyone a goodnight and I dutifully received hugs from Alice and Esme and a kiss on the back of my hand from Edward. It was getting late and Charlie had an early shift in the morning while I had school.

Carlisle handed me a small piece of paper as I was getting into the cruiser. “This is an official doctor’s excuse. Just hand it to the secretary and you won’t be labeled as absent for today.” He said kindly. I smiled at him and signed my thanks as he shut my door and Charlie turned the car around. Edward watched with sad eyes as we drove down the driveway, further from him.

Once we were home, Charlie kissed my cheek and ruffled my hair before saying goodnight and trudging tiredly up the stairs. Today had been a lot for him to take in but he seemed to be doing well. In my room, I checked my phone, hoping to see a text from Jake but then I couldn’t remember if he even had a cell phone. I got ready for bed and drifted off fairly quickly, completely exhausted myself.

Today was the last day of school until Tuesday. I knew Charlie had plans tonight and I was excited to go with him. I got ready for school in the same clothes Rosalie had let me borrow, looking longingly at my vintage Midi dress that I would be wearing tonight. I’d have to wear thick leggings under it because of the weather but I was excited to show it off. It had been a gift to me from my father for my arrival. It’s vibrant red and onyx black with white polka dots looked both retro and elegant. Large shiny black buttons adorned each side of my waist. It fell to my knees in a flare and made me feel beautiful. I couldn’t wait to get home to do my hair.

School went by fairly quickly as Edward kept me entertained between each class. I ignored the growing whispers about Ugly Duckling Bella being near the perfection that was Edward Cullen. Petty, jealous girls in high school made me sick and I was glad that I was a senior. No need to suffer through this ever again after June. Rosalie and Edward both sat outside with me for lunch as I munched on a Lunchable and sipped from my juice pouch. I didn’t even bother getting my book out. I was having too much fun watching them bicker like children. I was thankful that Edward never commented on my thoughts from last night.

Edward staked his claim in the school’s parking lot while I waited for Charlie to pick me up. He held my hand when he met up with me outside the Main Office and looked around as if to check that people were watching before he looked into my eyes intensely. The burning gold was back as he stared at me, his grip on my hand tightening as he ducked his head. His free hand wound around my waist and he pulled me against him. All I could do was stare into his mesmerizing eyes as if I was hypnotized.

My chest was pressed to his and I could feel the hard definition of his chest against my breasts. I wanted to hum in appreciation. Slowly, so slowly that I could see from my peripherals that students were gathering around, Edward brought his lips down to mine. The rest disappeared as my eyes fluttered closed. The cool plump lips shaped to mine and I wrapped my arms around his neck, plunging my fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck. A rumbling vibrated in his chest and I just knew it was the same noise from when I’d been passed out. It felt wonderful against my skin.

I heard the gasps and murmurs all around us but didn’t lift my lips from Edward’s nor did he separate from mine. Our lips danced together and he slanted his head to deepen the kiss. We kept it rated PG and I was glad because I didn’t want my first french kiss to be in the school’s parking lot surrounded by Nosy Nancys.

Edward pulled away and touched his forehead to mine as I gained control of my breathing, my chest pressing tighter to his with each inhale. We stared into each other’s eyes, ignoring the hoots and vulgar shouts, just breathing each other’s air. He stepped back just as I heard the crunch of tires against asphalt and we both turned to see Charlie pulling into the lot. Only a few students stayed to watch the show but unfortunately for them, there wouldn’t be one. I pecked Edward on the lips one more time before walking away, my arm outstretched like a cheesy rom-com chick, unwilling to let go of his fingers. He chuckled at my inner monologue and I grinned at him as I got into the cruiser and buckled myself in.

Charlie was laughing under his breath as we pulled away and I held my finger to my lips to shush him. That only made him giggle which made me smile goofily. We headed toward home happily, with Charlie keeping up a steady stream of chatter.

“You ready for tonight, Bells? No wait, don’t answer that. I already know you’re not. Knowing you, you’ll want to get all dolled up and then make something to take with us. I’m right aren’t I? Of course I’m right. It’s how it always goes. You’ll run upstairs, stay hidden for _two hours_ , come down looking like you just stepped out of a magazine, then insist on making something to take. You’ll get something on your dress and insist that I wait some more for you to get a different dress on. By the time you’re ready, I’ll be sitting on the couch watching television and you’ll roll your eyes and wave your hands to get my attention and act like it’s _my_ fault that we’re late. I’m right, aren’t I, Bells?” He was laughing so hard at himself that by the time we got home and he finally took a breath, I’d forgotten what I was annoyed with.

Okay, so he was partially right. I didn’t take two hours to get ready though. That was just overkill.

We left for La Push at four thirty with me grinning and sticking my tongue out at Charlie. He had been the one to fall asleep on the sofa while I made a double batch of cookies and two shepherd's pies. I cooked before I got my Midi dress on and then I did my mascara and eyeliner with an over exaggerated cat wing. My hair was in large victory rolls on the top of my head with a large bright red flower pinned above my left ear and the rest of my hair was in large curls that cascaded down my back. Slipping on some bright red shiny flats, I got downstairs to find Charlie still passed out in his uniform and I tapped my foot incessantly until he woke up.

He jerked awake as if someone had hit him and I grinned. “Aha!” He exclaimed. I rolled my eyes and pointed to the clock. He grumbled as he stomped upstairs to get changed and I stood in the entry by the front door holding the two pies and a big ziplock bag full of cookies. When Charlie came downstairs he grinned good naturedly and grabbed the load from my arms, leaving me empty handed so I took the keys from the bowl on the end table by the door and locked up behind us. I opened the back door for my dad behind his seat and he set the food down before taking the keys.

Pulling up to Billy’s house, I was hit with a wave of deja vu as Jake came running from the house and scooped me out of the car in a big bear hug, spinning me around. I grinned, so glad that he wasn’t angry at me for whatever reason anymore. I wanted to bring it up as we walked inside but decided that now wasn’t the time. Maybe later when we took our traditional walk out along the breakwater after the bonfire.

Crap. I had to tell him I had a boyfriend.

Jake and I walked side by side down to the bonfire on First Beach as he chatted animatedly about my outfit and the car he was working on in the Taj. He never mentioned his strange behavior and neither did I. Billy and my dad were going to come down in a little while. My phone buzzed and I took it out of my Marvel purse, seeing that I had a text from Peter. He let me know he would see me later tonight and I wondered why. I usually didn't get back from La Push until late in the night, driving a drunk Charlie home. I didn't like driving the cruiser at all with those gadgets and the horsepower under the hood, but I didn't have much choice. He wouldn't be driving us.

“Who's that, Bells? Your boyfriend?” Jake asked tauntingly, a smile on his face, giving me the perfect opening.

I sighed. Here goes nothing.

Signing to him, I sat down on a hollowed out, old piece of driftwood by the breakwater. “That was Peter.” At Jake's widening eyes, I nodded and signed his whole name. “Yes, Peter Whitlock.” I explained the incidence from yesterday, leaving out the strange and _other_. I wasn't about to get accused of being insane by my best friend.

“So, he's your boyfriend now.” Jake said, talking about Edward after I finished telling my story.

“Yeah, he is. He's so sweet and such a gentleman. I've never had a boyfriend before as you know. And guess what.” I demanded.

Moving his hands and twisting his face dramatically for the sign, he asked, “What!?”

“I got my first kiss. My first _real_ kiss, Jake!” I was so giddy, I felt almost ridiculous but not having any good experiences in that aspect ever before, I felt that I was entitled to be a little silly about it.

Jake's eyes widened and he pressed a gripping hand over his heart. “Oh God!” He cried. “Say it ain't so!”

I rolled my head back, shoulders shaking as I smiled widely at him. Nodding my head, I leaned close like I was telling a secret, even signing low in my lap. “He staked his claim at school for our second kiss. In front. Of. Everyone.” I paused between each word so he could feel the heaviness of that sentence.

Staring at my hands a moment, Jake lifted his arm and I thought for sure he would pull me in for a hug. Instead, he used a big tanned hand to push my shoulder and I landed on my ass in the sand with my legs draped over the tree log. I glared at Jake who was laughing up a storm. I just sat there, wriggling my ankles waiting for the buffoon to pick me up. If I tried to get up on my own, I knew I would end up flashing the few people who were wandering around, getting ready for the bonfire.

Still laughing, Jake grabbed my hand and tugged me upright easily and I slapped his arm as I brushed the sand off my dress and fluffed it a bit. “Bellsey got herself a couple kisses. How sweet.” He said as he ruffled the curls against my back. I stuck my tongue out at him then tugged him back toward the middle of the beach. “He better not hurt you. I'll have to kill him. Charlie knows where we can bury his body. You know he'll help me.”

Oh God. “What is it with you and him making all the threats, hmm? Even if he does hurt me, that's apart of life. You should know that by now.” I signed. Jake's eyes got serious and he tugged me to a stop.

“Normal hurt is apart of life, Bells. Heartbreak, a skinned knee when you fall off a bike, stubbing your toe…” His eyes hardened. “What you went through is not normal hurt. What you will go through is not normal hurt. You got handed a shit deal, Bells and me and your dad are here to make sure you get the most out of this life. You hear me?”

I gulped and nodded, feeling the large lump in my throat as it grew with my emotions. Jake pulled me in for a hug and I squeezed him back. When he pulled away, he leaned down to peck my lips but I turned my face so he kissed my cheek. Side eyeing me, he sighed.

“It's ‘cause of the boyfriend, right?”

I nodded with a goofy smile. Pursing my lips, I signed, “These lips are all his now, bucko!”

Jake giggled and threw his arm around my shoulder as we started walking again. “So long as he knows I'm never going anywhere, he can have your lips. I get bestfriend rights.”

I signed ‘yes’ enthusiastically with a big smile.

As we got closer and closer, Jake's mood turned sour and I looked ahead to see that the burly man, Sam, from Billy's was here. He was surrounded by three other large natives and Leah Clearwater. The only man I recognized was Embry Call and I nearly swallowed my tongue.

What happened to the skinny boy with long greasy hair and wide smile? This man was angry, his dark brows pulled low between his eyes as he stared stoically into the trees, his hair shorn down almost to his scalp. Leah looked my way and grimaced as Jake and I gave them a wide berth before she sat near her father, Harry and Old Quil. Sam watched her every move, as if she would disappear should he look away. The intense way he looked at her reminded me of how Edward looked at me.

I noticed Jake shivering as we plopped down on a thick striped blanket in the sand near Billy and Charlie, waving at them.

“Are you okay, Jake?” I signed to him, using my signature move for his name without the tongue lolling. He nodded soundlessly, keeping his eyes on the group of large men. I rubbed my open palm over his shoulders but he didn't feel cold to me so I wasn’t sure why he was trembling. His black tee was stretched wide over his growing muscles and he wasn't wearing a sweatshirt so I thought he would be cold. Instead, my hand was met with an intense heat, almost as if he had a fever but his skin didn't feel clammy. “Are you sure? You're feeling kind of warm.” I removed my hand from him so I could speak.

“I'm fine, Bella. Leave it alone.” He snapped and I scooted away from him a bit, looking at him with raised eyebrows. His mood swings were giving me whiplash. I decided that I would leave him to his thoughts. When I turned to look at the fire again, I noticed that Sam and one of the others had their eyes on Jake.

As Billy started speaking, he gained the attention of the small group gathered and I listened with rapt attention as he told the stories of the Quileute Legends. I'd heard them before but I had never really put much stock into them. After what Charlie said at the Cullens about Billy's warnings, I found myself fascinated as I connected all the dots.

I already knew the Cullens were vampires or as the Quileutes called them: Cold ones. But as the story went on, I found my eyes drifting of their own accord to the overly large native men. Could it be possible that since the cold ones existed that shape shifters would as well? Could these strangely muscular men with their angry features be what Billy called Spirit Protectors?

I shook my head at myself as I listened to Billy tell the story of the third wife and the fight with the female cold one. Why would she kill herself? If these monsters were as crazed for blood as the natives said, why not just slice some skin? Why plunge a dagger into your heart? Yes, I admit she was probably scared out of her mind but still. Who knows. Maybe I would be just as frantic in a life or death moment as well.

Jake stood after the stories and started walking down to the waves without me. I scrambled up and caught my foot on the edge of the blanket. I was going down hard until a large warm hand caught my upper arm in a painful grip. The hand belonged to a very handsome man with a scowl.

“Careful.” He snapped lowly before steadying me and turning away.

I signed ‘thank you’ to his back with wide eyes before shaking myself out of my stupor and running off to find Jacob. The moody boy was pulling his long hair into a low ponytail as he stared out at whitecaps. I walked up beside him and left a decent gap, not wishing to anger him further. Maybe he was going through a late puberty. I internally snickered at the thought. My face must have shown my amusement.

“What's so funny and why the hell do you smell like Paul?” He grouched.

I looked at him in surprise, turning to face him so I could sign. “Smell like Paul? What does that mean?”

Jake rolled his eyes. “I can smell that asshole on you.” His eyes were spitting fire as he glared at me as if it was my fault he was angry. I smelled like lavender and vanilla, not like some big sweaty man, I thought indignantly.

It was then I realized the man who stopped me from falling on my face must have been Paul but how could Jake smell him on me when all he did was grip my arm for a moment?

I huffed. “You're crazy, Jake. You can't smell anyone on me.” I turned to walk away, but Jake gripped my arm.

“I'm sorry, Bells. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just get so angry sometimes.” He said with a sigh.

“That doesn't explain your weird sense of smell, dude.” I pointed out.

He shook his head as he looked confused. “Yeah, I don't get that either.”

The conversation turned to easier topics as we walked along the beach until it was nearing midnight and we headed back to the bonfire that was dwindling down.

Jake pushed Billy's wheelchair to the house while I walked behind them beside Charlie. He hadn't had much to drink tonight, surprisingly. Maybe he was afraid he would say something about the Cullens if he did drink too much. Either way, after hugging both of the Blacks, we got in the cruiser and I drove us home. As we entered the town limit for Forks, I saw a large animal on the side of the road, partially hidden in the underbrush. I would've thought it was a bear if it weren't for the strange yellow eyes that glowed from it’s face. As I caught it's stare, the lips of the large mammal pulled back to reveal large canines and I gasped, the wheel of the cruiser jerking, sending the car weaving a moment before I got it back under control.

Charlie's hand hovered over the wheel. “Woah Bells! Are you okay?”

I nodded but kept my hands on the steering wheel and my eyes on the road. I kept darting quick glances in the rearview mirror but there was no sign of the creature.

Shit. I guess that answered my questions about shape shifters. There was no way that was a normal animal. It was amazing to me how easily I could accept shape shifters from legends but it had taken me years to realize that the odd people that surrounded my life were actually vampires.

I blame the trauma.

Once Charlie was settled into his bed, a glance at the clock told me it was nearing twelve thirty. I texted Peter that I was home and then sent a text off to Edward to tell him the same. Edward texted back that he missed me and I blushed. I loved the feelings that he created in me. Even from afar.

Peter knocked on my bedroom window softly and I jumped up to open it, wondering if this was how they would come to see me now that I knew their secret. Edward was with him. Peter scowled as he climbed through my open window with a grinning Edward coming in behind him.

Peter barely glanced at my outfit, used to my Rockabilly ways but Edward stopped and stared with his mouth open. His ocher eyes swirled with black as his gaze burned my skin from toes to face. I stood there, flattered with a bright blush. He came to me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

“You look beautiful.” He whispered. I signed my thanks before Peter interrupted.

“The fucker wouldn't stay away.” Peter grumbled as he settled on my bed. Edward's grin never wavered as he lifted Peter up and set him in the rocking chair before making himself at home on my bed against my pillows.

I just stood by my desk watching them. I was glad they seemed to get along, though Peter never stopped grumbling. I knew he let Edward move him. Peter had told me all about how he was the God of War’s second, the Captain.

“How was your night, Bells?” Peter asked after he stopped whining. His eyes were shining with mischievousness and I glanced at Edward, wondering what Peter was thinking.

Shrugging, Edward answered my thoughts. “Don't ask me, he's blocking me.” His crooked smile graced his face and my feet finally moved forward. I climbed onto the bed and sat cross legged, with my hands pushing down the dress between my legs, beside a lounging Edward.

“It went fine. I had a good time.” I signed much to Peter's disappointment. I rolled my eyes before lowering them and opening my mouth. Whispering quietly, I repeated what I had signed.

Edward grasped my hands, sitting up and twisting around so he was mimicking me. I looked at him and his eyes were filled with awe. It gave me courage to continue.

Still whispering, I told them about my night. “Jake has been having mood swings lately. I'm trying to brush them off. Oh.” I paused and took a deep breath. “Jake wants me to tell you not to hurt me.” I whispered shyly. I let him see in my mind how the conversation played out.

Cupping my face, Edward kissed my lips once. “I swear to you, on my existence...I will never hurt you.”

Peter cleared his throat and Edward cringed at something. “Okay.” He amended. “I may have to hurt you once...but I promise you will never hurt again.”

I was worried and looked at Peter who looked smug. “This has something to do with turning into a vampire, doesn't it?” I whispered.

Both men nodded and I expelled a large breath.

“I have some questions about that.” My voice never rose from a whisper.

Peter spoke as Edward nodded. “That's only fair, sweet pea. I'd be concerned if you didn't.”

Nodding, I looked around my sparse room, avoiding eye contact. “What does that entail? Becoming a vampire?” I figured that was the biggest question.

Tightening his hold on my hands, Edward’s soft, remorseful voice answered me. “It's painful. For three days you'll burn while my venom works it's way though your body. It will harden your skin, like mine. All of your scars will heal but it will feel like hell while it does so. You will awaken with red eyes while your human blood stays in your body for a few months.”

I stopped him, feeling horrified. Not at the thought of burning in hell. I'd been through hell already, but at the thought of something else. Memories of Maria killing my mother rose unbidden in my mind. “Will I kill people? Will I be a monster?” My whisper sounded hysterical to me while I looked from Peter to Edward with terrified eyes.

Peter stood from the rocking chair and came to me, rubbing my shoulders from behind, relaxing my tense muscles. Edward answered.

“You will want to.” At my look he rushed on. “We won't let you, love. We will teach you to hunt like us...on animals. Your inner vampire will want to hunt humans but we will teach you and keep you safe. You won't be able to be around humans for a while but we would never take you away from Charlie. You will keep your distance, with our help, but you can talk to him on the phone whenever you want. Once you've gained control you'll be able to see him and be around him again.”

My fast breathing and pounding heart evened out as Edward's words placated me. I didn't want to lose Charlie forever. Becoming a vampire would be better than the death that hung over my head, be it from old age or from the guillotine that hung ominously over my head. I decided that this could be a salvation, confirming my initial thoughts and feelings about Edward and Rosalie. “And any lingering diseases?” I asked.

“Completely wiped out, sugar. Vampirism means living forever. Unless of course, you piss off the wrong vamp or wolfy.” Peter winked. I wouldn’t have to die? I mean, I would die technically, I suppose, but I wouldn’t have to leave Charlie alone forever!

Another thought entered my mind and Edward's features darkened before I spoke. I voiced them anyway. “What about Jake and Billy?” I asked.

Peter laughed quietly as Edward growled. “That is where it gets complicated...See, the Quileutes have their legends and we have a treaty with them.” I perked up at that. I knew the legends but nothing about a treaty. “You know the legends?” He asked surprised.

“Yeah, I've heard them all my life but tonight I really paid attention.” I ran through thoughts of Sam and his group and startled when Edward growled.

“There’s more of them than I thought.” He muttered angrily. My thoughts now confirmed, I remembered Sam's words the first night I'd seen him.

“What did he mean by ‘They're back’?” I asked as I explained why I asked that. “Did he mean you guys?”

“Sam had been missing two of his pack. They returned that night. I had been with Jasper hunting that night when two of the wolves ran through our territory and Sam stopped us from attacking. The pack is not allowed on our land but they were new shifts and were confused about everything going on. We let them all pass with a warning to the new pups to stay off our land.” He seemed to be struggling to hold his temper in check and I traced his knuckles with my fingertips.

They shifted into wolves. How fascinating.

I supposed it made sense that Sam was so angry then, gaining two new pack members and having them run amok. It made me wonder though, why it was of concern to Billy.

Edward, once again, answered my inner thoughts. “Billy's the Chief. He gets informed of everything pack related.” I nodded my understanding.

“So is this why you wanted to come over? You knew I'd have questions?” I asked Peter, who nodded and shrugged.

“It's getting close to time, Bells. You should know what you're in for.” He said compassionately as he sat back down in the chair. It was getting close...every day got closer to my fate. His eyes were sad but they didn’t have to be if I was going to become like them. It didn’t scare me. Maria and Dominic are dead and I’ve been under Peter’s protection for months. I honestly had no doubt that Peter would come to me in a moment’s notice if I needed him and he had. The only thing standing in my way of getting a bit better was my nightmares.

Edward looked at me with sad eyes as well, though I knew his sadness was from the direction my thoughts had gone. I knew I would have to tell him more about what I’d been through but it was just so hard to think on. I wish I could just forget about it all. Life was too cruel for that though.

“Is Jake going to shift? Is that why it's complicated?” I asked, getting back to the initial question. I thought about his shivering, though he wasn't cold. I remembered his mood swings and warm temperature. He had told me that Sam, Paul, Jared, and Embry had all been angry right before they disappeared for a week or two. I wondered if that would happen to Jake as well.

Edward sighed heavily. “I'm afraid so, love. Once he's a wolf, he won't want you near him after you're turned. You won't smell good to him at all.”

“But I can still be his friend before I turn right? I don’t have to stop being his best friend just because he’s a shapeshifter.”

Edward was just about to nod, I could tell until Peter stepped close, laying a heavy hand on Edward’s shoulder. “You can still be the best of friends, Bells. Just don’t freak out if he goes missing for a couple of weeks, okay? It just means it’s his turn to gain control of his new fate.”

The thought of Jake not wanting to be near me someday made tears prick my eyes. I didn't want to lose my best friend.

This _did_ complicate things.


	7. Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Mentions of rape. Be advised.

Peter’s POV

Oh, my sweet pea. She was gonna be the death of me. Sitting in Jasper’s study alone while he and the rest of the family go off to hunt, I let myself sink into the memories of Bella Swan. I laid back on the maroon velvet chaise lounge in the corner of the room and put my arm over my eyes.

_The first time that I caught a glimpse of the little girl, she was curled in the fetal position on her bed. I had been tracking Maria and her cohort for months and for some reason, she’d been holed up in the small ranch style house in Phoenix. The child didn’t see me, of course as she was bawling her eyes out and mumbling for her mother, but the flood of information in my head told me she was important._

_I couldn’t stay and keep her safe, much as I wanted to, though because while Maria was playing house, she was also commanding an army to take down the Volturi. My lack of scent gave me leeway to spy on her from afar but when I got too close, she would get away and I had a chase on my hands. The bitch just wouldn’t stay still. For years I tried to track her down and every time I got close, she would slip through my fingers. I should’ve asked for help but as I’d found out later, it would’ve gotten me nowhere._

_Each time Maria would leave her army, leading me on a chase, she would disappear and I would go back to the compound to destroy her newborns. The only other vampire I hadn’t been able to get my hands on was her second in command, Dominic._

_I’d spend an eternity wishing I’d gotten to him first._

_By the time I got back to check on the little girl, so many years had passed that she was simply a broken shell of her former self and her former self had been pretty broken already. The fourteen year old girl was skin and bones, full of scars and burns, her hair dull and lifeless, breaking off in her palms when she would run her hands through it. Her clothes were stinking and filthy and I wondered how she was still alive. The squalor of the bathroom she was stashed away in was so terrible that I was gagging on it from a block away...It was the closest I’d dared to get without alerting Maria that I’d found her hideout._

I heard the telepath enter the house and stopped my thoughts there. The Cullens all wanted to know what had happened to Bella but unless she told them herself then they had no right to know.

“I’ve already heard quite a bit in Bella’s mind, you know.” He murmured sadly from his place in the study’s doorway.

I met his sad eyes with a remorse of my own as I sat upright on the lounge and patted the seat next to me. Once Edward was settled in beside me, I sighed heavily.

“She knows you can read her mind though, right?” I asked him while I looked at the floor.

“She knows. She will stifle some thoughts if she thinks it’s too much for her or she’s not ready for me to know. I understand that. I wish I had the ability to turn it all off. I’d rather she come to me in her own time than to pick it from her brain unwillingly.” He slouched into the chaise, defeated. I leaned back as well and crossed my legs, bouncing my booted foot nervously.

“I know why she can stop her thoughts but I won’t tell you. I’ve gotten good at not thinking certain things over the years to keep myself sane. She will be magnificent when she’s a vampire though, I can tell you that for sure. Absolutely magnificent. It’s why Maria wanted her so badly. She had her own seer before I killed him. He told her of the great power that Bella would someday have. She was so greedy to have the power back in her hands that she’d been missing since Jasper left her.” I shook my head. It was disgusting how much that woman destroyed Bella. You’d think she’d want to befriend the child, make her love her, manipulate her into helping her. The way she’d gone about it, Bella would’ve killed her rather than help her once she was turned.

“The family won’t be home for a long time, I’ll go back to Bella’s. I know you’d rather think about it than not. Get it ‘off your chest’ so to speak.” Edward said as he stood fluidly. He looked back at me as he was leaving the study, stopping with a hand on the door frame. “I’m glad you saved her, Peter. Thank you.”

I nodded my head once. “She deserved to be saved.”

Once Edward was gone again, I let myself sink into the plush upholstery and let my mind wander some more. It was cathartic, especially now after seeing how much progress she’s made.

_Every time I’d tried to get close to the girl’s house to save her, Maria would have someone there to chase me off. I couldn’t very well go in and ransack the place. The ranch home was located in a fuckin’ cul-du-sac. After I found out that she’d been being used by Dominic, I recruited the help of my friend Felix from the Volturi. He hated rapists. By then, I’d learned the girl’s name was Bella and she had turned fifteen years old. Dominic had fucked her up badly, mutilating her stomach and sides with his fingers. Maria didn’t want her to die and she was too young to control as a newborn so she sent her to the hospital. She told the authorities that Bella had wandered out and gotten herself attacked by a rabid coyote. She’d laughed as Bella had not only needed surgery but numerous rabies injections as well._

_She had been in the hospital, bandaged and drugged with a feeding tube and catheter for over a week before I found Dominic lurking outside the hospital, waiting for a chance to get inside and finish the job. He’d been tired of the little girl and wanted Maria to himself. He knew that Bella would end up Maria’s second in command once she was turned and trained._

_The ignorant asshole was in the alley between the hospital and the parking garage when I found him. Sneaking up on someone is easy with no scent and this fucker was so preoccupied with his plans for Bella that he didn’t even realize I was there until I snapped his neck. He fell limply, waiting for his neck to heal. I grabbed his nasty dick and twisted it off before literally shoving that thing down his throat._

_“You like to fuck little girls? Suck your own cock, you sick son of a bitch. It’s the last sexual encounter you’ll ever have.” I dragged him down the alley and over a large concrete wall that split the hospital grounds from the sparse of trees beyond it. That was when I took off running. Once we were far enough away, I started tearing him apart slowly. The asshole deserved more than this but I had to get back to Bella before Maria decided to check on her as she was wont to do._

_Slowly dismembering him, I lit each tiny piece on fire separately, relishing in his screams for mercy._

_“You didn’t give Bella mercy, did you!” I roared in his face, venom spittle splattering all over him, burning his exposed muscle and tendons. Our own venom didn’t bother us at all but when an open wound was introduced to alien venom, it burned like the change. Dominic’s features twisted in agony but I felt no pity. Only disgust._

_“You’re a filthy fuckin’ pig.” I spat in his eyes before I threw the rest of him in the pyre I built especially for him. “Adios, cabron.” Once he was cooled ash, I used my cowboy boots to push the dust away and scatter it before racing back toward the hospital._

_After speaking to the hospital staff and handing them fake paperwork that Felix helped me gather, I was able to sit with Bella constantly to keep a vigil over her. Felix was assured that Bella would be changed one day after her eighteenth birthday and went on his way home to Italy. Felix had known me for over a century so he and Aro were convinced that my ‘spidey senses’ worked just fine. They had no reason to doubt what I said._

When the house was infiltrated with it’s inhabitants, I stood from the lounge and greeted them. The recovery that Bella went through was something I was willing to let them in on. Maybe not all of it, I’d see where the day took us, but they deserved something. They were going to become her family after all. Rosalie already looks to her as a sister and she is Edward’s mate. I plopped my wrangler jean clad ass into the same overstuffed chair Bella had occupied before and waited patiently for the family to shower, fuck, and come back down. I didn’t mind listening to the sounds of a vampire coven do their thing. The way I’d been introduced to this world? This was nothing.

Edward arrived from Bella’s house and went upstairs to immediately shower and get dressed in different clothes. I smelled Bella’s arousal on him and wondered what all they got up to last night. It irked me. Though it’d been years since Bella had been hurt, the human mind was a fickle thing and they didn’t get over things so quickly. As a vampire, we could push our pains to a different part of our brain and it wouldn’t bother us for the rest of eternity if we so wished it.

“Is Bella coming over today?” Esme asked as she sat on the sofa next to her mate. Edward was sitting on the fireplace mantle on my right, hands on either side of his body to grip the mantel and swinging his legs like a kid.

“Not today. She has plans with her father, I’m afraid.” He said.

“Are you going to tail them, Edward? I told you, you need to keep to the shadows. You never know what could happen.” Alice warned him. She sat elegantly on the edge of the sofa next to Esme while Edward scowled at her.

“I wasn’t going to tail her but now I’m nervous. What have you seen?” He demanded, his legs now hanging limply.

“Easy now, nothing’s gonna happen. Jake’s phased last night and he’s gonna ignore her when they go to La Push later, is all.” I reassured them.

It was Alice’s turn to scowl at me. “I wish I could see past the wolves. I see nothing but blackness when I try to find Bella later. It scares me to death.”

“You’re already dead!” Edward and I said at the same time and then busted out laughing. Jasper tried to hide his grin behind his hand while Emmett boomed a laugh from upstairs. Alice pouted cutely before grinning. After all, it was her own words she just ate.

“Okay, we’re here! Let’s get this show on the road. I wanna know what happened to Bella!” Emmett said loudly as he sat roughly on the loveseat, dragging Rosalie into his lap and throwing an iron arm around her hips to hold her in place.

Rosalie rolled her eyes. “Yes, I want to know what happened too but shouldn’t Bella be the one to tell us this, herself?” She asked.

“You’re not wrong.” I started.

“Then let’s just wait then.” Carlisle interjected.

I shook my head. “I’m the one who helped her get to the point she was at when she moved here, you all are the ones…” I looked pointedly to Edward and Rosalie. “who helped her in the last few days. This progress is not because she’s suddenly getting better. It’s because she’s around people she’s learning to trust.”

Carlisle nodded, agreeing with what I was saying and Rosalie sat back onto Emmett. “Don’t tell us everything then, okay? I don’t want Bella to think we’re talking about her behind her back. It’s not like that.” Rosalie petitioned.

I nodded and Edward spoke. “Only Bella knows how she felt about everything she went through when she went through it. She will tell us in her own time, or she won’t. It’s not our concern. We can be nosy all we want but it’s literally not our business. As for her recuperation, that’s up to Peter to tell us what he wants and Bella to tell us the rest if she wants. I’m not pushing her. She wants to forget as it is.”

Esme looked thoughtful before she spoke, grasping onto her mate’s hand. “Maybe the change will make her forget. If we don’t tell her to remember everything, if we’re careful about telling her what to remember...Maybe the fire will wipe her memory of that time.”

I contemplated that for a minute and could see that everyone else was too. Jasper spoke up first.

“But she’s who she is because of what she’s been through.” He offered.

Edward scoffed. “She feels weak and disgusting. Once she’s changed she will be more perfect than she already is. If she has no recollection about her past trauma then she has no reason to feel weak and disgusting.” I could tell he was for this idea of Esme’s.

“She’s already who she is and the venom won’t alter _who_ she is, just what she remembers.” Alice countered her mate who touched her nose with his finger and kissed her cheek, acquiescing to her opinion.

“Alice is right and so is Esme, I believe. We told every one of you to remember. Remember everything. Remember your lives, your parents, your hobbies, etcetera. And you did. Esme, you struggled for years with what you remembered. Rosalie, you too. Edward, you remembered everything so vividly that you couldn’t stand to be around a mated couple. We were too much like your parents, you’d said. Emmett is a different story. He’d had a wonderful life and channeled his fear of bears into a game, knowing he would never have to be afraid of them again. If we tell Bella to remember Jake, Peter, Edward, Charlie, us…Just a few things, and we don’t tell her that the burn will wipe her memories, she won’t latch onto it and the venom will in fact wipe the torture away.” Carlisle said.

Esme beamed at her husband and he kissed her chastely on the lips. Emmett looked uncomfortable but shrugged. Rosalie seemed to think this was a good idea just as much as the rest of them.

‘Kay then. Time to burst their bubble.

I stood from my comfortable seat and cleared my throat unnecessarily. “My dear, delusional Cullens. If you aren't honest with Miss Bella from step one, she will find out about it. You think to hide something this big from her? When everyone else here knows about their human life - as much as the venom didn’t wipe away - and then she knows nothing except some people’s names, that she will just think nothing of it? That she won’t feel like you’re hiding something from her?” I stopped and stared at each of them for a long second. "You'd have her forget her mother?"

Emmett was the only one not looking ashamed.

“Bella needs to be informed of everything that we can think to tell her. If something slips our minds, she’s more apt to forgive and move on. If we deliberately hold something from her and she finds out? Boy, will she ever find out…” I shook my head. “We will have a hellcat on our hands that not even the wolves can help us stop. She’s learning to trust us all, me included. Let’s not fuck that up by lying to her.”

I sat back down and crossed my ankles, lacing my hands behind my head as I made myself comfortable.

Let them think on _that_ for a minute or two.

“You’re right. I wasn’t thinking about that. I just wanted make her eternity much easier than it will be if she remembers all that pain and suffering.” Esme said thickly. Carlisle embraced her.

“Jasper was right.” Rosalie said. “She is who she is because of what she’s been through. She deserves truth, choice, and love.”

“She will get it. I will give her anything she desires, anything she deserves. I’ll give her whatever she wants.” Edward vowed. I chuckled. He would come to know that Bella was a sucker for a good gift and surprise. Being deprived of an entire childhood, a party is just the thing to reel her in. “I knew it.” Edward whispered excitedly as he swung his legs again.

Alice shook herself from a vision with a wide smile on her tiny face. Her eyes were practically glowing. “Homecoming weekend! Oh yay! A birthday party for Bella!” She jumped up from the couch and hopped around excitedly, causing everyone but me to smile fondly.

I waited, tapping my foot impatiently, for her to calm the hell down. When she did, she turned to me with her hands on her hips. “And just what is your problem, sir?” She asked with attitude.

“No wrapping paper. No glassware. No plates, no four tier cake!” I listed off on my fingers as my voice grew more and more stern.

Alice’s eyes were the size of baseballs when I was done. “Why not!” She demanded. “That takes away most of the decorating!”

“Decide to wrap Bella’s presents in wrapping paper, right now, someone.” I told the room at large.

Each person started listing off what they were getting Bella for her birthday and what color paper they would wrap her gift in, including fluffy, curly bows.

Alice’s eyes zoned out for a moment and when she came out of it she collapsed on the floor in pain. Edward hissed and jumped off of the mantel, landing in a protective crouch out of instinct to protect his mate. Jasper spared me a glare before he darted to her aid and lifted her in his lap. She struggled for a moment before scooting off his lap once he sat down on the sofa again. He looked at her a moment before trying to grasp her hand but she gently pulled from him again.

“Jasper.” Alice whispered.

“Fuck!” Edward swore as he straightened and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Jasper…” She whispered again. “You need to start working on your hunger. We’re feeding you our bloodlust.” She swallowed thickly. “We all have to work on our hunger.” Collapsing in tearless sobs, she let Jasper embrace her finally.

Esme looked on in horror while Carlisle tried to ask me what was going on. “Well, Pappy, my spidey senses tingled and told me that if Bella has a party, she’ll be happy, over the moon. But Alice there would go nuts on decorations and Bella would slice her pretty little finger open on a gift. Jasper here, would absorb everyone’s bloodlust and attack. Bella would die. No one could save her.”

“It’s not his fault.” Edward defended calmly when Alice and Rosalie looked at each other sadly. “We all don’t feed enough. It’s obvious. It will end up putting Bella in grave danger, so we start to branch out more. It’s that simple. Also, no gift wrap.” He added quickly.

Jasper looked down, feeling sorry for himself and I plopped my behind next to him and wrapped my arm around his shoulder, pulling my brother into me. “It’s not your fault, Major. You know you’re trying to help and it’s all well and good when there’s no tastey little humans around but we can’t gamble with Bella’s life. She doesn’t deserve to die. You just start hunting more. Go to Canada. Stop taking family outings to hunt. Just change the routine until Bells’ is one of us, ‘kay?”

Jasper looked up at me and grimaced, looking to his wife who still looked upset with him. “She won’t get that image out of her head, ever. Neither will Edward. They’ll always see me attacking Bella.” He scowled at his lap.

“It won’t be so disturbing once Bella’s a vampire, Jasper. Don’t beat yourself up for something that’s not going to happen.” Edward told him.

“Good, that’s settled. Now. Let me tell you about her damn recovery already.”

As I told the Cullens about how I found Bella in the hospital and ended up taking her home with me for the next two years, I reminisced in my mind as well.

_Bella was unresponsive to me in the hospital, noting my red eyes and pale complexion, she knew I was the same as her tormentor. She kept her eyes down and refused to speak the entire trip to my house outside of Houston, Texas. I tried to engage her in small talk but the girl just wouldn’t even look at me. She didn’t nod, she didn’t shake her head...She just sat there, lifelessly._

_We had been in Texas for three days. Each day she would get a full meal three times a day but she would barely eat it. She stayed in her bedroom, which had a connected bathroom with fresh clothes and all the toiletries a girl could ever dream of having. She didn’t use any of it except for rubbing alcohol and baggy sweats. Each night she would scream bloody murder, screaming for the torture to stop but when she woke, she seemed to have no recollection of actually screaming._

_I started small, bringing her coffee and sitting with her while she sipped at it. After two weeks, she smiled. I had been telling her about my days in the barn, tending the horses, when I told her how Macy had kicked me in the gut and broke her hoof. Poor girl had been a hard mare to break and unfortunately was too lame to keep after that but I didn’t tell Bella that. She only smiled when I displayed mock pain from the kick from my favorite horse. Another week went by of the agonizing screams, me making small talk while she sipped coffee, when she finally mouthed to me that she wanted sugar._

_“You want some sugar for your coffee, sugar?” I’d asked her. She nodded. “Do you know how to sign to me?” She shook her head. “Would you like to learn?” She nodded._

_That was how I’d gotten her set up with all the videos and books that I could find. The excitement lit her eyes but she still refused to come near me. “Would it be better if I put in contacts, sweet pea?” I’d asked her once. She shook her head and mouthed to me that she would know anyway._

_One day, about a month and a half of her being in my house, she started bleeding profusely. Her eyes were wide as saucers and the poor girl had gone through three rolls of toilet paper. I didn’t know what to do but I tried like hell to help her. She shook her head over and over, silent tears streaming down her face, refusing to let me near her. Finally, at my wits end and completely out of my depth, I invited a doctor to the house who scolded me for not teaching my 'niece' how to use maxi pads and tampons. I felt like a real schmuck but hell, I was from the eighteen hundreds and men didn’t get into the private bathroom affairs of women._

_Time moved slowly and her sixteenth birthday came and went. The look on her face when I presented her a pendant on a long chain was the best thing I’d ever seen in my existence. Bella learned fluent American Sign Language and started opening up to me. I’d taken some psychology classes for fun when I had been bored before the whole Maria thing started so I began giving her therapy sessions once a week. Every Thursday, I would force her from her comfort zone, having her meet me in the living room. The television would be on a nature show but on mute, the coffee pot would be percolating and the refrigerator would run. Normal household things. Bella had to learn how to coincide with a normal home again._

_Each session she would sign to me, open up to me like she’d never had before. It’d taken a few sessions but she finally told me everything that fucker did to her. Everything the bitch did to her. By the end of the first year, she had lifted her shirt and showed me her abdomen._

I blocked the actual image from my mind, careful only to use my mental words while I spoke to the family. Esme was sobbing and the rest of them had tears in their eyes. Edward looked ready to rip apart the town.

“Edward, she’s getting better every day.” I said soothingly.

He paced while he clenched his fists, a constant growl in his chest. Jasper offered to calm him down but I shook my head. He needed to work through this himself. Better to get it out now than in front of Bella. Any little thing could set her back and that was what I was worried about.

“About a year ago, we were driving and she opened my glove box for me. I’d gotten pulled over…”

_When the glove box popped open in my brand new Dodge Ram, a photo of Jasper fluttered to the floor of the cab. She bent down and picked it up, examining the Major in his angry glory. The photo was a sketch I’d done from memory and kept with me to remind me of my brother. After the police officer left us, she started signing her questions. She knew she could sign while I drove because she’d witnessed me pay absolutely no attention to the road and get us anywhere safely. This day, we had been driving back from the grocery store._

_“Who’s this?” She asked. “It says Major. Was he really a Major or is that a nickname?”_

_I told her all about my brother, Jasper Whitlock, Major of the Confederate Army. Her eyes had widened considerably the longer I spoke. I’d been telling her about a particularly funny time hunting when I mentioned that he ‘was the God of War for a reason’ when she immediately vomited all over my seats and floor before passing out._

_Boy, I’d been spitting mad but I hadn’t known at the time what was wrong. I’d thought maybe she had a bad burger for lunch or something. I’d not seen her pass out yet so it was something disturbing. Her eyes rolled back so far only the whites showed before her jaw slackened and her head rolled as if it wasn’t connected to her neck anymore. Slumped over in her own bile, I drove home quickly with the windows down, brought her inside and placed her in the tub. I was careful not to strip her as I rinsed her hair and her skin off. She woke, scared out of her mind until I soothed her, telling her she passed out and puked and that I was only there to help her. She nodded and told me she could take it from there._

_I’d sold my truck the next day after I cleaned it out. I’d never get that smell out. I never did tell Bella that though ‘cause I bought the exact same truck._

_Each therapy session got better and better. She started to whisper words to me. Usually only one word or two at a time, signing the rest of her sentences, but she never spoke above a whisper. I worked with her on her trust of me and it seemed to be going well. By the time her seventeenth birthday came, she’d gained quite a bit of weight, going from a small ninety pounds to a healthy buck fifteen. Her hair filled out and shined and she wore the clothes I bought for her._

_Maria had been lurking around and I’d told Bella that, but she hadn’t made a move and I was alone. No one would help me get rid of her. I couldn’t leave Bella unprotected if Maria led me on a chase again._

_Finally, Bella told me she was ready to call Charlie. She had only spoken to him over the phone in whispers once a month. She’d had no choice but to speak to Charlie over the phone though she hated it and had a breakdown every time they ended the call. She felt vulnerable speaking aloud and reverted right back every time so I limited the calls for her health._

_She saw him for three weeks the previous summer. Maria had made her go every summer to keep with the custody agreements and not hint to Charlie that Renee was dead, even when she was filthy and sick so we stuck to that once. But after that, she’d expressed that she wanted to get better so instead of going for Christmases, she said she was ill and couldn’t make it. I knew we’d made progress when she asked to call. She had me make the call to tell him everything - unsure she could do so without reverting - he’d been on the next plane to Texas and he’d hugged his girl for a solid hour while he cried_ _. He left after a few days with promises that I would bring his baby girl home as soon as possible._

_Thankfully, there was no setback when Maria crashed into the house one night while Bella was sleeping. The bitch thought I was gone, as I’d been lying on the floor outside Bella’s bedroom door, still as the stone I was. Having no scent came in handy that night more than any other time I’d needed it. I was up faster than I’d ever been and snatched Maria’s head off her shoulders before she could step into Bella’s open bedroom door._

_Bella watched as I tore the bitch apart, seeming to enjoy her screams as I did so, then throw her in a pyre in the firepit out the back door._

_That was the first time Bella let me touch her. She hugged me, clung to me as she sobbed soundlessly, her little fists clenched in the rags that had become of my favorite flannel._


	8. Dropping the Bomb

Peter left shortly after he told me that Jake needed to learn control of turning into a wolf and that I shouldn’t worry.

I would worry though. He’s my best friend and hopefully he always would be.

Edward was leaned back against my pillows again and motioned for me to lay against his chest. Though this whole boyfriend thing was new to me, I found it extremely easy to trust him and feel comfortable around him. It was as if this was exactly where I was supposed to be.

“It is, love.” Edward murmured in response to my thoughts. “That comfort you feel with me is from the mate bond.” His long fingers drew silky patterns on my upper arm. I sighed happily as I laid my cheek on his chest.

“ _Can you tell me more about the mate bond, please?_ ” I thought to him.

Making a noise in the back of his throat, I lifted my head to look at him, seeing his furrowed brows and raised one of mine in question. “You’re not going to speak now that Peter’s gone?” He asked, sounding a little hurt and annoyed.

Sitting up and grasping his hand, I gathered my courage from deep down inside myself, I whispered. “Yes, I’ll speak. Edward, please don’t be jealous of Peter. He’s one of my best friends. He saved my life. I’ll never be able to repay him and I know he doesn’t want me to...but please don’t be angry that we are close. It’s completely platonic, I promise you.” I wasn’t sure how to go about placating a jealous man so I was hoping I did okay. Edward had nothing to worry about. Not only was I never once interested in Peter that way, he was a bit of a man-whore. He loved his women and women loved him.

Smiling in relief, Edward wrapped me up in his arms again and gently pressed my head into his chest, dragging his fingers through the curls that rested on my back. I knew he was crushing my victory rolls, but I didn’t care in the slightest. Honestly, I was getting a bit of a headache from them. Without another thought, Edward started meticulously and feather lightly undoing the bobby pins from my hair and combing it out with a gentleness I didn’t expect. I felt like purring like a cat, that’s how good it felt. With no trouble at all, this man made me feel like I was worthy of more than I’d been dealt.

Jake’s words from earlier this evening rang through my head. “ _What you went through is not normal hurt. What you will go through is not normal hurt. You got handed a shit deal, Bells…_ ”

He was right. I had. My life was nothing like the rom-coms I’d seen or the books I’d read. My life had been a veritable hell and I was ready to be past it.

“Could you tell me about your disease, Bella?” Edward’s voice was but a whisper, as if he was afraid I would deny him. I hadn’t told him yet, not only because we were still learning each other and it had only been two days but also because there had been so much going on. The force of nightmarish thoughts that had evaded my mind over and over, the toll it had taken on my body...I knew he deserved to know.

He was my mate, after all.

“I have Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease. It’s running slower than they’ve ever seen...but I got it when they did the surgeries on my stomach.”

“CJD usually kills within months, Bella.” Edward’s voice was choked up and he held me tighter to him. “This is why you’re so at ease with becoming like me?”

I nodded against him. “When it finally stops crawling through me and strikes, which the doctors have warned me could happen any time, I will only have maybe a month and most of that will be spent with my muscles jerking involuntarily and my eyes going blind. My brain will stop working and I just don’t want that to happen. I’d rather shoot myself than deal with that if there was no other alternative. Now that I have you, I can’t think of a better way to spend my life.”

“Lives.” Edward murmured lovingly. “We’ll have many lives together, love.” He continued stroking my hair and my arm with his hands as he held me to him. “I’m so sorry, Bella.”

“Don’t. Don’t pity me. I may have been dealt a shitty hand but I refuse to give up now that I’ve found you. You really are my salvation.” I whispered. A quiet rumbling rolled through his chest and I nuzzled my cheek into him. “Are you purring?” I asked with a smile.

“I can’t help it. You make me feel so good. Just being able to hold you like this is the best thing I’ve ever done in my existence.” He said without stopping the purring. I understood what he meant since I had thought the same thing only moments before, wishing I could purr as well.

His words had my soul soaring and my smile widening. I sat up, pushing against his chest and giving him a kiss. I loved the way our lips moved together. I sat back and crossed my legs before the kiss could get out of hand. I wanted it to get out of hand, but that was beside the point. I had to ask him about Jake.

At my thoughts, Edward groaned and ran a hand down his face.

“You were going to ask that I stay away from Jacob, weren’t you?” I asked him. My voice was a little louder than a whisper, but still very quiet.

“Bella, you have to understand. Wolves are volatile and run purely on their emotions. They aren’t safe. I’m only thinking of your safety.” I was shaking my head before he had finished his poor explanation.

Getting a little worked up, I ended up signing as well as whispering harshly. “Vampires are volatile and run purely on instinct. They play with their food and they relish in it. The wolves are protectors, meant to keep the humans safe. I learned that much from the legends myself.” At Edward’s wounded look, I softened my features and laid my hands on either side of his face, kneeling at his side. “You and Peter and your family...You can be just as dangerous but you’re not. Understand? The wolves _can_ be dangerous, but they’re not. Jake is my _very best friend_ and has been there for me every step of the way, no matter my attitude, no matter if he didn’t know what I was going through or if he did. He was there. I don’t care if he turned into a fire breathing dragon. He would _never_ hurt me. Ever.”

Finally looking contrite, as if my words had sunk into his head as slow as molasses, Edward looked down at his lap then peeked up at my through his lashes. “You’re absolutely right, love. Please forgive me. I only worry about you. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you, now that I’ve found you.”

He pulled my hands off his face only to hold them firmly in his. I stayed kneeling beside him but sat my butt on my ankles. His eyes were intense and it made things tingle. I wondered what it would be like to see those eyes, that intense burning, staring at me from above me. Giving myself to him would be easy. He was someone I trusted, surprisingly - even though it’s been so fast - and he was someone I was falling in love with. I’d never ever had that and I found that I really wanted it.

Without a word, Edward wrapped one arm around my hips and another behind my shoulders, spinning us so that I was on my back and he was hovered above me. I stared up at him, loving the look in his eyes as he stared back at me. “Is this okay?” He whispered. I nodded and his face dropped, lips pressing to mine. I kissed him back with a fervor I’d never felt before. His body hovered over me, not touching me except where his arms were still wrapped around me. My hands went to his hair, my fingers grasping and pulling as I let the feelings course through me.

When he pulled back, I frowned but at Edward’s dazed smile, I whispered a giggle and relaxed. “I should let you get ready for bed.” He said thickly. I loved the sound of arousal in his voice. “Charlie’s getting up to use the bathroom and he forgot to tell you something so he’ll be coming in. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He breathed quickly into my ear before placing a kiss there. He was gone a moment later and I just had enough time to pull my comforter over me as I heard the bathroom toilet flush.

A knock on the door and a quick peek in, Charlie opened the door wider at my wave and smile. “I forgot to tell ya, Bells.” He started, his voice gruff with sleep. “We’re going to Billy’s tomorrow. I know I said you could go to Rosalie’s but can you go later or Sunday instead?” He wiped his eyes with his palms.

Damn. I’d wanted to spend time with Edward but I knew Charlie wanted me to spend time with him. I’d have eternity with Edward. I wouldn’t have Charlie forever, unfortunately.

“Sure, Dad.” I whispered with a smile. His sleepy eyes widened and he rushed over to me.

“Bells!” He choked out. “You talked!”

I nodded and felt the tears prick my eyes painfully as a blush crept over my cheeks. I loved that I could make him smile like I’d just given him the best present ever. “Yeah, I think I’m going to be okay. I’m trying, Dad.”

Leaning down, he nearly crushed me with his hug and I wrapped my arms around him awkwardly as I tried to keep covered. I didn’t want him to see that I hadn’t changed for bed yet and it was getting close to two thirty in the morning. He kissed my cheek and when he pulled back to stand up, I saw he was trying to hide the tears in his eyes. I looked down and flattened my hand over my comforter, giving him a moment to compose himself.

“That’s good, kiddo. That’s real good. I’m so proud of you.” He said with emotion thick in his voice. I met his eyes once more and smiled shyly. “Goodnight, sweetheart. Get some sleep, sorry to bother you.”

As he turned toward the door, I made sure my voice could be heard over the squeak in my bedroom door. “You’re never a bother, Dad. Love you.”

Clearing his throat, he didn’t look back but stopped for a moment. “Love you too.” I could hear the tears in his voice and it formed a lump in my throat.

When I heard Charlie’s bedroom door shut, I got out of bed and gathered my sleep clothes, wiping the tears from my face.

This was progress, I thought to myself as I readied for bed. Charlie and I were like two peas in a pod and I knew I’d have to do much better so that he could have all he could with me before I couldn’t see him for a while. I had to tell him about that and I was nervous. How do you tell your father you were going to die so that you could live forever?

...Though maybe it would go better than when Peter’d told him I was just going to die. I hadn’t been there for that conversation but my dad had been nearly inconsolable for a month after that phone call. Jake had told me that Embry’s mom had been there for him. At least he had someone to look after him before I could come home. I hadn’t met Embry’s mom yet and I wondered if I would. I didn’t even know her name. It had all been hush hush, even when I had tried teasing Charlie about getting a girlfriend. He’d stammered, blushed, and grunted, giving me no real answer.

Snuggled down in my bed, I drifted off with the scents of my boyfriend - que girlie giggle - wafting into my nose and psyche, giving me a dreamless, restful sleep. I was woken up to the slam of the front door at eight a.m. as Charlie went out for his Saturday morning run, the smells of coffee and Edward filling the room. I stretched before I opened my eyes and startled when I realized I wasn’t alone. My eyes popped open and I gasped when I saw Edward smiling down at me. He was leaning against the pillows, a respectable distance away as I slept, looking the picture of ease, I noticed as my eyes took him in...If it weren’t for the bulge in his denim jeans. I blushed and averted my eyes.

Edward chuckled and I smiled before darting out of the bed, completely forgetting the state of my undress. I had only chosen a skimpy old white tank top that was full of holes and threadbare and a pair of black bikini panties. I blushed to the roots of my hair as I snatched my robe off the back of my bedroom door before running to the bathroom. Edward’s musical laughter floated after me.

“What are you doing here so early?” I asked quietly as I settled down on my desk chair with a fresh cup of coffee, my robe tied tightly around my waist, my teeth and hair freshly brushed. I felt much better but was still embarrassed that he’d seen me that way. I’d never shown that much skin in front of anyone willingly and now he had seen the scars on my body. My upper arms and thighs had a good bit of flaws. I could only be thankful that I was at least wearing a tank top. My stomach was mutilated.

“You should never feel embarrassed around me, love. You’re beautiful no matter what you look like.” He reassured me. “I just couldn’t stay away and I’ve got to say, I’m glad that I didn’t. You’re absolutely stunning first thing in the morning.”

I sipped the hot, caramel sweetened goodness in the U-Dub coffee mug as I kept my eyes on him. He made me feel brazen and sexy, the look in his eyes so tender yet intense as he watched my every move. I knew I should feel like the prey to his predator but I felt like a lover instead. For some reason, the thoughts of my scars, my deformities, didn’t even register in my mind for another second. The way he looked at me seemed to cancel out any of the bad whatsoever.

I watched as Edward’s eyes widened while I set my half empty mug on my computer desk and stood slowly. I felt as if I wasn’t in my own body as my fingers untied the belt to the robe and I let it fall behind me, landing with a soft whoosh into the chair I’d just stood from. Edward’s eyes traveled over my body, pausing and lingering on my breasts, watching as my nipples beaded from the cool air.

“What...what are you doing, love?” Edward’s voice was strained and I watched with no small amount of amusement as the bulge in his pants twitched. “Bella.”

My eyes met his again and I blushed. I wasn’t quite sure he even wanted this, much less why I was being so forward. Suddenly, he was in front of me and his cool hands embraced my cheeks. “Don’t ever doubt my feelings for you. Whether it’s love or affection or…” His eyes hooded and his voice dropped an octave, sending a shiver down my spine. “sexual attentions. I will always, _always_ want you. I just don’t want you to do anything you’ll regret later. This is all your pace.”

He was literally the sweetest man in the world. “I can’t explain why I have these feelings so fast or how I can be this way with you, but I am ready.” I wondered if it was the mate bond, if it really was such a strong pull, or if I was just being a normal teenaged girl for once. I’d been such a late bloomer because of the hell I’d endured...I hadn’t even gotten my first period until after I’d been saved by Peter.

Jesus, I’d not known what was going on with me but the doctor assured me that a lot of women in the world didn’t get their periods until their later teen years.

I shook myself from those odd thoughts.

Here was a beautiful, sexy man who loved me, who wanted me. He looked at me like I was a precious stone. His fingers carded into my hair as he cupped the back of my head and pressed me into him, staring into my eyes. My curves fitted into him like the perfect puzzle piece and I pushed into him more, wanting to feel all of him. One hand drifted down my body, brushing along the side of my breast and gripping my hip as he pressed his lips to mine. My eyes fluttered closed as his chest rumbled with a growl, vibrating against me.

I could feel his erection pressed into the soft part of my stomach and pushed against him, making his growl deepen and his hand grip my hip tighter. The sensations he was creating in me were amazing. I’d never felt this way before. The lust that coursed through my body set my veins aflame and I never wanted this to end. Suddenly on my back on my bed, I gasped when I realized Edward had stripped his shirt and my hands went straight to his chest, tracing the firm contours of his body. He shivered as my fingertips learned him and he bent over me to kiss my lips softly.

“Can I touch you, Bella? I’ll go slow and at your pace. I’ll never push you.” He asked, his eyes honest and hopeful.

I wanted him to.

“Please.” I whispered, never ceasing my touches to his skin.

Tentatively, Edward traced my cheek and neck, down over my shoulder, as he held himself over me on one arm. His eyes followed his movements and my hands dropped to my sides so he could explore. I watched him carefully for his reaction. My skin was riddled with scars and burn marks but he didn’t seem disgusted by them. He looked at me with awe and it made me feel pretty. The soft touches made goosebumps rise on my skin and I shuddered as his fingertips traced over my clothed side.

I let out a breathy whimper when his fingers played with the hem of my worn tank top and he paused, looking into my eyes. I closed mine and breathed in deeply but before I could gather the courage to nod at him, he decided on a different course. His hand gingerly cupped me between my thighs and waited. When my eyes opened I saw the question in his and this time I did nod. My knees fell open on either side of his hips, though he didn’t bear down on me. His body continued hovering over me, barely brushing against my skin.

I let my hands hesitantly touch his sides and I relished in the way his skin jumped at my touch. His fingers gently started caressing me over my panties and my breath started coming in faster pants. We stared into each other’s eyes as he touched me so carefully. My hips started to move, slowly of their own accord, and his eyes lit up.

“You’re so warm, Bella. So soft.” He murmured.

Tracing the inner side of my panties, his fingers dipped inside and when his cool skin touched my slick lips, I almost came undone. My eyes closed as my head pushed back into the comforter and I inhaled sharply at the pure ecstasy that traveled through me. Never had a touch felt so good on my body.

“Oh, love. You feel amazing.” Edward breathed.

My hooded eyes opened as his fingers continued caressing my center and I felt the tight coil in my lower abdomen tighten further. My inner walls fluttered and pulsed with the nearness of my orgasm. Edward pushed down onto me slightly, letting me feel the pulsation of his own arousal.

It only turned me on further.

“You’re so wet for me.” He spoke quietly, his voice deeper with his lust, as he kissed up the side of my neck before his lips found mine. A single finger entered me and that’s all it took for the waves of pure heaven to crash over me. My core tightened and squeezed his finger as my hips bucked into his hand and I felt his erection jump in anticipation of his own climax. I pressed my hips into him, bucking as I rode my orgasm to completion.

A moan slipped from my lips and Edward gasped. I felt the cool wetness against my naked thigh as he came inside his pants, breathing heavily into my neck. His finger slipped from my panties and he adjusted himself before lying next to me on the bed, his face close to mine.

“Oh God.” I whispered.

“Oh God, indeed love. You’re so beautiful when you come.”

The words, though naughty, sent another wave of lust through me and he chuckled.

“We don’t have time for more right now. Your father is almost here from his jog.” His voice was still breathy.

I groaned quietly. “Please don’t mention my father after we’ve done something like that.” I whined.

The laugh that escaped his mouth could be recorded as a best selling single, it was that musical. “Sorry, love.”

“I need to get ready to go with my dad.” I told him a few moments later.

Edward nodded and stood from the bed, holding his hand out to help me up. My legs felt weak and I felt giddy. “Just please promise me that you’ll be careful. If Jacob is as moody as you say then he may be close to phasing. Please don’t entice his anger, love. Promise me.” His eyes were wide with a building panic and I cupped his face as I whispered reassuringly.

“I promise. I’ll be on my best behavior.” I swore.

“Can I see you tonight?” He asked eagerly as his hands found my hips.

“If we get back before too late, I will text you. Could you have Rosalie pick me up?” I asked, my voice still a quiet murmur. I was feeling a lot more safe in his presence now - in Forks in general - and didn’t mind letting my voice strengthen. I figured that there would be less picking on me if Rosalie were the one to show up to bring me to the Cullens than Edward. My dad was already having a field day with me having a boyfriend.

I was actually surprised that he wasn’t more leery.

“Of course. Text one of us and she will be here in minutes. I’ll miss you. Please be careful.” He stressed.

I pulled the black long sleeved steampunk dress from my closet before laying it on the back of my computer chair. “I promise, Edward. I’ll be careful.” I said turning to him. I saw his eyes lingering on the dress.

“What will you wear with that?” He asked curiously, though I noted a touch of jealousy.

I smiled as I gathered the rest of my outfit for the day. A bright red rose clip for my hair that I would pull into a high ponytail, kneehigh black flat footed boots with large bronze buckles on the sides, black pantyhose, and a bright red bust cardigan. The finishing touch will be my Rockabilly glasses, of course.

“You’ll look beautiful, love. As always.” He smiled softly.

The front door slammed and we heard Charlie stomp into the kitchen. Edward grabbed me into a tight hug and kissed my temple. “I’ll see you later. I love you.” He said, staring dreamily into my eyes.

My heart fluttered. “I love you too. Bye, Edward.” I whispered.

The crooked smile he gave me just before he jumped out my window made my knees weak.

I don’t care how much I was warned, I was not ready or prepared in the least for Jake’s negative reaction to everything. First he was pissed off because I tripped on the leg of the kitchen chair he’d just stood from. Then he was pissed off because his father told him to take out the trash. Finally, what sent him over the edge and barrelling out the back door and into the forest was when Sam Uley and Leah Clearwater showed up at the front door.

I threw my Marvel purse across my room and it landed on the bed with a soft thump. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have thrown it, since it’s got my cell phone in there and it could’ve broken had the purse landed on the floor or against the wall. I flopped back onto my bed and covered my face with my palms. Charlie walked in the open bedroom door and leaned his shoulder against the jamb.

“He’ll be fine, Bells. Just give him a few days. Boy seems like he’s going through PMS or something doesn’t it…” He said more than asked and I cracked a smile as I sat upright on the bed.

“Yeah.” I said quietly. “I know he’s got a lot on his mind but it still hurts that he’s taking his anger out on everyone.” Though I knew the reasonings for his moodiness now, it did in fact sting. His glares and huffs, avoidance of our usually friendly touches, even snapping at me for trying to be supportive. I’d eventually given up and sat quietly.

Charlie never even asked why I’d reverted back to signing when we were at the Black’s household, and I was glad. I didn’t want to tell him about the wolves. Sure, he knew about the Cold Ones from the legends but I didn’t know for sure if he knew about the Spirit Protectors and I wasn’t about to be the one to let the cat out of the bag. I didn’t know those people and I wasn’t comfortable giving them my voice. They may not have been in the house or even near but if their hearing was as good as a real animals then I’m sure they could’ve heard my whisper or quiet murmurs from a mile away. They didn’t need to hear me talking about Edward or Rosalie, confirming that this little girl plays with vampires.

They'd surely kick me off their land.

When Sam and Leah had turned up, they'd practically ignored me. The mood had turned heavy when Charlie thought I wasn't listening and told Billy he was worried sick about my CJD hitting suddenly. They murmured quietly over it and I was a little peeved they'd done it while Sam and Leah were there. I sat in the kitchen, nursing a hot cup of coffee, giving them time to finish their conversation. As Charlie and I were leaving, Leah touched my shoulder and looked at me with pity. I glared at her before turning my face to the floor.

"I hate being pitied." I said under my breath. When Charlie walked out the door, Leah grabbed my arm gently and forced me to a stop. I kept my glare on my booted feet.

"I don't pity you, Swan." She whispered in my ear. "Good luck."

Then she let go of me and grabbed Sam's hand, preceeding me out of the house.

Shaking myself from my thoughts, I turned my attention back to Charlie.

“Well, I’m gonna go visit Tiff. You gonna be okay here by yourself or are you going over to the Cullens?” Dad asked as he pushed off the door jamb and stood straight, adjusting his button down blue shirt and smoothing his hands over his denim backside.

“Tiff as in Tiffany? The psychologist you wanted me to talk to?” I asked curiously.

Charlie’s face reddened and I smiled widely. “Yeah.” He answered gruffly.

“You are so adorable, old man. Go see your girlfriend.” I said with humor thickly laced in my quiet voice.

Shuffling awkwardly, he waved his hand dismissively and shrugged one shoulder. “Okay, you have a good evening, sweetheart. Just text me and let me know what time you’ll be home.”

I stood up and walked over to hug him. Pulling back, I figured I’d bite the bullet and maybe make Alice one happy girl. “Since we went to Jake’s earlier, could I stay the night with Rosalie since they’re taking me shopping anyway tomorrow?” I knew my wide eyes were filled with hope. I didn’t want him to know that it had anything to do with sleeping in Edward’s arms.

“I’ve already told you, Bells, you don’t gotta ask me permission. You’re eighteen years old. Just use your best judgement okay.” I heard the not-so-hidden warning.

Rolling my eyes a little, I blew a wayward strand of hair from my face. “Of course, Dad. Have a good time with Tiffany Call!” I taunted him with a big smile. “Will Embry end up being my little brother?” I almost giggled at the bulging eyes Charlie sported.

Sputtering a little he cleared his throat and stepped backwards out of my room. “He’s a bit too large to be your little brother, Bells.” Then he turned swiftly and skipped down the stairs quickly.

I really wanted to call after him that that wasn’t an answer but I was too busy laughing at his reaction. He threw a “see ya later, love ya” up the stairs just before the front door shut and I started for my phone, ready to text Edward. Noting the time was only three in the afternoon, I grabbed my Big Bang Theory duffel bag from under my bed and put a set of night clothes in it along with an outfit for tomorrow. Just as I was zipping the bag up after placing my toiletry bag in it, Alice and Edward came through my bedroom window. Alice’s face was smiling brightly and Edward smiled at me as if I was a breath of fresh air.

“No need to pack, Bella! I’ve got you everything you will need at the house.” At my questioning look, she rushed on. “All your toiletries and some clothes for you to try on. I love buying for everyone in the family and after Rosalie and Edward raved about your Rockabilly look, I just had to find things I thought you’d like! Just wait until you see…” Her excited rambling was cut off with Edward’s large palm over her mouth. She rolled her eyes up to him and shrugged before he let go and she grinned at me. ‘Just wait.’ She mouthed at me. Edward sighed heavily and shoved Alice lightly to the side.

Embracing me tightly, he kissed my forehead. “Don’t mind Alice. She is the equivalent of a human on fourteen shots of espresso.” I giggled behind my hand as my other gripped his shirt to keep him against me.

“Fourteen espressos would kill a human.” I said with a smile.

“You can see how Alice could kill a human with her hyperactivity, then.” He smiled.

“How did you know get here so fast, I just sent the text.” I asked as I emptied the duffel I’d just packed and threw it back under my bed to lay with the dust bunnies.

Alice waved her hand dismissively. “Oh I knew you were going to have us come soon so we were already on our way when you sent it along.” She wasn’t making any sense.

“You knew? How?” I watched as Edward side eyed his small sibling and I looked between the two of them as I waited for an answer. Their lips were moving fast and the buzzing bumble bee noise was back. “Loud enough for me to hear, please.” I sighed.

“Sorry, love. I was just telling Alice that I hadn’t gotten a chance to tell you about her gift yet.” My eyebrows raised and I looked at the tiny dark haired girl expectantly, anticipating something great with a smile.

Seeing me at ease, Alice smiled as well. “I’m what’s called a seer. I can see the future but only certain variations of it. Unlike Peter who gets weird information in his head that will eventually play out no matter what, my visions are both vocal and imagery that can change based on someone’s decision.” Her quick chatter was light and happy.

“That’s really great. So you saw that I decided to text Edward?” She shook her head but said nothing. I rolled my wrist at her, waiting.

“I saw Charlie deciding to go see his girlfriend! That set off a mini chain of events, you would text Edward, Edward would text you back, then he would come himself, bypassing Rosalie altogether since I would have told him that Charlie wasn’t here, and then he would get here and you’d be packed and downstairs waiting. I figured I’d at least get here in time to save you from lugging your bag downstairs and having to bring it back up. So are you ready to go? I have so much I wanna do!” She hadn’t taken a breath the whole time and I was back to my first thought about her.

I hoped I could handle her.

Once we were at the Cullens and Esme had given me a hug and a cup of tea - and gushed that I was speaking aloud - Alice tried to usher me up the stairs to her bedroom. All of the others had gone off to hunt and Peter was in Seattle getting his own meal. The southern gent only saved damsels in distress so he only preyed in large cities. The bubbly girl was getting on my nerves but I didn’t want to be rude to her. She seemed like such a sweet person but I could only handle so much! As I was turning around to try and let her down easily, she stopped speaking - about what, I had no clue - and spun around to face me. Her thin sculpted eyebrows were pulled down and her lips thinned.

“But...I want to see how you look in just a couple of things! Please? I promise I’ll let you be with Edward and Rosalie in a little bit. Please, Bella?”

That pout. It may be the death of me.

Edward chuckled at my thoughts and I nodded with a long drawn out sigh. “Just a couple please, Alice.” I whispered. I felt a little ungrateful that I was reacting this way but I wasn't used to such forceful bubbliness in my face.

Her shout of glee and grasp of my hand was loud and tight and Edward scolded Alice as he walked behind us up the stairs. I really didn’t mind trying on a couple of outfits but I hadn’t seen Rosalie yet and I wanted to hang out with her before I shut myself away with Edward later.

Walking into Alice’s room, the pink frill of it still hurting my eyes, I noticed that she’d added mannequins that were weighted down with retro and vintage costume jewelry and dresses or outfits that I would drool over if my eyes hadn’t caught sight of the red strapless dress on the smallest mannequin in the corner of the room. The bright yellow and orange flowers on the flared poof of the dress, the layered ruffle on the bust, the smooth velvet heels that sat underneath. The dress Alice had worn the first day I’d met her.

“Wow!” I breathed in awe as my feet carried me closer. My fingers hovered over the fabric, scared to get my oily fingers on it at all. This was the real deal. This was not an eBay knockoff!

Alice giggled and I noticed Edward standing beside me. “You like it?” He asked, almost uncertainly. I raised an eyebrow and stared at him pointedly.

“Can you not hear how much I like it? I _love_ it!” I threw my arms around his neck and he caught me by the waist, bringing my face level with his. I kissed him with everything I had inside me and he pulled me closer to him. I’m not sure how much time went by, but Alice ended up clearing her throat.

“Please don’t make my room smell like that.” She muttered as she busied herself with the other dresses and outfits on the mannequins.

Feeling confused, I let go of Edward and slithered down his body to the floor. “Like what?” I glanced at Edward and he shook his head while he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Your arousal, Bella. I don’t want that in here. Go to Edward’s room.” Her mood had changed quickly like Jake’s and I didn’t want to deal with more moody people so I started walking toward the door. I wasn’t sure what I did but I couldn’t handle it.

“Sorry.” I whispered shortly.

Edward caught up to me and held my hand as we walked from the room. We silently walked down the stairs and out the back door before he spoke. “Don’t think it’s anything you did. Alice gets these moods sometimes. They’re rare but when they come on, it’s best to leave her alone. Between something that’s going on with her and Jasper and you spotted the dress I got for you before you paid attention to hers, it put her off. It’s not your fault. It has to do with being a vampire, not you. She’s always had a harder time controlling her emotions than the rest of us.”

I felt bad for that. It seemed that she’d put a lot of effort into dressing the mannequins and giving them costume jewelry and here I’d already fluffed it up. I didn’t mean to hurt her feelings.

He sat me down on the thick bench seat of the gazebo and pressed his body against my side. “Don’t feel bad. She will be fine. You’ll see. I can already hear her remorse for her snappy behavior.” He smiled.

I gave a small smile back, determined to put this out of my mind. If it really wasn’t my fault then there wasn’t anything I could do about it.

Edward and I walked the yard and inside the treeline for a couple of hours. He had brought my portfolio that I’d completely forgotten about and we both sketched, sitting on a large rock shoulder to shoulder by the Calawah River. By the time six thirty rolled around, Esme appeared, scaring me into almost tumbling off the rock before she caught me with apologies galore, and let me know that she’d made me a small dinner. I was grateful because I was starved. When we got into the house, it smelled heavenly though I noticed the rest of the family - who had returned - were scrunching their noses. Looking down at the large plate of shrimp scampi, I looked back at the vampires.

“This smells amazing. Stop scrunching your faces.” I scolded them. Esme beamed at my playful glare and ushered me to sit down and dig in. The family smoothed out their features, much to my amusement, but I could tell that for some reason this didn’t smell great to them.

Edward sat by me and explained. “It’s because of our heightened smell. The garlic bits and the seafood smell are definitely a million times stronger than you could imagine right now. It’s hell on our senses. The taste is even more revolting.” That made me sad. I loved eating.

I looked down at my meal, sucking up a stray buttery noodle, then looked back at Esme. “Why would you make such a potent meal if it bothers you so much?” I asked quietly.

Her eyes lit up and she sat on the other side of me as she explained how she had loved to cook as a human and for some reason the smells didn’t bother her heightened senses. She wasn’t sure if it was because it was a passion for her or what.

“Have you ever tasted it to see if you liked it?” Esme nodded slowly with a twisted look to her pretty features.

“Yes, it’s quite disgusting. Sad really, because I used to love sampling my cooking.” She sighed with a smile.

I enjoyed my meal and then Rosalie grabbed my attention. We played a boardgame with Emmett and Jasper while Edward and Alice sat off to the side and watched us fondly. I learned that those two weren’t allowed to play games with the rest of the family because of their abilities. Edward indignantly huffed while Alice complained that she couldn’t turn it off so it wasn’t her fault. Her mood seemed to have evened out and I sent her a small smile. It was nice spending time with a large family like this. The laughing and teasing that went on was extremely enjoyable and I found myself growing more and more attached as the evening wore on. Jasper mentioned that Peter wouldn’t be back until morning, having found himself a female to entertain. It would’ve been nice to have him around but I knew he would be around for eternity.

I learned so much about the family in those few hours. Jasper was quick witted and hilarious, using his ability to make everyone laugh when he did. Emmett was a huge child, always ready with a joke or bout of sarcasm. Carlisle, though quiet and reserved most of the time, had a heart bigger than Texas and could joke like the rest of them, seeming more like the twenty three year old he was than the thirty year old he portrayed. Esme was a mother hen, hovering around me and making sure I was comfortable. I ended up sitting in a small pile of the softest throw pillows on the floor around the coffee table while we played Monopoly.

I could see myself with these people for a very long time and looked forward to it.

I had to shove those thoughts aside as they reminded me that I needed to speak with Charlie tomorrow. I couldn’t put this off much longer. The disease could strike full force at any time and I didn’t want to have to spring it on him last minute. I decided that tomorrow’s shopping with Rosalie and Alice would have to be a quick trip. I couldn’t afford to miss any more time with my father. Tears pricked my eyes and I looked down, blinking rapidly trying to dispel them. Edward was behind me suddenly and held me to him. I gave him a watery smile.

“You’ll not leave him behind, Bella. I promise.” He reassured me.

I sniffled and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand, noticing that everyone was pretending not to notice my mini break.

“Thank you.” I whispered to them all.

Shortly after that, Monopoly was over and I followed Edward up to his room, saying goodnight to everyone. A large queen sized bed was occupying the space, leaving hardly any room on either side of the bed and I giggled in delight. The beautiful iron frame had metal roses and petals and shined a glossy black. The bedspread was black and silver thick stripes that looked like satin.

“Eager, are we?” I asked him with a playful smile. The intimate images that floated through my brain had me squirming on my toes and brushing my thighs together.

He grinned in response before shaking his head. “While that is an option, love, I got this with your comfort in mind. If you are going to spend the night, you’d be much more comfortable on this than my leather couch.” He explained as he hugged me close.

We laid on the bed together and soon I drifted off, happily surrounded in his calming scent.

The next morning and afternoon was a whirlwind that I could barely keep up with. Jake’s attitude was on my mind almost constantly but there wasn’t anything I could do about it so I tried to enjoy my time with my new friends. Rosalie had sprung me from bed at six, with - thankfully - a large styrofoam cup of coffee, and shoved me into the bathroom to change. The outfit she handed me was one I recognized off of one of the mannequins and I smiled lovingly as I fingered the fabric of the halter tank. The bright red tank fitted with skintight black and white polka dotted leggings and a cropped black leather jacket to fit would hug my curves and show a great deal of cleavage. I slipped on black kitten heels with the outfit after I dressed and Alice flitted into the bathroom to create a tight victory roll up-do with a large white carnation on the side of my head. Rosalie busied herself with my makeup and I gasped when she was done.

I’d never been this flawless. My skin looked creamy and bright, my cat eye eyeliner was perfectly swooped away from the corner of my eyes and my eyebrows were darkened, giving definition to the golden brown of my eyes.

We drove to Port Angeles instead of Seattle after I told them I really wanted to spend time with Charlie. Rosalie was extremely compassionate about that and though Alice pouted a bit, her mood never soured. After a couple hours of rigorous shopping in the few boutiques that Port A offered, the girls finally let me sit down for lunch and then we carried the many bags out to Rosalie’s BMW and headed back to Forks. I ended up with so much new clothing, I wasn’t sure when I would wear it all. When I voiced that concern, both of them laughed.

“You’ll be living a long time, Bella. You’ll have plenty of time!” I shrugged in agreeance. I supposed they were right. It would take some getting used to, reminding myself that I had the opportunity to live forever instead of dying sooner than later.

Back at my home after Edward dropped me off with a quick chaste kiss, I settled into the living room with Charlie. He had a goofy smile on his face when he saw how happy I was, though I wasn’t sure it was all to do with my own emotions than it was to do with the fact that he most likely spent the night with Tiffany. I handed him a beer and relaxed on the couch, putting my feet up. I fidgeted with my leather jacket as I sat there, unsure of how to start this conversation. I listened as Charlie told me very little about his evening and morning, how he took Tiffany out to breakfast at the diner and she voiced her concerns about me. He reassured her that I seemed to be flourishing and she expressed how happy that made her, offering any help she could give me. I brushed it off, still sure that she couldn’t help me with how involved I was with the supernatural. Sure, she was Embry’s mom, but did that mean she knew about the wolves? If she did, did she know about vampires as well? I wasn’t sure I wanted to bother taking the chance.

“So…I...I need to talk to you about so...something.” I stuttered in a quiet whisper.

Charlie muted the television and gave me his undivided attention, swiveling his rocking recliner so he faced me and leaned forward to place his elbows on his knees. “What is it, sweetheart?”

I blushed and looked down, crossing and uncrossing my legs, leaning forward to grab my soda off the coffee table and take a sip to wet my whistle before I leaned back and did my best to keep eye contact with my father.

“You know...that I don’t have much longer before...before my disease kicks in…” I started. I took a deep breath, not missing the way my dad’s muscles tensed up with the words I spoke. “This is so hard.” I muttered under my breath.

Charlie stood from the recliner and came to sit beside me, draping his arm around my shoulders and looking me in the face, searching for words that I wasn’t able to speak. He waited patiently and I gathered the courage from his fatherly touch and steady eyes. Looking at his features, the crow’s feet around his eyes from a lifetime of laughter, the thick mustache on his lip, his golden chocolate eyes that matched my own. I gathered the courage to speak, knowing I couldn’t leave him behind, ever. I had to speak before I lost my courage. He couldn’t react that bad, could he?

“I am going to become a vampire…” I said with a quiet firmness.


	9. Strange Cosmos

Charlie stared at me.

He blinked once. Then blinked again. I waited with bated breath, my heart pounding in my ears, feeling the thick sludge of blood flow through all of my limbs. I felt weighed down as I wondered how he would react. I probably should have asked Alice how this would play out but then noted with relief that I was glad I hadn’t. Maybe that would’ve been cheating or made me even more nervous had I known he would react badly. Just having him sitting here staring at me was hard enough.

It would almost be better if he screamed and yelled or cried.

I stared back at him, wondering if my nervousness showed on my face. Probably. I had always had trouble keeping my emotions off of my face. Everyone told me I was an open book. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Dad? Charlie?” I whispered. “Are you okay?” I brought one hand up and touched his face and it seemed to snap him out of whatever thoughts he was trapped in. He slouched forward, his arm getting heavy and dragging me into his side where he rested his chin on my head. I moved slightly to get more comfortable and rested my cheek against his side, his bicep almost crushing my face to him but I didn’t mind. He needed this and I could give it to him.

I’d give him anything.

Blowing out a long, stressful breath, my dad spoke. “A vampire. You’re going to turn into a vampire. Could it really be that easy?” He paused for so long, I almost wondered if I should have confirmed it again. “I think I’ve got a pretty good idea of what that means, but could you do your old man a favor and run it by me, kiddo?” He kept his voice monotone, as parents were able to do, emotionless so that I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, which was aided in the fact that I couldn’t move my face to look at his.

“Well, one of the Cullens will have to bite me.” I started but paused when my dad flinched. I waited a moment but he didn’t protest so I continued. “I’ll burn for three days, they say it’s like walking through hell only you can’t move.” He sucked in a sharp breath. “The venom that will change me will wipe out the Creutzfeldt-Jakobs and I will be - apparently - perfect. No scars, no pain, no _dying_.” I whispered painfully. Swallowing around the lump that was forming, I held back a sob. “I won’t be able to see you for a little while, Dad, but I won’t die from CJD. I’ll be able to live forever.”

It was silent for a long time as tears tracked my face and soaked into my father’s shirt. He held me close to him, never letting go, as his own emotions overtook him.

Thick with tears, I thought I detected a twinge of hopefulness in my dad’s voice. “You can live forever with no pain?” He whispered.

I nodded the best that I could and his arm tightened to the point that my cheeks were squashed between his bicep and side.

“Bells...I love you.” He choked out.

“I love you too, Dad.” I said with a quiet reverence.

He unwrapped us and then faced me, grasping my shoulders and staring into my eyes again. “Okay.” Was all he said and I stared at him some more.

Clearing my throat from the lump lodged there, I questioned him. “Okay?”

He nodded his head and kissed mine. “Please, yes. Dear God, please yes.” He whispered happily. “I want you to live a long, beautiful, happy life. You deserve to have your hell wiped away. You’re flawless as you are, kiddo but to know that you’ll be out there somewhere, no more scars, no more disease...I could die happy right now.” He hugged me to him so tight that I almost struggled for air but gave up, hugging him back just as tightly.

“You cannot die right now. You need to live for a long ass time, Dad.” I muffled into his shoulder.

He barked a laugh. “Just ‘cause you’ll be the strongest predator on earth doesn’t mean you can swear to your old man.” He mock scolded.

Releasing me from the hug, he sat back with his beer and took a long pull. I sipped my soda, thankful for the fizzy liquid as it cleansed my throat with sweet, sugary goodness.

“So when are you going to do this? You know, you don’t really have to wait. The school is aware of the dormant disease and what could happen so you not going to school isn’t a big deal if you want to get everything sorted out instead. Hell, if you’re gonna live forever, you can always graduate another day.” He said so nonchalantly that I almost choked on my drink.

He was right of course, I didn’t need to worry about school. The whispers, the stares, the petty kids. I thought about how soon I would like to be turned, to have to leave my dad for months after just getting him back, then I remembered something Edward said about a treaty. I knew the wolves had to be alerted but I couldn’t tell Charlie about them. It was not my secret to tell.

“I’m not sure, but I agree about no school. I think I’d rather spend all the time I can with you, while I can. There’s a lot that needs to be taken care of before I can turn anyway, so we have some time.”

Charlie shook his head. “You don’t have to worry about the Quileutes.” At my absolute shock, he smiled widely. “What, you think I know about Cold Ones now but not the wolves? They don’t hide very well and the shaking Jake’s been doing with the mood swings and then Sam shows up out of nowhere? I’m no fool, Bells. Besides, Embry’s one. That’s all Tiff complains about is how he’s never home. Always patrolling.”

I gasped, holding my fingers to my lips. “She knows?” Dang, I really could have talked to her about everything.

“Of course she knows. You can’t hide the fact that he grew eight inches in a damn month and runs a fever all the time and his attitude is surlier than a damn bear.” He scoffed. “Can’t hide that from your momma.” He finished with a nod.

“So what do you mean, I don’t have to worry about the Quileutes?” I asked, tentatively.

“Just what I said. Billy and I talked about it. Sam and Leah and Jake all know what you’ve gone through and will...or could have...gone through. Billy and Sam agree that living forever as a leech - I guess that’s what they call the vampires - is better than dying from this damn disease that’s inside you. I didn’t know much about what they were talking about but...anyway. They were going to talk to the Cullens last night and then come to you to talk you into it. Guess they’ll be surprised at how easy that’ll be.” He chuckled as he finished his beer and set it on the coffee table. “Come ‘ere.” He directed.

I put my soda can on the table as well and leaned into him again. He held me close but not as tight as he had before. He unmuted the television and we watched an afternoon of Big Bang Theory reruns. I got up from the couch to make dinner around five and Charlie asked me to make triple. I figured that was because we would have the company he told me about and I smiled when the doorbell rang as the casseroles were coming out of the oven.

To my absolute surprise, not only was Billy being wheeled in by Sam with Leah trailing uncertainly behind him, Paul, Jared, Embry, and Jake were with them. Each of them was dressed in cutoff shorts and tight tees of various colors. I was glad then that I’d made four casseroles total and a huge salad. The house was filled with laughter and loud chatter as everyone greeted my father and me. Leah gave me a hug and this time, I didn’t feel pitied. Paul came over and his eyes were the softest I’d ever seen from the large angry male. He kissed my cheek, which stunned me even more because I’d only ever been in his presence once before. Sam clapped a hand on my shoulder and bent low to look me in the eyes.

“We’ve spoken with the Cullens.” He said in a deep strong voice. At my nod, he continued. “You can become a vampire but you must sign the treaty and promise to stay off our lands. You’ll be able to come and go to Forks as you please after you’re controlled, but please stay off our lands.”

“Of course, Sam. Thank you.” At my quick signing, questions flashed through his eyes.

Paul came to stand beside me. “She said of course, Sam. Thank you.” Then he turned to me. “The Cullens told us you’d been offered a place in their family. We’re glad ‘cause that made the conversation go quick.”

I shook my head at him in awe as he turned away toward the food. Jake stood in front of me next with Embry and I gawked. Jake’s beautiful hair was gone and he had grown so much. His body was more muscularly toned and he had a tattoo on his arm, like the rest of the wolves. “So you’re okay now?” I asked with my hands. I stayed back from him, cautious of all the warnings from Edward and remembering my promise to keep myself safe.

Jake looked down on me with sad eyes, his full lips pulled down into a frown. “I’m so sorry, Bells. My attitude was shit and now I’m a monster. I’m so sorry.” The tears in his eyes made mine tear up as well and I stepped into him to embrace him, forgetting that I needed to be safe in the knowledge that my best friend needed comfort. I felt more than saw all the wolves stop what they were doing and come closer. Jake was a newly phased wolf, I could tell. The heat emanating off of him was intense. He hesitantly wrapped me up in his arms and bent low to lay his cheek on the top of my head. I hugged my best friend until the warmth got to me and sweat beaded on my forehead. When I pulled away, his burden looked a little lighter.

“You’re not a monster. You’re a protector.” I spoke quietly but firmly, not using my hands at all this time. Jake needed my voice. “You are my best friend and you always will be...Even when I stink to you. I love you, Jake.”

“I don’t care if you smell like a vat of hot garbage, Bells. You’ll always be my best friend.” He hugged me to him again and Leah sighed dramatically. “I’d rather you be a member of the walking dead than actually dead, Loca.” He said ignoring Leah altogether.

“Can we eat yet, I’m starved.” Her snarky tone was canceled out by the playful glint in her eyes and the banter that ensued from then on kept a smile on my face all evening.

All four pans of casserole were wiped clean before the end of dinner and Leah helped me wash while the boys dried and put the dishes away. It was so nice to have another group of people I could be with. I’d spoken so much tonight, even having to raise my voice to be heard over the cacophony of noise, that my throat sort of burned and when Paul noticed me holding a hand to my throat as I sat on the living room couch, he disappeared into the kitchen, coming back out moments later with a hot cup of tea. I smiled at him as he sat next to me, squishing me between him and Jake.

“Just think, that burn in your throat will never go away after you turn.” He commented matter of factly.

I rolled my eyes and elbowed him in the side. He had been a fast friend and I liked his playful sarcasm and quick wit. He seemed like a bit of a bad boy but he had such a good heart, I could tell.

“It’s a small price to pay to know I won’t end up a drooling, dying mess.” I murmured. Paul nodded his agreeance and I smiled. “Thank you for this.” I said, lifting the mug up before tilting it to my lips. He watched me sip then moved it over to the coffee table for me.

“You’re welcome, babe.” He said.

“Oh boy, here we go.” Embry said at length. At my raised eyebrow, he elaborated. “When Paul likes someone he always butters them up before calling them babe and making a move.”

At Embry’s laughing tone, Jake started trembling and Paul snarled at him, lifting me up and carrying me into the kitchen while I saw Sam and Leah jump into action with Jared and Embry as they pulled Jake out the door quickly. A pained howl erupted from the treeline and I squirmed out of Paul’s hold, rushing to the back door.

“Bella, no! Stop!” Paul yelled as he ran after me. I was tiny and slipped from his grasp, racing to the tree line where a russet colored wolf lay on his belly, whining. Paul grabbed me from behind and held me to his chest, stopping me in my tracks as I stared at the wolf in front of me. Jared and Embry were gone but Leah stood beside a large black wolf, weaving her fingers through his fur.

“He won’t hurt me.” I whispered. Paul’s fingers tightened around my arms and I tried not to wince. “He won’t hurt me.” I stated stronger.

“He won’t mean to, but he could.” Paul said.

I shook my head, never taking my eyes off of Jake’s. “I know he won’t. Let go of me, please.” I knew he was holding me back for safety and I was so thankful that so many people cared about me but I just knew in my gut that Jake would never hurt me.

Paul’s warm fingers left my arms and I darted forward, slowing my pace as I neared the overly large animal that housed my best friend.

“Jake.” I whispered as I held my hand out toward his muzzle. He lifted his head and sniffed me before sneezing. “Yeah, I smell like Paul again, huh?” He pulled his lips over his teeth and at my wide eyes, Leah spoke.

“That’s a wolfy grin.”

I let her words soothe me. He was still my Jake. He wasn’t some volatile wild animal. “Can I touch you?” I asked. His nod was my answer and I knelt beside him in the thick green ferns and fallen leaves. I looked up at Leah and then started running my fingers through Jake’s fur the way Leah was doing to Sam. A large rumbling echoed off the copse of trees and I giggled. “You purr too!”

Jake’s eyes narrowed at me and I stuck my tongue out at him.

We sat there for a while, Sam hovering over us, keeping a vigil over his newest packmate, Leah standing silently by her man’s side. Paul ended up going back into the house with Billy and Charlie and I just relished in spending time with my best friend...Even if he was a wolf at the moment.

A short while later when the chill in the air penetrated my leggings and thin leather jacket, Jake phased back unexpectedly and I squeaked as I covered my eyes. He laughed a loud deep laugh and let me know when his shorts were in place before helping me up. I swiped my hands at my knees and butt to get the bracken litter off of me and Sam phased back as well, though thankfully he had gone further into the bushes. We all went back into the house and after making sure I was really okay with Jake being a wolf, everyone left. Jake then Paul each gave me a kiss on the cheek, though Jake shoved Paul out of the house with a snarl and Paul’s braying laugh echoed into the night’s air. I rolled my eyes at their behavior. Leah had told me how Paul had always been a touchy feely kind of guy and it didn’t really bother me. He was platonic and respectful, playful and sarcastic. I knew that I’d have a good friend in him, even after I was changed.

I ran upstairs after Charlie went to bed and took a shower before I even went into my bedroom. Wrapping myself in my robe with a towel around my head to soak up the water in my hair, I padded barefoot into my bedroom and gasped, covering my mouth, when I saw Edward on my bed with unruly hair.

The smile on his face when I entered my room the way I was dressed was downright devilish. The blush that covered my cheeks was bright.

“Be right back.” I said quietly as I rushed to my dresser and grabbed a tee and bed shorts...actual shorts this time instead of just panties. Once I was dressed in the bathroom and I’d brushed my hair and teeth, I discarded the towel in the hamper under the bathroom window and hung my robe on the back of the door.

Edward patted the bed and I joined him, snuggling into his side. “I’m glad you showered, love. The wolves smell disgusting.”

I shivered as his breath caressed my skin and he chuckled. “They smell fine to me.” I sighed as I entwined my fingers with his.

“Hmm, I suppose they would. What do they smell like?” His fingers danced up and down the side of my arm. My head laid against his chest and I let my eyes flutter closed as I enjoyed his touch.

“They all smell like the woods or freshly fallen leaves but each one has their own unique smell. Mostly like woods and musk.” I murmured.

His voice was quieter now. “How do I smell to you, love?” He almost sounded insecure. I smiled wistfully as I remembered how woozy I felt after sniffing him for the first time. I have always been a sucker for really good smells. My mother smelled like coffee beans and chocolate covered strawberries. My dad smells like his Brute aftershave and leather. Jake smelled like motor oil and musk and his dad smelled like cedar wood shavings.

But Edward’s smell. The sharp sting of cumin was shadowed with balsam wood and cool like lemon verbena. “You smell like the best thing in the world to me.” I said happily, knowing he’d heard my inner monologue. His arms tightened around me and he snuggled his nose into my neck, breathing deeply.

I wondered. “What do I smell like to you?”

Dragging in another long inhale of my scent, he didn’t bother lifting his nose from my skin and his lips tickled me as he spoke. “Calming and relaxing, your scent is as creamy as your skin, love. Fresh lavender with warm vanilla musk and bergamot.” He whispered reverently, licking my neck and moaning softly.

I giggled. I couldn’t help it and he lifted his head, looking at me curiously. “What on earth is so funny?” He asked, bewildered.

“I smell like Chamomile and Earl Grey tea?” I asked with a giggle.

His smile was wide and his ocher eyes lightened in his happiness. “You never cease to amaze me, love.” Chuckling into my neck again he opened his mouth and nibbled on the skin there, causing my giggles to change to gasps of pleasure.

We couldn’t do much with Charlie in the house so I scolded him lightly and he sat back looking smug as he leaned against my pillows with his hands laced behind his head. I checked out his body from head to foot and smirked when I saw the bulge in his pants. Now I was the one with the smug smile. I scooted back against the headboard beside him and crossed my legs, holding onto my knees.

“So, how long have you been here anyway?” I asked finally.

His eyes hardened. “I was here for quite a while actually. Not in the house, of course. The dogs would have smelled me out. I was out in the forest.” His voice had lost all it’s companionability and I frowned.

“What’s the problem?” I asked.

“I’m not a fan of the way you let Paul touch you or talk to you. I’m also not a fan of the way Jake almost lost his shit, sitting right next to you.” He grumbled jealously.

I rolled my eyes internally but he glared at me. Guh, guess he would see it whether it was internal or not. “So you were spying on me and you’re mad at me for what...enjoying my evening? Paul did nothing wrong or inappropriate. He was actually funny and nice. Jake is still learning and he isn’t allowed around me alone until he’s had his training. Sam and them got him out of the house in no time.”

“I’m not mad, love. I’m upset. I’m upset that you see nothing wrong with the way Paul kept his hands on you…” I held up a hand to stop him.

Paul hadn’t touched me anywhere other than my arms a few times or to kiss my cheek when they were leaving. Yes, I admit I’d been a little shocked at that but I just figured it was because we were becoming fast friends. “Paul was platonic. He’s a sarcastic asshole who likes things his way and likes to mess around with people but he’s not even interested in me that way nor am I interested in him either.” I stated firmly.

“You haven’t been inside his mind. You don't know what what he thinks about you.” He mumbled angrily.

I chuckled lightly and touched Edward’s arm. “It doesn’t matter what he thinks, Edward. His mind is his own and he didn’t voice whatever thoughts he might have about me. Have some faith that even if he had, I would have put him in his place. In fact, if he had done anything out of line I would have put him in his place. I just didn’t have to.”

He conceded with a sour look on his face. “I suppose you’re right. I’ve never done this girlfriend thing, Bella. It’s hard for me to see you around other males at all. My inner vampire wants to tear them apart and feed on them, as disgusting as that would be since they’re wolves.” At my horrified look, he continued. “I won’t do that. I would never do that. That’s why I keep my inner monster at bay.” He placated me.

It wasn’t a nice picture and it was very vivid. I recalled my dream about Edward protecting me from Maria. The way his fingers formed into claws and his angry eyes were black as night, his face twisted into a scowl. My mind changed the scenario to Edward ripping apart the wolves, my friends, with those claws and angry black eyes glaring into their bloody corpses.

“I would never do that, love. Unless they literally endangered your life, they’re safe from my wrath. They may not be safe from my jealousy though, so Paul better keep his hands to himself.” He said as he turned onto his side and wrapped his arm around my hips, laying his head on my thigh. I ran my fingers through his hair, relishing in the purr that emanated from his lips.

“You’re kind of overbearing, you know that?” I said lightly. “You’ve got nothing to worry about. I think Jake proved himself quite well today, whether it was because Sam was there or because of his own willpower. I’m not stupid enough to go see him alone while he’s adjusting, but I think it’s nice that I can still be around him. Oh, I told Charlie, I assume you know since the wolves went and saw your family?” I figured my segue was smooth but the laugh from Edward told me I’d probably not succeeded.

“Yes, they met up and were all pretty shocked at what they were proposing. I assume Sam told you the conditions of the treaty? He said he would.” He murmured as his fingers ran softly from the back of my knee to the crease between my thighs. He wasn’t trying to start anything, just touching my skin lovingly, but it definitely turned me on.

I cleared my throat. “Um. Yeah. He told me. And Charlie’s good too.” I shifted and felt Edward smirk against my leg.

“I’m glad about that, love. When do you want to be turned?” He asked as his fingers played with the hem of my panties inside my shorts. I shifted again and pushed his hand away. I wouldn’t be held accountable when I ended up fucking this man on my bed after all his enticing touches. “Oh really.” He growled at my thoughts.

I pushed him away again as he tried to get closer, a wide smile on my face. He tickled my inner thigh with soft dancing fingers and I had to clamp a hand over my mouth to stop from shrieking. He covered my body with his and pressed into me, pushing my body into the mattress below. His eyes were dark and ecstatic.

“Soon.” I whispered, answering his question. I wrapped my hands around his neck and played with the hair at the back of his neck. The silky smooth strands carded between my fingers like feathers and I pulled him down to me, bringing our lips together in a slow, passionate dance.

I did want to be changed soon. Charlie had given me his blessing and so had the wolf pack. I had nothing else to worry about except my goodbyes to everyone that I wouldn’t see for at least six months. Maybe I could wait until after my birthday. I could go to the Homecoming dance and celebrate turning eighteen officially before I died in the human world. Charlie liked to say I was eighteen already but I didn’t mind, knowing it was less than a couple of weeks off.

My decision made, I put all my effort into kissing the God above me. His moan told me he enjoyed this as much as I did.

“Mmhmm…” He hummed against my lips.

The last week and a half had been spent preparing for my ‘death’. Charlie pulled me from school and rumors flew about my imminent demise and the Cullens sudden departure, thanks to the gossip from the school's secretary.

Word around the small dreary town was that Carlisle got a job offer back east where Jasper and Emmett were - supposedly - attending college and it was just too good to pass up for another year when Edward, Rosalie, and Alice graduated so they packed their crap and rolled out of town.

Of course, no one really went anywhere but the townsfolk didn’t know that. Everyone was surprisingly more worried about me. The kids in school had no idea what to think after finding out through some eavesdropper at the Teacher’s Lounge that Isabella Swan had only weeks to live. The rumors spread like wildfire about what twisted disease I had and how I’d contracted it. The closest someone got to guessing what I was dying from was HIV. The difference there was instead of my body’s immune system failing on me it would be my brain.

No one corrected anyone.

Charlie took a much needed vacation from work to spend as much time with me as possible and we were down to La Push a lot. The pack and their mates welcomed me with open arms every time, making me feel loved and wanted. It was easier to accept than I’d initially thought and eased into their lives with grace.

The Cullens were, in fact, busy packing up what they were taking with us into the great wilderness. A family of vampires who lived in Alaska and called themselves cousins to the Cullens offered us a place to stay while I transitioned but Edward shut that down quickly. He awkwardly explained how one of the original succubus women in the family had been ‘after him’ for years. He didn’t want there to be any tension or strain between families, knowing how insecure I was about my plain Jane looks already so Jasper and Peter got on the computer and acquired an enormous mansion type home to accommodate everyone. The pictures online, I was sure, wouldn’t do it justice.

Edward climbed through my window every night and though Charlie was asleep every time, with how intuitive he’s proven to be, I’m sure he wasn’t oblivious to my late night rendezvous. We never did anything other than some light petting and sensual kisses, I just couldn’t do that in my father’s house, so maybe that was why he didn’t bother to call us out on our behavior.

I was getting anxious for the Homecoming dance. Alice and Rosalie had chosen a dress with me the first Sunday I went shopping with them and I couldn’t wait to see the look on Edward’s face when he watched me descend the staircase. Alice and Rosalie also went all out for my birthday. I was really excited for presents. It would be my very first party in over eight years!

The party itself would be in the forest by the Calawah River and not only was my father and Billy coming, but so was the entire wolfpack and their mates. I was as giddy as a little girl on Christmas morning. Esme and Alice told me that everything they bought for me would be to help me through my newborn months but I refused to find out what everyone else got for me. I loved surprises. Edward’s eyes would sparkle every time the presents or party was spoken about, making me wonder what he got me but I held my tongue.

A hot, beefy arm draped over my shoulder and the cushions of the worn plaid couch bounced as Paul sat down beside me. He kissed my temple and I twisted my face, leaning away dramatically. He smirked at me. He had been close by during Edward’s jealousy rant about him so he pushed the limits. Thankfully, Paul respected me enough not to push my limits, but he definitely pushed Edward’s,

Leah stood in front of us with her hands on her hips as she glared at Paul. “Up, Lahote. Quit fucking with her.” She growled.

Leah had become my biggest protector, aside from Jacob. She sympathised with me, having to live with her own debilitation, though her’s wasn’t life threatening. Just because her issues were different, didn’t make them any less important. Leah suffered with the knowledge that she was sterile. She was not going to ever be able to have children with her mate.

The pain that seared through her at that confirmation had her lying her head on my lap in my bedroom one night as she bawled her eyes out, clinging to my hips in desperation. I’d stroked her silky black hair and murmured my support and understanding to her. Bleary eyed, she’d looked up and asked how I could understand. She hadn’t been accusatory just curious and worried. I told her that the surgeries I’d had to save my life from Dominic’s wounds had rendered me sterile. I lost my ability to mother children at the tender age of fifteen due to the scarring inside me.

We cried together over both of our losses and pains.

Edward had shown up and when his golden eyes landed on the she-wolf, he’d smiled apologetically and left. I’d been happy that he’d given us the space to work through it.

“Fuck off, Lee.” Paul snorted as he tugged me into his side. I smiled at the two of them. “I’m not fucking with her, I’m fucking with the leech.” He smirked again and I let out a small laugh. It was true. Edward would see this in my mind and for the third time this last week, Edward would rush to the treaty line in a blind rage with Jasper and Emmett on his heels so that he and Paul could grapple.

Jasper said they liked the challenge. Mind reader versus the best fighter in the pack. I wasn’t allowed to find out first hand though, which had me none too happy.

“Yeah, well cut the shit. They won’t be around much longer and I’m tired of you hogging her just to get under his skin.” Leah wouldn’t call Edward ‘the leech’ for my benefit but she never spoke his name aloud either. I knew her stance, the same as everyone else’s on the reservation.

No one liked the vampire coven that resided so closely to their small sanctuary. It attracted nomads and caused the wolf gene to awaken in their blood, forcing the teens of the tribe to lose their education and sometimes their jobs so they could protect their people.

They loved me and wanted me to be alive, one way or another - like Jake had said before - so they tolerated the vampires.

Jake came sauntering into the room with his new mate. She was a very pretty girl, standing only as tall I am and looking like she weighed around a buck forty. She carried herself well. She was very curvy with a large hourglass figure and I was sort of jealous that I didn’t have more meat on my bones. Her clothes fit her snugly in all the right places without being too tight. The maroon scoop neck tee hugged her large breasts but ruffled around her torso and her skin tight jeans clung to her hips and thighs but flared at the ankle. Long black hair and bright hazel eyes greeted me, her dark native skin a perfect russet match to Jake’s. They made a beautiful couple.

He had been up to Port Angeles a few days before and found her and her mother stranded on the side of the road with a dead battery. Being the helpful mechanic that he is, he stopped and his whole world changed when he locked eyes with the onyx haired girl. Leah hurriedly sat beside me before L.J. and Jake could squeeze in. I smiled welcomingly and stood, hugging them both tightly and giving Jake a kiss on the cheek. When I sat between Lee and Paul, they each grabbed my hands and started stroking my knuckles. It calmed me instantly.

Lori Jade had not had a hard time accepting the fact that I was Jake’s best friend nor had she been surprised with the Spirit Protectors. She was from the Makah Rez and had grown up on similar legends so when Jake brought her home last night and finally revealed himself, she’d texted me to get over there immediately.

There was only one problem with that.

She was a stranger and to get a text like that from someone I didn’t know, from a number I didn’t know, had my teeth on edge. Edward had driven me to the treaty line at my behest and then waited for Jake to arrive in wolf form. Edward set me on Jake’s back and told me to hang on tight. I whispered my fears to Jake, concerned, though I knew rationally that everything was going to be alright.

I also wasn’t fool enough to think that I was cured just because I was constantly surrounded by friends and family who loved me unconditionally.

Jake’s large barrel body had started to purr to comfort me and I laid on my belly, holding on tightly to his thick wiry fur as he ran us through the woods. When we got to the small red house where the Black family resided, L.J. had been waiting on the porch. She rushed down, her long black hair waving and bouncing behind her as she threw her arms around her mate’s thick neck before he could phase back to human. I stood awkwardly and started retreating quickly when she started coming to hug me. My eyes were wide and panicked, my hands were held palm out toward her as I backed up.

Jake quickly phased and lightly demanded L.J. stop moving. I was surprised at his tone with her, but he's always been protective of me. She looked confused a moment, the excitement dimming from her hazel eyes until she really looked at me. My whole body was trembling and I was struggling not to cry. I felt like a real idiot for my reactions but some things I just couldn’t change. Jake stepped to her and placed a hand on her shoulder, whispering in her ear. Her eyes darted between him and me for a moment before she nodded and stood still, watching as Jake came to me. He wrapped me in his arms tightly and I pressed my nose to his bare chest, breathing him in deeply as I started sobbing.

“I’m...I can’t.” I stuttered in a quiet whisper through my tears while Jake’s large hand smoothed down my back and pulled me closer to him. My nose was flat against his body and his arms held me so tight I thought I might crack but once the trembling eased, I realized what he was doing. I’d seen the episode of Grey’s Anatomy where Dr. Bailey and Dr. Yang hug the bejesus out of Dr. Dixon while she explains how it decreases the heart rate, metabolic functions and muscle tone. All my hugs from Jake were comfort hugs.

“It’s okay, honey. You don’t have to explain anything to anyone.” He soothed me quietly. I heard the strangled noise that came from L.J.’s mouth and when she shuffled on her feet. “Stay there, L.J. I’ll be with you in a minute. Bells needs me right now.” He said, still speaking softly but more firm as he addressed her.

Jake scooped me up into his arms and turned to walk us up the ramp into the house. L.J. followed behind quietly. When I was situated on the couch on Jake’s lap, Billy rolled in with a hot mug of Earl Grey and I had to smile as I sniffed it, remembering that Edward basically called me a tea bag when he described my scent. Just thinking of my own mate had me calming down even more and I slid off of Jake’s lap, looking contrite at his new mate. The young woman sat down on the tattered recliner across from the couch and looked at both Jake and I expectantly.

I supposed that would look a little intimate to someone. I was setting a bad example and felt she deserved some explanation, though Jake could take care of the worst of it, should he feel it's necessary, another time.

Jake thankfully spoke up and started talking and I gave my input with my hands. We let her know that I'd had a very hard time and though I was getting better, I still had trouble with strangers. He looked at me sideways with his lips in a firm line as he watched my hands. I knew he didn’t want me reverting but I couldn’t force my words to work. L.J. had been amazingly supportive and though she didn’t know my past or why I was mute, she accepted me as Jake’s best friend and promised to let me come to her. That had immediately eased me and I flashed her a bright smile and signed my thanks, which Jake translated for me.

“Bells, Jesus get your head outta the clouds, will ya?” Jake demanded with a smile as he sat on the coffee table in front of me. He placed a hand on my knee and rubbed the sides of my kneecap affectionately.

Shaking myself from my thoughts, I smiled at them. We were having a barbeque at Jake’s house. The last hurrah before my birthday party. Tomorrow is the Homecoming dance - tonight being the Homecoming football game but I hate sports so no thanks - and then Sunday is my actual birthday slash birthday party. I can’t wait.

Even though L.J. was there, I didn’t want my friends having to pretend about anything so even though I was signing and not speaking because she was there along with a few other people I didn’t know, the pack didn’t pretend that this was a normal day. They treated it like I wasn’t going to be around in two days time., which earned more questioning looks from L.J. Jake would pat her shoulder or kiss her and at one point, I heard him say he would tell her later. Sunday night, after my party, Peter and Edward were taking me to the new mansion in Maine.

I found humor that I lived in Forks in Washington state and would be moving to The Forks in Maine. The state is ninety percent woodlands - privately owned sure - but who was going to stop vampires from hunting their creatures? The Forks was north enough to Canada that we would be able to disperse our hunting without draining an entire area of species.

The thought of draining animals of their blood for my own sustenance sent a shiver down my spine as it always did, but I knew it was this or permanent death.

As the evening went on, the pack boys made jokes about my soon to be undead status while the mates looked on affectionately. We pigged out on all of the traditional BBQ foods and snacks, and Charlie even let me have a shot of moonshine and a couple of beers. When I displayed my shock, he shrugged.

“Might as well get drunk once in your life, sweetheart.” He said gruffly as he took a swig of his own beer.

I was feeling no pain, having never drank before but I still held my tongue that Carlisle drank beer with him. I knew the vampires could drink alcohol. I didn't understand it, but I knew it. Everyone was getting ready to leave with full bellies and happy minds. Jake and L.J. came over and spent some time with me until Embry stole my attention and carried me like a spider monkey over to Sam and Leah. Paul picked me up from Embry and set me on his wide shoulders. My mouth tired from all the goofy smiling I did. Jared pecked my cheek and then slid me off of Paul’s shoulders, where Leah snatched me from Jared and stuck me behind her back, growling at the boys.

“Cut the shit, God!” She said exasperatedly. Turning to face me, she looked into my face hard for a moment. I wasn’t sure what had her so angry. “You okay, Bella?” I nodded with wide eyes but apparently it was funny because the pack laughed. I smiled widely before my stomach turned violently. “There she goes!” Leah claimed loudly before scooping me up and carrying me off somewhere.

The pack’s raucous laughter followed us and I looked questioningly at them as Leah carried me away. They were too blurry to focus on though.

Just as Leah set me on the tile floor of the bathroom and opened the toilet lid, I let my stomach heave. Bleck. What the heck was I getting sick for?

Smoothing my hair over my forehead with a cool washcloth, Leah called for Charlie. “Good job getting her trashed, Chief. Think it’s time to take her home?” She berated my father. I would’ve laughed at his sputtering but I ended up throwing up again.

“Shit.” He hissed. “I can’t drive. I was gonna stay here tonight. Too much of Old Quil’s ‘shine.”

I groaned and reached up blindly to flush the mess away and Leah handed me the washcloth so I could wipe my mouth. I blew the chunks from my nose and hocked a loogie so I could get the extra taste out of my mouth then stood on weak, wobbly legs. Leah uncapped the listerine and Charlie shuffled awkwardly in the doorway.

“I’m sorry, Bells.” He muttered with slurred words. He really had had too much to drink. I nodded since my mouth was full of the stinging minty liquid.

“I’ll get her home, Chief. Don’t worry bout a thing. You just go relax.” Leah assured him as she put her long toned arm around my waist and walked me slowly out to the kitchen. The pack was there looking a little more concerned now and I smiled weakly at them. I was feeling much better.

Jake shoved a saltine cracker between my lips and Paul had a small glass of seltzer water waiting for me to sip on with a straw. Jesus, I felt like an old lady. Why did people bother getting drunk if this was the final result? My body was shaking and my head was spinning between a buzzed, tipsy state and reality.

“Thank God I’ll never have to go through that again.” I muttered bitterly as I sipped from the glass Paul held. I forgot I wasn’t speaking in front of L.J. and my eyes widened a moment.

Huh...I was just fine. Go figure.

Embry chuckled before heading out the door with Jared and Sam following. Sam blew a kiss to Leah which she caught and stuck in her pocket like the lovesick dork she was. His eyes twinkled when he saw me roll my eyes.

“I’ll be back after I get her safe in her man’s arms.” She told him.

Jake gave me another one of his hormone inducing hugs, making me feel safe and comforted. His mate hung back but I was just this side of buzzed enough not to have any worries so I wobbled over to her and gave her a big hug and a sloppy kiss on the cheek. She giggled and wiped my saliva off of her face after she hugged me back.

“Make him happy. He deserves the best.” I told her seriously. I could hear the slur to my words but I just couldn’t find it in me to care. I looked over at my best friend who had tears in his eyes. “I won’t be able to kick your ass if you fuck up cuz I’ll be one of the enemy and the pack will have to rip me apart. So you take care of him or I’ll recruit Leah okay?” I told her as seriously as I could.

“Okay, little miss mobster. You don’t need to recruit anyone. L.J. and I can manage on our own without your little kittenish threats, thank you very much.” Jake scolded lightly as he pulled me from his mate. I’d been gripping her shoulders and scowling into her face. Her eyes were wide as she stared back. I grinned at her.

“I’m only kidding!” I reassured her. “Sort of. He does deserve the best. And I would kick your ass. Okay. So I wasn’t kidding.” I told her.

“Bells, please!” Jake groaned as he ran a hand down his face. I patted his bicep.

“It’s okay, buddy. I got your back! I know you’d do the same for me.” I told him meaningfully.

His eyes widened as he took in my words. Yeah, bucko. I know all about it.

“I...crap. I didn’t think he would tell you about that.” He stuttered as I scowled him.

Turning back to L.J. I smiled comfortingly. “I promise you’ve got nothing to worry about from me. I know you two will be just fine and if you’re not, that’s your business. I was just riling this guy up…” I jerked my thumb in the dope’s direction. “because he thought giving Edward that warning would go over well with me. Figured he needed a little lesson.”

L.J. played with the ends of her hair as she smiled shyly at me. “I’m glad you’re looking out for him the way he’s looking out for you...Even if it was a joke, I know it’s true on both ends.” She spoke softly.

The both hugged me tightly again and then I finally let Leah lead me out the door and into her small Nissan Sentra.

Back at the house, Leah helped me up the stairs and used my phone to message Edward. She hung around, making toast, getting a glass of water with two Advil, and waiting for me to get ready for bed. Once I was dressed for bed, she said her goodbyes and that I’d see her Sunday.

I tried to wait up for Edward but I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

The next morning, I woke early with my head lying on Edward’s firm chest, my hair fanned over his naked torso. I loved how comfortable he was with me. His chiseled features and defined body could very well be the death of me. My hormone-riddled body stretched languorously against him as I woke with a small moan. His hand, which was splayed across my hip, tightened and a purr resounded, echoing around the bedroom.

He leaned down to kiss me and as I wet my lips to receive the kiss, I stared at him in horror, making him pause. My breath had to be rank. My mouth was dry and sticky. I jumped from the bed and ran to the bathroom to brush my teeth thoroughly. Oh that was so embarrassing. I ended up going through my routine, including a coffee before heading back into my room where Edward waited with an amused smile on his face.

“Not hungover then, I see?” He asked. I looked at him quizzically.

“No, I guess not. Weird.” I wasn’t sure how I escaped that.

“It’s because the wolves took good care of you, love. Leah told me what happened and I am grateful she was there to look after you. It seems you had quite bit of fun.” He didn’t sound jealous or concerned, he sounded genuinely happy for me. He stood from the bed and came to where I was standing at the foot of the bed, never taking his eyes off of me. He grabbed the coffee mug from my hands and set it on the desk behind me before wrapping me in his arms. “I am happy for you. After this weekend, you’ll be mine and mine alone, forever. I won’t ruin this for you by being petty.” I lost myself in his crooked smile before his lips landed on mine.

My back arched and my chest pressed into his, large hands pressing into my back to hold me firmly to his body. I moaned as his cool smooth tongue glided across my bottom lip, opening up to him. My hands went from his shoulders to his hair, gripping his silky locks and slanting my face under his, deepening the kiss. The pulsing throb on my belly let me know that he was just as excited as I was.

"Let me take you to my house, Bella. Please." He whispered into my ear. His hands tangled in my hair and he pulled my face up to his, dark swirling amber stared pleadingly at me.

How could I refuse that beautiful face?


	10. Bittersweet

Charlie had left for a short fishing excursion with Billy before I'd even woken up so I left a short note for him, letting him know that I'd be back in time to get ready for the dance and that I loved him. Edward wasted no time in getting me to his house, he didn't even wait for me to put anything fantastic on. I wore a simple pair of jeans and a long sleeved henley shirt in a soft purple color. My hair, at Edward's urging, remained long and loose. I didn't see anyone as he walked me up the staircase and into his bedroom. The house was extremely quiet.

"Where is everyone?" I asked him as he sat with me on the edge of the bed. My stomach was in knots. Would he want to go all the way? I longed for that connection with him but I wasn't sure I was absolutely ready for that step. Old fears, ones I'd tried for years to push away, came rushing to me and I wrapped my arms around my chest, hugging my ribs.

Edward lovingly peeled my fingers from my sides and held my hand in his. "We have the house to ourselves love, but that doesn't mean anything has to happen." His eyes shone with his sincerity and it made my soul swell with love.

"I'm only nervous. I love the way you touch me, the way you make me feel and I know you won't ever hurt me. I can feel it as sure as I can feel you, right now." I said earnestly as I squeezed his hands.

"You know, Bella. I am a very old fashioned man, coming from a time where women and men didn't do much before marriage. If you would prefer, we can wait until our wedding night. It will give you plenty of time to prepare your mind, plenty of time for me to ease your fears." That made me pause. Why would he offer that? Was he having second thoughts? At my slightly confused and hurt look, he continued. "Don't think I'll be able to keep my hands off of you completely. I can't stand not touching you, making you feel good and hearing you moan my name. I love the sound of your voice, love." He nuzzled my nose with his and kissed the tip of it before withdrawing again. "I'll tell you for eternity if I have to. This is all set at your pace."

He was right. In a way, waiting until our wedding night would be amazing. It would give me time to prepare but also between the petting and love that Edward gives me, I'll be wound tighter than a top and not feel any fear. That was my hope, anyway.

"I think that's a great idea." I told him as my hands released his and I started to massage my way up his forearms to his chest and shoulders. He had slipped his tee back on before we left my house and I slid my fingers under the hem of his collar. "Take this off?" We might be waiting for the actual sexual act itself, but I wanted to feel him on my fingertips, now.

All of him.

At my thoughts, Edward wrapped his large hands around my waist and lifted me up, easily depositing me on the center of the bed. I pulled my shirt over my head, leaving me in a tight blue tank top and tossed it to the floor, enjoying the way his eyes lit up with excitement and darkened with arousal. I loved watching the different colors his eyes could change. He gently pushed me back and moved between my legs, propping himself on his knees and elbows above me. Lovingly nuzzling my nose and jaw, he planted kisses along the colomn of my throat and collarbone. I sighed happily as my hands wandered his back and hips, stretching my neck back so he had more room to work his magic. His tongue joined his lips while the fingers of one hand wandered around my body, caressing my skin.

He hadn't seen my stomach yet and I was too leery to let him. I'd been assured that I would be flawless once I was turned so I was hoping to wait until then.

My hopes were for naught.

"Please, let me see all of you. You're perfect and these scars," He said softly as his fingers caressed my sides over the cotton material. "are not a flaw. They speak of your perseverance and your tenacity to never give up. They speak of your strength." His words stayed soft the entire time, coaxing me slowly.

"They're disgusting." I whimpered, clutching onto his hips with my nerves.

Edward shook his head, kissing my nose then running his hand up and down my side, letting his thumb tickle the side of my breast. "There's not one thing about you that's disgusting, my love. Not one." He started purring and I felt my body relax.

How did he know exactly what to say and what to do? I supposed being a mind reader helped in a lot of situations. He smiled at me through his purr and I nodded my head when his fingers played at the hem of my tank top again. My stomach tightened in fear, preparing for the worst because no matter what he said, his eyes would be seeing the worst part of me. He kept his eyes on mine the whole while he leaned up onto his knees and used both hands to lift my tank top. I sat up slightly so he could remove the cloth and he discarded it with my henley on the floor. I could feel the thick beat of my heart, pounding inside my chest and my fingers dug into the black and silver silk of the comforter on the bed.

Edward's hands touched me while he kept his eyes on mine, as if to reassure me. It didn't work much. His fingers danced and seduced the skin of my rippled and scarred stomach, feeling the thick lines where the surgeons sewed me up. They tickled my sides as he followed each scar that proturded from my belly button to either side of my body and then he followed the line back to my belly button, dipping lower to feel the deep knotted holes of scar tissue below my navel. A tear slipped from my face as his own features never crinkled in disgust but actually lightened with awe.

"You're showing me your deepest fears, love. May I look?" He asked every so lovingly.

I glanced down, watching his nimble fingers caress and massage my ragged tissue. He pressed and tickled and rubbed feather lightly over the scars and jagged tissue that had been with me for three long years. Taking a deep breath, my breasts rising and pushing against the white fabric of my bra, I released it with puffed cheeks before raising my eyes to his again.

"Yes." I squeaked then cleared my throat, blushing at the strangled sound. "Yes, Edward you can. I trust you." And I did. It was so scary and so hard to let anyone see this part of me, so intimately and so willingly but I trust him with everything I have inside me.

He nodded slightly at my words and most likely my thoughts, as his reverent lips pulled up in that crooked smile I love so much. His eyes drifted down slowly, over my breasts, his fingers following the trail that his eyes burned into my skin. The cool touch of his skin leaving me yearning for more, distracting me from what was going to happen next. I watched as he looked at my stomach for the first time. His eyes darted to mine, checking on me and I gave a tiny grimace that should have been a smile, then he looked back down at my stomach. The wrinkles and divots, knots and ripples disgusted me but he looked at them and traced them all as if it were the most magical road map he'd ever seen. A road map of the misery I'd had to endure.

His touch seemed to ebb the pain from my body, however. His fingers still soothingly smoothing over my skin so lightly, his eyes checking on me every few moments before he looked at my body. Before long, I was feeling more confident. He didn't shy away in disgust, he didn't look at me as if I were cancer. I loved him so much more in that moment and I had to show him. Leaning up, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. His lips met mine in a fervent dance and his hands wound around my body, pulling me closer to him, lifting my hips so that I sat on his thighs, straddling him in the center of the bed.

I pressed my core to his throbbing erection, only slightly surprised now that it was still there. That my body hadn't turned him off. He made a disgruntled noise in the back of his throat and tore his lips from mine with a scowl. I pressed my lips to his again with a grin.

"I get it. I'll stop." I murmured to his lips.

"Good." He whispered before laying me back down. He slipped his fingers into the top of my jeans and I lifted my hips so he could pull them down. He tossed them aside as my fingers fumbled with the button on his jeans, leaving me in a pair of white panties to match my bra. He lept from the bed and was back in a split second, dressed only in a pair of fitted boxers, his erection tenting them.

I reached down inside his boxers as he hovered over me and wrapped my tiny hand around his cock, squeezing just under the head once before I started to manipulate the velvety soft skin. The moan that escaped his lips had my pussy throbbing with want. He shut his eyes and lifted his face toward the ceiling as I continued caressing him, small grunts leaving his lips. He brought his mouth to the nipple on my breast through the material of my bra and pulled it into his mouth, flicking his tongue over it until it formed a tight bead and the noise it pulled from my throat had him smiling. I squeezed him harder and he bucked into me. I let go of him and used my hands to guide him closer, lifting my hips to connect our centers through the material. He looked at me intently.

"Are you sure?" He asked, even as his hips continued their light undulating against me. We had fooled around, touched each other, but our most intimate parts had not once come into contact, even clothed as we were in our underthings. I threw my head back deeper into the pillows and moaned.

"Yes, Edward." I breathed. "I want to feel you there when we come together." My breath came in short pants and I clung to him wherever I could reach.

He leaned close, pressing his chest to mine causing my nipples to tighten and peak painfully. Every undulation against each other as I writhed beneath him had my nipples scraping across his pecs, sending electric pulses to my clit. The way his long shaft pressed and pushed against me had those pulses throbbing and I moaned again before finding his lips. Our tongues tangled sensually as he continued bucking into me, causing the build of my orgasm closer to it's peak.

I bucked harder into him as my eyes hooded but I wanted to see his handsome face when he finally climaxed with me. I felt the fluttering of my inner walls as they pulsed and pressed together, my clit throbbing hard against the shaft of Edward's cock.

"Oh God, yes." I breathed, my body getting closer and closer. Edward tucked his face into my neck and started to taste me with his tongue, the cool wetness adding another brilliant sensation to my already filleted nerves. It felt like heaven and then he groaned, long and loud. The sound of his climax, the deep cool breaths he breathed into my neck, the undulation of his bucking hips, sent me over the proverbial edge and I keened as hot juices flowed from my core and soaking my panties. The delightful throb continued as Edward kept up his ministrations against my core. My hands shook as I let my fingers dance over his skin, pushing his hair back from his face, and kissing his lips.

"Love...love..." He whispered as his arms came around me, pulling me impossibly tighter, pressing kisses to my face and neck. I gripped him tightly as well, relishing in the feel of him against me.

Soon it was time to return to reality again and Edward helped me dress so he could take me back home. I needed to get ready for the dance tonight.

"I'll pick you up in a little while, Bella." Edward said as he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. We were standing in my bedroom now. Charlie is downstairs, scaling and cleaning his catch to freeze it in the deep freeze that's in the shed behind the house.

I leaned into his palm as he cupped my face. "I love you." I whispered as my eyes closed.

He kissed my forehead, one hand on my waist pulling me to him. "I love you too. Always."

I leaned up on my tip toes and gave him my lips, pressing them to his softly at first until we became frenzied again. It didn't take much.

“Ahem.” I heard before tearing my lips from Edward’s and spinning to face a grinning Alice and Rosalie. They both tossed me a fingerwave before shooing the male from the room. I tried to protest but they didn’t want to hear anything of it.

I pouted very seriously.

“We’ve got a lot to do, Bella. In a couple days you’ll be changing into a vampire and we need to know how you want things to look when you wake up so this is a makeover for that and for the Homecoming dance tonight! You’re ours for the rest of the day.” Alice chirped happily as she started gathering a few things from my room to bring into the bathroom. Rosalie stood in the bathroom with a large antique chair with a round back and thick cushion for me to sit in. The wood frame was a deep mahogany and though freshly stained, I could see the natural wear it had.

“How the hell did that get in here?” I asked in shock.

“I brought it, of course. It’s the perfect height for you to sit and let us work without things getting in the way. Plus, it’s the perfect amount of elegance for your pampering today.” I nodded my head at Rosalie’s explanation as if it made sense to me. In reality, I wasn’t sure why my own old kitchen chairs wouldn’t do the trick but I shrugged and let it go.

I sat down as directed and let the girls pluck and wax my face. My eyebrows were gently sculpted, not too thin. I ended up laying on a massage table so they could wax other parts of my body. They waxed my legs and though it stung, I didn’t let it show, lying there stiff as a board while they ripped the hair from the follicles viciously. When Alice started pulling my panties aside, I almost had a cow.

Shooting upright, my eyes about popped out of my head as I yelled. “What the hell are you doing?”

Alice jumped back, clearly not anticipating that reaction while Rosalie soothed me. My heart was jumping in my chest.

“A little warning, Alice. I thought we talked about this.” Rosalie scolded as she pet my arm like a cat.

Eyes wide with fear, Alice looked from me to the floor. “I’m sorry. She was being so still and not showing any pain, like she couldn’t feel anything. I figured I could get it over with real quick and be done with it.”

“Get what done?” I asked before reality set in and my own fear subsided. “Shit. My brazilian. Sorry, Alice. I know we talked about it minutes ago but hell. I was concentrating on not letting out a peep while you massacred my legs. Ok.” I took a deep, soothing breath and laid back down. “Go for it.” I said as I clenched my teeth and braced myself, my fingers gripping the sides of the black table so hard they almost went numb.

I felt as Alice spread the hot wax over my pubic bone and down over my lower lips, even dipping between my buttcheeks as we spoke about. A Full Monty. I didn’t want any hair down there for eternity. Alice tried to talk me into leaving something for Edward since that was the era he was raised in and would most likely find it sexier, but I refused. This was the twenty-first century. I was doing this for me and I hated hair down there.

Once I spread some cooling gel over my newly waxed parts, refusing to let Alice the Malice near my poor tender spots, I wrapped a warm towel around my naked body and sat like a good girl for the two vampires who worked on my hair and makeup for another two hours. With a break for a late lunch for me, they set to work on manicuring my fingernails and then pedicuring my toes. I felt like a new woman. The bathroom was a mess of dead, old skin, hair trimmings, and discarded wax papers.

“So Edward is going to match your look.” Alice dropped nonchalantly and I gaped at her.

“Really. I did not expect that.” I said.

Rosalie helped me slip into my dress. An Elizabeth Stone ‘Rosetta’ Audrey Hepburn style dress in black with white trimming around the strapless top and running from hip to hem in strips of the ruffled skirt. The white trimming had tiny black polka dots. It looked fantastic, hugging my torso, pushing my small breasts up just a bit and flaring at my hips down to mid calf. I slipped on a pair of black and white shiny couture Bettie heels to complete the look, not worrying at all about falling when I’d be in the arms of my vampire all night.

Charlie was watching a ball game when we got downstairs and Alice was getting impatient for pictures. He let her buzz around him, fixing his hair and sticking an Indie Fifties bowling shirt on him in black with a red stripe running down the front right side of it. He looked the exact part for Rockabilly, with his thick porn ‘stache and all. I chuckled at his discomfort and stood with a bright smile beside him as Alice and Rosalie took lots of pictures.

Edward would be showing up soon, so Alice and Rosalie sped from the house, laden with all they brought. They wouldn’t be going with their mates because they were ‘back east’ but they still wanted to go and have a good time, so they had to get ready too.

“You look beautiful, Bells.” Charlie praised as he took in the way my hair was rolled and curled. No flower clips this time, just a ton of bobby pins holding the victory rolls in place. I smiled at my father and sat primly on the corner of the couch, careful not to wrinkle the seat of my dress. “No jewelry?” He questioned.

I tilted my head, absently touching my throat where no necklace lay. “Hm. Guess not. I didn’t even think of it.”

Charlie nodded, seeming uncomfortable. The doorbell rang and before I could stand, he ran to open it. Swinging it wide, my breath caught in my throat. Edward always looked good, no joke, but Edward sporting the Rockabilly look? Long legs encased in tight dark slacks, black boots on his large feet, he wore a black denim shirt that was rolled up to the elbows and a maroon button up vest over it that looked almost silk, perhaps it was rayon but I doubted it with all the money they had. The denim shirt was buttoned up to his throat and his sexy red-gold hair was in its usual casual disarray making him look sexier than I’d ever seen him.

I’m pretty sure if Charlie hadn’t been standing there, I wouldn’t have been able to stifle the aroused moan that tried to jump from my lips when he gave me his crooked smile. He stepped forward and handed me a single rose - in the same shade of his vest - that I hadn’t noticed him holding. I blushed and heard him whisper ‘beautiful’ as he tucked a large bouncing curl behind my ear as I walked up to him.

“Okay, kids. Let me get a few pictures then you can be on your way.” Charlie said as he held a large Nikon camera up. At my inquiring look he shrugged and started snapping pics. Edward even went so far as to dipping me in the entryway and placing a kiss on my throat, the flash proving that my father caught that image. “That’s a good one.” He said admiringly. I was glad he seemed to be doing well with all of this.

I hugged my dad goodbye and he kissed my temple, telling me to have fun and that I didn’t have a curfew.

We dropped jaws at the dance and I had a ton of fun showing off my dancing. I couldn’t tell anyone where I’d gotten so graceful on the dancefloor considering I had a hard enough time walking across flat surfaces, but the girls definitely looked jealous of me. I didn’t care about that. I only had eyes for my handsome boyfriend.

His eyes crinkled and his nose scrunched at that thought. I raised an eyebrow as we started walking from the gym, hand in hand. The dance was over and we were still in our own little world, heading to his car.

He didn’t answer until he helped me into the car and got into the driver’s seat. “Boyfriend. It sounds so juvenile.” He said.

I nodded. “It feels that way to me too.” I told him as I placed my hand over his on the stick shift. He smiled and flipped his hand so our fingers could link together and he drove me home.

Sunday morning dawned so sunny that even the dust motes danced happily in the air as I squirmed to get out of my bed. Throwing the covers sideways and swinging my feet to touch down on the cold wooden floorboards, I got out of bed. Edward was the perfect gentleman in front of Charlie last night when he dropped me off, leaving me with a tight hug and a chaste kiss on the cheek. I blushed at Charlie’s knowing look and avoided him as I made myself a warm cup of sugarmilk and went up to my room.

I stretched on my way to the bathroom, my fingertips touching the door jamb as I passed under it. I stopped and stared at the portrait of my mother, my heart twisting in my chest. She was so young and vibrant, a shining smile on her beautiful face as she posed for the camera.

“I love you, Mom.” I whispered as I touched the thin sheet of glass covering her face.

Continuing on to the bathroom and going through my morning routine, I was glad to be under the warm spray of the shower. Though I’d taken all the bobby pins out of my hair the night before, the hairspray and product they’d put in my hair to keep it perfect all night had crimped my skull, giving me a throbbing headache to wake up to. I scrubbed and rinsed and got out of the stall, wrapping myself up in a thick dark blue towel. I decided that I wanted to give my head a break for my last day as a human on earth and gave myself a half up faux-hawk using a thick fishtail braid. My hair was straightened and smoothed down my back and I sprayed a thin layer of spray to keep it from frizzing later in the - no doubt - wet air.

The party was going to be outside in a large cleared away area by the Calawah River behind the Cullen’s house so I knew I’d want to dress somewhat warm so I wouldn’t freeze before I was frozen forever. Choosing one of the outfits Alice insisted I buy, though honestly, it didn’t take much convincing...I slipped on a pair of tight dark blue jeans with the hems rolled up a few inches and a pair of black and white saddle shoes. I pulled a black lace camisole over my black bra and then topped the look with a turquoise and black button up cardigan with thick black wrist cuffs. The shoulders had martini glasses on them, outlined in the same turquoise as the torso and sleeves.

Skipping down the stairs after grabbing my quilted turquoise handbag, I stopped by the kitchen to give Charlie a kiss on the cheek and grab a cup of coffee. He blushed and chuckled at my happiness.

“You’re all ready for this, aren’t ya, Bells?” He asked with a smile.

“I really am, Dad. I feel completely refreshed.” I finished stirring my coffee then plopped down across from him at the linoleum table. “Seriously, we both know my life was complete shit and I’m going to miss Mom forever and ever.” Charlie interrupted with a quiet ‘amen’, something he always did when Renee was spoken about. “But since moving here with you, I’ve found not only the best father in the whole world” - to which he blushed again - “and a huge family on the rez, but now I’ve found someone who loves me….Really loves me, Dad!” Tears formed in my eyes and I was glad I hadn’t applied my makeup yet. Charlie reached across the table and grabbed my hand. “I really can’t believe how lucky I’ve become. I thought for sure I was doomed to live a terrible life.”

I sniffled and Charlie stood to round the table and he lifted me up, taking my seat and setting me on his lap. His strong plaid covered arms wrapped around me and he kissed my temple. “You’ve been through hell, sweetheart, there’s no doubt about that and sometimes I think it’s strange that you’re finding your true life with the same species who almost killed your spirit…” He paused to clear his throat, giving me an apologetic look. “But girl, you are the strongest person I know and you deserve more than anyone else I know. I’m just so glad I don’t have to let you go forever.” He hugged me tight and I wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him back.

A knock on the door interrupted the moment and I huffed, rolling my eyes. “Jeez, not even a moment's peace.” I grumbled as Charlie chuckled. I got up and let the old man get the door while I sat back down, enjoying one of the last cups of coffee I’d ever have in my life. Jake and Paul came barreling into the kitchen with a grinning Charlie sauntering in behind them. Each of them dumped three large paper bags filled to bursting with groceries and set them heavily onto the floor by the counter. I raised my eyebrows without standing from the table and canted my head to the side.

“What’s this?” I asked them.

Paul was wearing a mile wide grin and Jake came over to wrap me up in a huge bear hug. Once he set me on my feet again, he bellowed loudly, “This is your help for the day! Me and Paul here are gonna fix you up a gourmet breakfast and then we’re all gonna work on the food for the party while _you_ sit there and look pretty!”

Charlie started unpacking the groceries and putting certain things on the countertop. Pancake mix, raw sausages, two pounds of bacon, and two dozen eggs were set out while Paul and Jake started grabbing pans and bowls from the cupboard. I stood there with my mouth open until Paul turned and fingered my jaw closed.

“You’ll catch flies.” He muttered before turning and started mixing pancakes up. I sat down at the table again, just watching as the men flit around the kitchen like they knew what they were doing. I watched as the two Quileutes muscles bunched and released under their shirts - Jake’s a black and blue plaid button up, Paul’s a baggy dark denim button up - and worked quickly at the counter.

After a few minutes, Jake grabbed my coffee mug and made me a fresh cup, setting the steamy liquid in front of me with a grin. “Drink up, Bells! Last one of your life.”

I smiled as tears formed once again in my eyes. I had a feeling I was going to be doing a lot of blubbering today. “Thank you, Jake.”

Breakfast was a rowdy and fun affair, with laughs and stories about the last month and tales of the wolf pack. They even cleaned up the mess they made! Refusing to let me lift a finger to help, they set to work immediately making lasagna, potato salad, hashbrown casserole, and barbeque chuck steak. Realizing I wasn’t going to be able to enjoy the food for at least a few more hours, I went upstairs to do my makeup and pack a bag from my room to take with me when I ‘died’. I didn’t want much and I honestly didn’t need much, but I had some things I needed to take with me into my new life. Presents of jewelry and books my mom had gotten me when I was little, boxes of photo albums that Charlie had put together for me over the years, and the new clothes Alice and Rosalie had made me keep here. Most things were left at the Cullens after our shopping trip and Alice had been ordering like a maniac online so that I would be well prepared for my newborn year.

My makeup was more sedate than I usually did it, with a thin sweeping cat’s eye on my upper lid, light gray shadow with a smidge of turquoise to match my sweater, and long sweeping lashes in a deep brown mascara. I didn’t bother with any bright red lipstick or foundation. Carrying my Big Bang Theory duffel bag and my Marvel purse downstairs, I set them by the stairs and helped the boys lug the succulent scents of their work out to Paul’s truck and Charlie’s cruiser. My dad left to go pick up Billy and I sat in Paul’s truck between Jake and him as we left my dad’s little white house to go to the Cullen’s big mansion.

Edward was waiting for us on the front porch and practically shoved Jake out of the way to lift me out of the vehicle. Thankfully, only a grumble left Jake’s smiling lips. Hugging the air from my lungs, I kissed his cheek and my mate set me down on my feet, admiring my outfit a moment while his fingers entwined with mine. I smiled up at him as he kissed my nose.

“You look beautiful, love.” He murmured in my ear. My face reddened and he chuckled. He was the one who looked beautiful in his dark blue jeans and bowling shoes and long sleeved black shirt that he had rolled up to his elbows. His hair was, of course, in sexy disarray. He smirked at me and I blushed again, looking away.

Paul ambled around the front of his truck, arms laden with the tins of food and bumped my back with his elbow. “You gonna help me out, babe or just stand there gawking at the popsicle?” He asked, eyes wide with mischief. Edward growled and pulled me closer to him.

I shot Paul a look, my brows furrowed. “Don’t start, Paul. Gimme that.” I reached for the top dish but he twisted away from me with a laugh and headed towards the backyard.

“I was only messing with ya, don’t get your pretty little panties in a twist.” He shouted over Edward’s increasing growl. I hugged him tight and laid my head on his chest. I wished he wouldn’t let him get to him but I could see that Paul was going to push a lot of buttons today.

Smoothing his cool hands down my back, Edward sighed. “He will, he’s already got a list of ideas running in that filthy brain of his.”

Looking up into his amber eyes, I kissed his lips once. “Don’t let him bother you.”

He smiled thinly. “I’m trying not to.”

I raised my voice so hopefully the wolf would hear. “He wouldn’t dare ruin my birthday. I just know it.” Edward’s snicker and eye toss toward Paul, who was now out of view, had me lifting my eyebrow.

“He heard you and he’s complaining that you’re ruining his fun.” He said, his voice filled with humor.

I nodded my head with finality. I knew he wouldn’t go too far.

I could tell that the things going through the temperamental wolf’s head was bothering him today and made a mental note to make sure Paul behaved...at least in regards to me. I can’t control his thoughts but I can certainly avoid the brute. Paul was a good man with a good heart but he had a twisted sense of humor and loved to pick on Edward. Alice bounded down the front porch and headed straight for me. She was dressed in a pale purple blouse and a tan pencil skirt. How this girl could dress like that for a day in the woods, I would never know.

Clasping my hands in hers she pulled me in a ring-around-the-rosey type circle the whole while her mouth moved. “Oh Bella, I just knew this outfit would look beautiful on you. It hugs to you perfectly. Your hair is great! I wish mine was long enough to fishtail. I’ve loved that style since it became popular. Rosalie won’t let me braid her hair. Will you let me do your hair when you’re changed?”

I laughed and Edward held my shoulders to keep me from falling once Alice let go of me and spun around excitedly. “Sure, Alice. Anything you want.” I said with a smile.

Edward groaned and I looked at him curiously. Rosalie walked out looking model perfect as always with her hair in golden cascades, a tight wool sweater in light grays and a pair of light blue skinny jeans. Her charcoal heels clicked on the porch as she stepped down the stairs. “You really shouldn’t have said that.” She admonished lightly. “She’ll be doing literally anything she wants from now on.”

The greeting party moved to the backyard where we met up with Carlisle and Esme, who both kissed my cheeks after Esme gave me a big motherly hug.

“Emmett went off with the wolves to help set up the food. There’s a small generator to keep it all warm for you all and a bucket of ice with water and soda for you as well. Let’s start heading that way! We wouldn’t want to be late to your party, now would we?” She said as she grasped my hand. Edward looked on fondly as he sidled up next to us. Rosalie and Alice sped ahead, chattering all the while.

The walk wasn’t very long and I could hear music coming from a boombox before the river came into view. Jake and Paul were setting out plates and napkins on an eight food table filled with food while the rest of the wolves smiled and waved, their imprints at their sides. L.J. ran up to me and snatched me from Esme, hugging me tightly. Her light cream sweater contrasted nicely with her dark tanned skin, her onyx hair flowing loosely over her shoulders. I responded in kind, feeling more comfortable in her presence now. I guess they’re not lying when they call it liquid courage. Charlie and Billy were already seated next to a large fire pit, the flames roaring loudly and warming the area.

I turned and took in my surroundings. The decorations were sparse, with only two red balloons tied to a chair at the far end of the area and I liked it that way. It seemed like a traditional barbeque with friends and family with chairs and small tables set about, a fire, and lots of food. The generator sat behind a large thick bush behind the table, hidden from view.

“Happy birthday, Bella!” Edward whispered in my ear as he wrapped my tiny hand in his, engulfing it. I smiled widely at my love, a blush heating my cheeks.

The wolves heard his whispered words and all turned at the same time, wide smiles displayed on dark native faces. In a bass and baritone unison they all exclaimed loudly, “Happy birthday!” Emmett dove out from the thicket of trees and landed in front of the wolves on his knees with his arms splayed high over his head. “Happy birthday!” He yelled loudly.

I covered my giggle with my free hand and leaned into Edward as the imprints and female vampires came up to me, all greeting me with the same sentiment. Jake’s stomach growled loudly and I laughed.

“Time for food!” He exclaimed as he ushered his imprint forward, allowing her to eat before him. Edward followed, eager to get me a plate before the wolves devoured it all. I stood there a moment before I found a seat near Charlie. He hugged me with one arm and smiled.

“Hey Billy.” I said as I waved to him. He gave me a fatherly smile.

“Hello, Bella. How are you doing today? Are you nervous about tomorrow?” He asked before shoveling a large bite of lasagna in his mouth.

Shaking my head, I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees as I looked around the area. “No.” I said softly. “Not at all.” It was the truth too. I was happy knowing that I would be practically indestructible. No looming disease just waiting to spring up and eat my body and brain. I would live forever with my mate and new family while getting to spend the rest of my father’s life with him.

Charlie nudged Billy with his elbow and got his attention about some sport or other. I turned my head, scanning the area for the third time. _Where were they?_ I couldn’t seem to catch a glimpse of Jasper or Peter anywhere. Edward handed me a plate filled with one of everything and my eyes widened comically.

“I cannot eat all of this!” I said incredulously.

Edward grinned sheepishly. “I wasn’t sure what you’d want so I got you some of everything. I hope there’s something on there you like, at least.”

“It all looks amazing.” I said, eyeballing the food as he set the plate in my lap. I hadn't realized how hungry I was, even though I'd eaten a huge breakfast a couple hours before.

I took the plate from him eagerly and dug straight into the lasagna first before devouring the hashbrown casserole. Everything the guys made that morning was delicious and I couldn’t help the small moans of ecstasy that escaped from my throat. When I was finished, Peter and Jasper still hadn’t shown themselves. Maybe Peter had to go back home. It hurt that he wouldn’t want to say goodbye first. I missed him so much. It also sucked that he would leave the day of my birthday. It didn’t make any sense unless he came across an emergency. Still, I figured someone would tell me. I let Edward take my plate and watched as the wolves polished off every pan and Tupperware on the banquet table. Robotically taking a bottle of water from someone who handed it to me, I sipped at it while I thought about why Jasper would have gone with Peter if he had to go home.

“Cake time!” Esme exclaimed as she handed Leah a lighter to light the candles on the cake. I smiled shyly as everyone sang happy birthday to me...loudly...and off key. It was great. The wolf pack, Charlie, Billy, and myself all had a slice of really good cake. Edward sat smiling at me, occasionally wiping a smudge of frosting off my lip and pressing it to my mouth for me to lick off. I caught Paul’s eye once as my lips wrapped around Edward’s finger and he scoffed, looking away with a scowl. I didn’t think on that reaction long because Rosalie and Alice bounded up to me with big smiles on their faces.

“It’s time to open presents!” Alice squealed as Rosalie lifted my hands, pulling me up from the chair and Edward’s fingers graced the small of my back. I looked back at him and he gave me a blinding smile. No one else seemed worried about Peter or Jasper so maybe I was making a big deal of nothing in my head. I let Rosalie lead me from my chair by the fire to a single patio chair decorated with the red balloons and cushions of bright red and orange flowers. She pushed lightly on my shoulders and I sat while she waved toward Alice exaggeratedly. Alice then handed me a small gift bag.

The silver and blue gift bag was beautiful itself and I smiled widely when I lifted the white tissue paper and saw a pair of maroon and black cat eye retro sunglasses. I had a black pair of fake eye glasses but these were fantastic. The lenses were dark and glossy and the black was only thin stripes.

“Thank you, Alice!” I said as I modeled them, tossing my head back and forth while chuckles erupted around me. All the wolves and Cullens, my father and Billy had joined us as Alice handed me the bag. If only Peter would show up. Edward sat on the ground beside me, looking up at me with a loving smile, stars in his eyes.

Rosalie and Esme handed me their gifts, in matching gift bags but one had silver tissue the other had dark blue. Carlisle said his gift was better off opened later. He looked almost nervous. Nodding, I accepted a small box from Jacob with his and Billy’s signatures on it. I lifted the top and gasped when I saw what was nestled inside a black velvet bed. A carved red wolf with it’s head resting on a carved light wood swan. It was beautiful. The swan was sitting on it’s belly, it’s neck twisted to sit atop the wolf’s back as well while the wolf sat beside it. This breathtaking knick knack would have to be encased in glass to keep for the years I was going to be around. I jumped from my seat and launched myself into Jake’s arms, hugging him tight before releasing him and hugging his father just as tight. Billy’s deep rumbling laugh echoed in the small area as he patted my back.

The gifts were all sentimental like that. Things that would pertain to the certain wolf so I could remember them always. Except Quil. He gave me a set of handcuffs and told me not to break them the first time I used them. I’d turned completely red in the face and Edward scowled at him before Paul shoved his packmate over and winked at us.

I couldn’t stand it anymore though. As much as I loved having everyone here and receiving their beautiful gifts, I needed to know where Peter was. Before I could even ask, like a signal I missed was given off, I heard the loud roar of an engine in the distance. My head turned and then I was whisked up and away in Edward’s arms, heading back toward the Cullen’s house. My breath left me while the trees blurred around us for just a moment before his long fingers covered my eyes and he set me down on my feet.

“What is this? What’s going on?” I asked, my hands wrapped around my man’s wrists where he had my eyes shielded from the world.

“This is your surprise, sweet pea! Okay, let’er see already.” Peter griped with a smile and I gasped at hearing his voice while Edward’s hands fell away, softly touching my neck and shoulders on their descent. Peter was standing in front of a completely blacked out Dodge Ram pickup truck. The engine was idling and Jasper sat in the driver’s seat, revving it loudly.

My mouth dropped open in surprise when I saw Peter waving his arms in a flourish toward the beast. My lips moved but I couldn’t get any words out. Was that for me? Peter’s smile widened impossibly at my expression and he started leaning toward the truck as he waved more exaggeratedly, nodding his head up and down slowly. Edward chuckled as he gave me a light shove toward my friend.

“Woah.” I breathed. I really couldn’t get anything else out. My own vehicle? A truck, to boot! I threw my arms around Peter’s still moving body and his arms folded around me tightly as he picked me up.

“Happy Birthday, Bells. I love ya, ya know.” He murmured before setting me back down.

Tears started forming in my eyes as I looked from Peter to Jasper, who was now climbing out of the cab, to the truck and back. “Thank you.” I choked. Clearing my throat, I tried again. “Thank you so much. It’s perfect!”

Jasper said a quick happy birthday, tipping his imaginary cowboy hat, before he zipped off toward the party while Peter let me check out my new ride. Edward hung close by but he didn’t hover like he normally did. I caught his eye several times and smiled at him sweetly before Peter would grab my attention again and show me how something else worked. I wouldn’t be able to drive the truck until my newborn strength and dexterity were under control so Peter promised to let me take it for a spin this evening after the party.

We walked back to the party, animatedly talking about the weeks to come and joined the others. It was dwindling down. The wolves were getting antsy because they’d eaten all the food, my father was getting tired, as was Billy.

Walking up to the two human men, I gave them both hugs. “I’m going to miss you guys. I’m so glad I got to spend this time with you.” I said softly, holding onto my dad’s hands.

“Don’t act like I’ll never see you again, Bells. I’ll talk to you all the time. Promise me. And I’ll see you in a few months or so, okay?” He was more demanding than he was questioning and the tears in his eyes threatened to break my heart. I knew we would see each other often and that we could talk and I would be able to visit him once I was in control, but it still hurt me to have to leave him at all.

I pressed my nose to his chest, inhaling his Brute aftershave scent deeply as I wrapped my arms around his ribs. He hugged me tightly around my shoulders and kissed the top of my head. We stood that way for several minutes, Billy ended up grabbing my hand from behind my father and placing a warm kiss on the back of it. I squeezed his fingers as well but didn’t lift my face from my dad’s chest. When I finally pulled away, it was bittersweet watching Charlie wheel Billy away.

All of this was bittersweet.

The wolves all gave me strong bear hugs and their imprints hugged me as well. Sam placed his big hand on my shoulder, much like the first time he spoke to me. “You take care of yourself, Bella. Remember, you’re welcome here any time.” He winked and squeezed my shoulder once before letting go and grabbing Leah’s hand in his. She kissed my cheek and wished me good luck.

Quil and Embry bounded up for their hugs while Quil chattered about going on a hunt with me before we left Forks. I looked to Edward who didn’t seem to think it was a good idea until Rosalie came forward and draped her arm over my shoulders. “We’d love to. It’ll be fun to see who can get the first elk of the season.” She said haughtily to the two boys. They laughed joyfully as they left, shoving each other playfully.

Jake ambled up next and wrapped me in his arms, spinning me around making me laugh. He hugged me tight. “Get control soon, Bells. We gotta hang out again.”

I smiled and kissed his cheek. “Definitely. I’ll miss you, Jake. Take care of Billy for me okay?” He nodded and hugged me again before lumbering into the trees, following the rest of his pack, minus one.

All of the Cullens had headed back to the mansion with Peter, all of them taking the gifts I’d been given. The table and food had already been taken care of. Thank God for vampire speed. The only ones left by the river were Edward, Paul, and me.

Paul came up to me with tears in his eyes and I looked at Edward who scrunched his face up in pain. Their eyes met and I watched as understanding passed over my mate’s face before he quietly excused himself. My eyes followed Edward until Paul’s large warm hands wrapped around mine. He pulled me forward and laid my head on his chest, one hand smoothing down my back, pressing me into him. Paul had never displayed this vulnerability around me before and I leaned back a little to look up at his sad face. His full lips were pulled down into a frown and his eyes were swimming with tears. I put my small hand on his face and smoothed my fingers over his cheek.

“Paul. Paul, what’s the matter?” I asked, my own throat closing with the lump that was rising in it from the pain in his eyes.

I watched as his lip quivered before he bit down on it and inhaled sharply. Shaking his head, some of his dark hair falling into his eyes, he said gruffly, “I’m just gonna miss you, girl.” His arms tightened their hold around me and I laid my head back on his chest, letting him gain the comfort he seemed to need.

My eyes met Edward’s as he stood off to the side, his eyes staring into mine intently. I smiled weakly at him and squeezed Paul one more time before pulling from the embrace. A pained sound escaped his lips and I looked up at him with wide eyes. The temperamental wolf had let the tears slip from his eyes and they tracked down his cheeks, his breath hitching.

“Hey.” I soothed quietly. “I’ll only be gone a little while. You’ve become such a good friend to me, Paul. Everything will be okay.” I wasn’t sure what had his heart twisting the way it was but it cut me to see him in so much agony. In the few short weeks I’d known Paul it seemed as if our connection to each other ran deep. This was so hard for him for some reason and it made it hard for me too. “It’ll be okay.” I whispered.

He squeezed me to him again roughly as he buried his face in my neck, his body bent low to accommodate our height difference, and I clung to his shirt. I felt his tears on my neck and felt him inhale deeply. When he lifted his face finally and stepped back, he let his hand keep hold of mine for a moment more. Edward shifted on his feet and Paul dropped my hand. He looked over at my mate and nodded once. Edward waved, a sorrowful look on his face and nodded as well. Paul dropped a quick hot kiss on my forehead and bounded away quickly.

I stood there, staring after him for long minutes, wondering what in the hell that was all about. I didn’t understand any of it and my heart actually hurt to watch him walk away. Edward glided up to me and wrapped his arm around my waist. I continued staring into the forest while he placed soft kisses in my hair, his fingers rubbing soothing circles on my hip. After a while, his grip tightened on my waist and I turned to look up at him.

“Are you ready for your last present of the evening?” He asked quietly. Twilight had descended and the sky was clear, making it a beautiful ending to my birthday party. There was a soft pain in his eyes and I wished there was a way to erase it. I hated seeing him in pain and wondered again what happened between him and Paul. Shoving those thoughts aside for now, I pushed up on my tip toes and pressed my lips to his, wrapping my arms around his neck and digging my fingers into his silky red-gold hair.

Our lips caressed and moved together, sending electric currents through my body. His hands palmed my waist and held me close as he slanted his head and deepened the kiss, pushing his cool tongue into my warm mouth. I moaned around him and his breath hitched. Pressing me closer to him, I felt how he was reacting to the kiss and smiled against his lips.

Gasping for breath, I finally answered him with dancing eyes and a wide smile. “Yes, I am.”

He entwined my fingers and we walked sedately through the woods on the worn path back to the Cullen’s house. The sky was clear of clouds, a strange occurrence in Forks, and the only thing lighting the backyard was a string of christmas lights, strewn decoratively in and around the gazebo. Crystal vases filled with Calla Lilies and white Orchids were spaced evenly all around the railing and flower petals lined the two stairs leading up into the small wooden area. My hand to my lips, my eyes wide as could be, I saw two cream pillows with thick silver lining sitting in the center on the floor. Edward walked me into the gazebo and motioned for me to sit on one of the pillows. Once sat, he took his place across from me with a shining smile on his face.

“It’s so beautiful, Edward.” I said in awe.

He smiled shyly and looked down at his fidgeting hands before glancing at me from under his thick lashes. “I have something I want to ask you, Bella.”

My stomach filled with butterflies at his tone. He was being so reserved and shy. I nodded, finding myself unable to speak.

He gently took my hand in his as - from somewhere - a song started playing. It was my favorite song by Michael Buble - Sway, only very slow. He pulled me to a standing position and moved us away from the pillows as he started swaying us to the music. His hands rested on my hips as mine wrapped around his neck, my fingers lightly dancing in his hair as he held me close and danced with me.

The song continued softly in the background as Edward spoke, his voice deep and husky, full of love. “You are my dream come true. I had always hated this existence but with you by my side, I hope and pray that I’ll live to be thousands of thousands of years old. I never want us to end. When I first laid eyes on you, I knew that you were the only one for me. You’ve given me hope and love, you’ve breathed life back into me.” His words were earnestly whispered, his eyes intent on mine, glowing that beautiful swirling ocher. “You’re the strongest person I know and you make me want to be that strong, that willful.”

Here, Edward paused and swallowed roughly. He unwrapped me from him and slowly knelt down onto one of the pillows as the song continued all around us. “Those are only a few of the reasons I want to ask you…” Swallowing hard again, he looked deep into my soul. “Isabella Marie Swan, will you please spend the rest of your existence loving me? Will you marry me?” Unfolding one hand, he held a small solitary diamond ring in the center of his palm, the platinum band glinting softly in the twinkling lights.

A sob inadvertently tore from my lips and my eyes swam with my tears, my heart filled to bursting. My throat was closed from the lump residing in it and I had to swallow but before Edward could get the wrong idea, I squeezed his hands with mine and closed my eyes, willing him to give me another moment. Inhaling a long breath through my nose, I let my eyes flutter open on the exhale. Meeting his wide eyed gaze, our hands gripped together as Michael Buble’s words became softer than a whisper and the song faded to a close, I leaned down and pressed a dry kiss to my mate’s nose.

Staring directly into his eyes with my tear-filled ones, I whispered the only word I could. “Yes!”

His eyes lit up and a laugh fell from my mouth as he startled, standing abruptly and pulling me into him before lifting me high above his head, his mouth open as a happy laugh erupted from his chest. “Yes!? Yes! She said yes!” He shouted as I nodded, my smile so wide I thought my teeth would fall from my face. Edward spun me around and around, his exuberance making him so much more endearing to me. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and pulled myself close to him, even as he held me away from him, still twirling me around, and I pressed my lips to his laughing ones.

Finally pulling my body flush against his, he stopped his swirling and hugged me tight as our lips danced together, soft moans and gasps filling the area.


	11. Coming Together

**Epilogue**

“More! Please more!” I gasped as Edward’s magical fingers dug into the skin of my hips. His body undulated in tandem with my own as he filled me over and over. I loved the feel of his skin on mine, sending electrical pulses through my body. His fingers danced over my chest and torso, pinching my nipple lightly as he ventured further down before swirling his fingers around my throbbing clit. I arched into him with a throaty moan.

He grunted as his lips found mine, his hips pushing into me harder as he found his climax, filling me with his cool seed. I cried loudly as my own orgasm washed over me, my hands gripping his shoulders and hair.

We lay panting unneeded breath, still connected as our hands wandered over our bodies, pressing kisses randomly to exposed skin.

“I love you, Edward.” I told him as I pressed a kiss to his chest over his still heart.

He pulled me against him and kissed my temple. “I love you too, Bella.”

It’s January and it’s been two months since Edward sliced my neck open with his sharp incisors and changed me into a vampire. My mahogany hair was longer and fuller than ever before, my skin impenetrable and my body stronger than anything else on earth...Well, aside from other vampires and shape shifters.

During the change, the oddest thing happened. My mother appeared to me and suddenly, the flames that flew through my veins cooled to almost an icy liquid. She held my hand as her hazel eyes gazed at me lovingly as a white glow surrounded us. She stood near Phil who held an equally loving expression as he kept his eyes on his wife.

“We’re okay, sweet girl. We’re so proud of you.” Her voice was a heavenly echo as it traversed the air between us. I stared at her in wonder, unable to move. “You will have such a loving family and such good friends your entire existence. I’m so happy I’ve gotten to witness your transformation from scared to strong. I knew you had it in you.” She murmured. “I wish I could’ve protected you. I’m so sorry.”

I wish I could’ve told her she needn’t be sorry but I couldn’t move my lips. None of it was her fault. Her soft warm hand stroked over my forehead, smoothing my hair back. The burn of the change didn’t hurt me again, for she kept one hand in mine and cooed to me, telling me everything she was proud of me for.

“You ready, love?” Edward brought me out of my thoughts as he sat next to me atop a large redwood tree by the Calawah River. The air was chilly but it didn't matter to my skin anymore. Even in the throes of winter, I could be outside in a tee and jeans, shoeless, sitting in a tree and feel completely at ease. The evergreens were as brilliant as ever even as the oaks and elms were bare. Ferns had died off and the berries on the puckerberry bushes were no more, readying themselves for a new year. We had the entire house closed up and ready to go. We were moving to The Forks, Maine today but before we left, we had a date with the Quileute wolf pack.

A mischievous smile crossed my face. “I was born ready.”

We leapt off of the tree together, flying through the air like birds before my feet grazed the ground and we were off running through the forest. This was the last hunt with the wolves until I returned to visit.

Paul’s sleek silver wolf bounded next to me, his speed amazing as he kept up with my newborn speed. I reached my hand out and grabbed a handful of his silky fur as we darted over rocks and fallen trees, stirring up the bracken and little bit of snow that had fallen. Our friendship had only gotten stronger since my birthday party. He was there to help me through my first week as a vampire, snapping his jaws at me in warning before licking my face in reward when I accomplished something correctly. Edward laughed when Paul nipped at my ankles, trying to trip me up. I shoved him aside and raced ahead. Even Edward’s super speed, the fastest man in the coven, couldn’t help him keep up with me. As the boys started gaining speed - for I had slowed looking for my next meal - I threw out my shield, tripping them both up and giggling a bell like laugh as they both face planted in the snow coated leaf-litter.

It turns out I was a physical and mental shield. The Creutzfeldt-Jakob Disease had been interfering with my shield as a human...So Carlisle thinks anyway. With how quickly I was able to maneuver it and send it out around me, the doctor is adament that it would have been active even as a human but the disease in my body and brain was hindering its progress. Having this gift was one of the highlights of becoming an immortal with my mate. No one could or would ever hurt us again. I was no longer the fragile little human, taking the torture of my tormentors, unable to help even myself. Now I could keep any danger at bay. Jasper and Peter want me to learn how to fight, Southern Vampire Armies style. Edward was skeptical but I wasn't backing down. If for some reason my shield ever went kaput on me, I would prefer to know how to protect myself. I refused to back down and be the puny, defenseless little lamb.

I spotted an elk in the distance and growled low in my throat, my long hair loose and flying straight out behind me. It grazed on the bark of a poplar tree, trying to get as many nutrients as possible to sustain itself through the winter, though unbeknownst to him, it was pointless. I leapt onto the animal’s back and tore through the thick sinew on it’s neck. Paul slid to a stop next to me and I continued growling as the warm, soothing liquid ran down my throat. I heard Edward down his own meal with Quil a few yards away and Jake helping Emmett even further than that. Everyone was having a great time. The wolves devoured what was left of our carcasses when we finished drinking and then we all lazed about in the fading light.

I sighed as I leaned my head against the stomach of my wolf. I petted the fur of his neck, relishing in the silky softness, purring in time with his own rumblings. He laid his large snout on my chest and I hugged him to me.

Jake had always been my best friend but the connection I felt with Paul was even stronger than that. I still didn’t understand it but I just knew we were meant to be close. He lifted his smokey eyes to my orange-reddish ones and licked my face. I giggled and wiped his wolf slobber off of me as Edward came to us and sat behind me, his hand rubbing down my spine. Paul huffed, seemingly annoyed and rolled those large eyes at him before he nudged my arm with his cold wet nose.

“I’ll miss you, Paul.” I whispered as I laid my head against his chest again. He rumbled in his chest.

“He says he’ll miss you too.” Edward said slowly. I lifted my head to look from one to the other. Paul looked increasingly annoyed and I caught the imperceptible movement of Edward shaking his head. “Not now.”

I wondered if he was talking to Paul or to myself. “Both.” He answered shortly.

I nodded, letting it be for now and went back to petting my wolf. “You find yourself someone to love, ‘kay? Promise me.” I told him. Another growl tumbled around in his large barrel chest and I soothed his gripings with a cool hand over the coarse fur of his back.

Jake trotted up and whined. I got up after petting Paul’s head one last time and hugged my large russet friend. Quil and Embry joined us as well as the rest of the pack. I hugged every one of them, venomous tears in my eyes that would never fall again.

“I promise I’ll be back soon, okay?” We would be too. Charlie had made me promise to come back for Christmas and that was only eleven months away - a veritable wink in an immortal's existence, I was told. We had said our goodbyes to Charlie and Billy the night before over the phone. I couldn’t be around them yet but Carlisle promised that I would be strong enough to control myself by the time Christmas rolled around. "And don't you forget to email and phone me, okay? I need to hear from all of you." I told Paul. The rumble in his chest got louder as he lifted his head and nodded. He stuck his tongue out of his muzzle and gave a tiny lick to my cheek. I pressed a kiss to his snout and then between his eyes as he stood.

"I love you all." I whispered softly as they all lifted themselves up and stretched their wolfy legs in front of them.

As the wolf pack headed out of view, back toward the reservation, Edward grabbed my hand and we flew back to the mansion so we could jump in our vehicles and start the long drive from one end of Washington to the other end of Maine. I settled myself into my Ram and lovingly stroked the dash, eyeing the wooden feather and silver painted wolf that hung from the rearview mirror - my going away gift from Paul. Keying the ignition, I let the truck idle as the rest of the family - Peter included - backed around and headed down the long driveway. The moving trucks had already left this morning though Rosalie was sure we’d pass them on the interstate on the way up. My fingers went to the chain around my neck with the Cullen Crest hanging delicately from it. The gift from Carlisle for my birthday.

He was very nervous, thinking I wouldn’t accept his token since he didn’t want me to think he was taking Charlie’s place. It was fuzzy, being a human memory, but I remembered fondly how I ran up to him clumsily and hugged him with all my tiny strength. He had been taken aback but the smile on his face lit the room as his arms came around my back and held me close. I already had Charlie and Billy but I knew I had plenty of love in my heart for another father figure.

A honk brought me out of my thoughts and Edward gave me his crooked smile from his Volvo. I waved and smiled back, loving the flip my stomach did, putting the truck into drive and gunning it down the driveway, away from Forks and onward to my new life.

A life free of torment and torture.


	12. Letting Her Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a Mute is Moot O/S in Paul’s POV. RATED M FOR MATURE. Be Advised.
> 
> Why was Edward so lenient with Paul even as he was consumed with jealousy?

The first time I laid eyes on that leech lover, I was completely disgusted. What was she even doing on the reservation? She didn’t belong here. She belonged in the den of the dead. I refused to look at her for long, completely ill at ease with her very presence. Jake kept her snuggled up to him most of the time and every time I heard her laugh, I had to fight with my wolf not to look in her direction. He wanted to run to her and throw her to the ground, lavishing that creamy, silky looking skin with his nose and tongue.

That pissed me off more. The spirit animal inside me was fighting against me over some filthy little girl who liked to fuck a popsicle. Jake got angry with the pale face for some stupid reason and stomped off at one point. He was going to phase tonight, I just knew it. I caught Sam's eye before we both watched him stomp away, his body trembling. If he didn't phase, then he was better at controlling his emotions than most. Being the rightful alpha that wouldn't surprise me any. I tried to stay out of it. Let the leech lover just disappear back to the mansion where her undead creep lived. Unfortunately, hearing the way her breath hitched like she was going to cry and watching her scramble to her feet seemed to twist at my heart. She tripped over her own foot on the blanket she’d been sitting on and started going down face first, her hands gripping her dress to keep it from flipping up.

I was on her in a flash, catching her by the upper arm just before her little nose planted into the rocky beach. Her head whipped around and her eyes met mine. My grip tightened as all the negativity about this little filly went right out the window. I felt like a twat for even thinking those awful things about her. I warred with my heart and my brain for a split second as Bella found her footing. My breath left me in a whoosh as I righted her. I couldn’t help the animosity of the situation though so I growled at her to be careful before letting her go and stomping away. I would not fall right into her lap like some starving puppy.

I kept to myself for two days before Sam finally demanded what was wrong with me. I had been a complete asshole to everyone the night of the bonfire so no one bothered me at my little empty shack until Sam barged in through the front door and ordered me to breakfast the next day.

"It's time you lean on your pack, Paul. Depend on us." He looked so sincere after being a big douche that I couldn't stay mad at him. He was right, after all. I needed the support of my pack for something like this. I stomped up the old wooden steps into Leah and Sam’s house. Leah had just set the table for the pack - a huge buffet of breakfast foods - when Sam looked up from his newspaper, his face reflecting his shock. The rest of the pack was already there, gathered around the large oak table as Leah set out plates.

“You actually listened to me, Lahote?” He demanded as he set the paper aside and kissed Leah’s arm as she placed a plate loaded with food in front of him.

I sat down and ran a hand through my hair as Leah set me a plate. I murmured a quick thanks and took a huge forkful of browned potatoes, sticking it in my mouth. "You fucking ordered me to." Chewing obnoxiously, I grumbled. “I fucking imprinted on the leech lover.”

The pain that sliced through my chest at that statement had me inhaling sharply and I started choking on the food. Quil stood up and started pounding on my back as I coughed and sputtered. They all stared at me dumbfounded as I regained my breath and gulped down a large glass of OJ.

“Seriously?” Jake asked in a weak voice. “What the hell does that mean?” He was her best friend and only wanted the best for her. This would be something big for him to wrap his head around. She would be better off with the pack than she would be that ice cold dicksicle.

Everyone started talking and yelling all at once before I shut them all down with a heavy fist on the table top. “Shut up! It means nothing. I don’t need to accept it and she doesn’t need to know. Period. End of fucking story.” I tried like hell to ignore the burning pain at that statement.

O--O

I was patrolling with Embry and Quil when the latter decided to open his mind and spew some bullshit rumors about my imprint. I watched as his thoughts reflected what he'd gleaned from our alpha earlier. Sam and Leah had gone to Billy’s the other day and had a long sit down with Charlie and the Chief about Bella. Christ, the pain that seared through my soul when I found out she was dying nearly put me on my muzzle. Quil’s chocolate brown wolf trotted up to me, tilting his head back and forth as he stared at me for long moments. My paws were seemingly glued to the forest bracken.

_Guess it’s not the end of the fucking story, is it Paul?_ He thought to me.

I couldn’t even answer him. The possibilities flew through my mind at how I could be apart of her life if only for a little while until finally, Embry’s thoughts broke through.

_She’s going to be a leech. She will die, but she’ll be born again._

_What the fuck!? How was that going to help me? Don’t wolves die when their imprints die?_ I had to get out of there and go see Old Quil.

_Good luck!_ I heard the twosome shout in their minds to me as I booked it as fast as my silver legs would carry me toward the shaman’s rickety old home. If anyone could help me sort this mess out, it'd be him. The crazy old coot knew shit that no one else did.

I phased in his treeline and yanked the dirty brown cutoffs from the leather throng on my ankle, pulling them roughly up my legs as I walked briskly toward the back door of the faded blue house. The shingles were falling off in places, the blue siding was worn and chipped, the back porch was lopsided from age and rot. Old Quil met me at the door and opened it with a grim look on his weathered face. His hair was a long shock of white and hung limply in two thin braids on either side of his shoulders. He had a large white and gray feather strung into the left braid and kept a thick braided rawhide necklace around his neck that was decorated with beads and colored thread.

That’s a promising look right there, I'll tell ya. His lips were pulled down harshly as he stared at me with his dark beady little eyes.

He directed me to sit on his tan and brown flowered suede couch. The springs dug into my ass but I didn’t complain as the old shaman set a ceramic teacup in front of me. It smelled sharply of mint and sage.

“Drink that.” The old man demanded in a raspy voice as his gnarled hands grasped his own cup and sipped. I did as he asked and no sooner was the last of the scalding liquid burning my stomach lining, my eyes blurred in and out of focus.

The old man poisoned me. I just knew it.

_Shut up, you fool. I didn’t poison you._

I opened my eyes, not realizing I’d shut them in the first place, when I heard Old Quil’s voice echoing in my head as if he were apart of the pack mind. I wasn’t sitting in the old man’s home anymore on his dilapidated couch. I was sitting with my legs crossed in the middle of a meadow deep in the La Push wilderness. I recognized the area, having patrolled it many times. He took my hand as he appeared suddenly like an apparition and we walked sedately through the forest. He guided me through my life, step by step, shocking me with more information than my brain seemed to want to grasp onto.

When I left Old Quil’s place after our little drug induced spirit walk, I felt lighter. I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with this yet emotionally, but I knew physically that I would be okay.

Walking into Billy’s, I realized there was already a pack meeting going on of sorts, only Chief Swan was present. My mind immediately went to Bella. Who was with her, was she safe? Seeing the look on my face, Charlie patted the seat on the old plaid couch next to him and I plopped down roughly, dragging a hand through my hair.

“She’s going to have to become a vampire.” I murmured quietly to the room before heaving a sigh, trying desperately to dispel the tension in my chest.

“Yeah.” Sam agreed as he grabbed his imprint’s hand and kissed her palm. Leah leaned into him with tears in her eyes.

“She thought I pitied her.” She whispered. “She’s been through so much and she’s still the strongest person I know.”

I nodded, having seen snippets of Bella since the night I imprinted on her, despite how much I didn’t want to be apart of her life, I knew I had to do something. Old Quil’s spirit walk really cleared up a lot for me.

I decided I better tell the guys...as much as I didn’t want to. “So the bat shit crazy shaman drugged me and made me take a walk with him in my dreams.” Charlie choked on a swig of his beer and Billy clapped him on the back. I kept my eyes down and my voice low. “Bella’s my imprint but she will never be my mate. More like a best friend or sister. God, I wish that wasn’t the case but I’ve gotta deal with it. Apparently…” I paused and looked at Jacob then Billy, trying my best to look apologetic. “Apparently, Rachel has been in love with me for years and she and I will marry. Somehow, Bella’s soul doesn’t leave her when she turns so I won’t die when she does. If I see her every now and then, I’ll be able to live a normal life.” I snorted then.

Normal my aunt Fanny.

“Rachel? She’s coming home?” Billy asked in a strained whisper. I nodded. It's always been hard on Billy and Jake since Rachel and Rebecca selfishly pulled up roots and took off as soon as they could. I never particularly liked the twins at all but supposedly spirit walks didn't lie.

“I don’t know when, but when she does she won’t want to leave me, thus starting the future.” My voice sounded defeated even to my own ears.

Jake slammed his fist on the coffee table. “Sure, she won’t come home for me and Dad but she’ll stay for you? This is bullshit.” He growled, his body vibrating.

“Yeah, it’s true. Sorry man.” I shrugged.

“Not your fault.” He grumbled as his shaking subsided after Sam clamped a hand on his shoulder.

We continued discussing the dilemma and decided that a talk with the Cullens was in order. We met up with them and they let us know that they already invited Bella to be apart of their undead army. With that resolved, we headed toward our homes but as just as I was about to phase human, Jake invited me to Bella’s in the morning. I agreed. I wanted to be able to get as much time with her as possible. I had no idea when she was going to turn into a vampire so I wanted to be able to get to know her some.

O--O

Good God, what that woman did to me. She always dressed in the sexiest vintage outfits, her hair was always done up so adorable. I longed to wrap the silky strands around my fist and devour her whole body with my mouth. She kept me at a respectable arms length and though sometimes I pushed the boundaries, I never pushed her far. I’d heard what she’d been through and Jesus Christ, she deserved the world. The poor girl was a fighter, that was for sure. It was hard to think of her as a sister. There was just no possible way. She was sex on a stick and I'd rather claim her as a best friend.

I loved toying with her popsicle’s mind though. The mind fucker was so easy to rile up. Yes, Bella was fuckhot and I wanted her tiny little body wrapped around me but I knew it was a lost cause. Didn’t mean I couldn’t fuck with the corpse though. He hated when I would imagine her completely naked, her perky little tits bouncing in time with the rhythm of our fucking. I had heard her moaning once when Edward kissed her and so I replayed that noise for myself over and over while I jacked off. Her vampire hated when I would picture that again and again. Never failed, he would always meet me at the treaty line and we would wrestle until someone got hurt. Usually he did, though he refused to admit defeat.

I admired the light pink scars on my side daily, as a reminder that even though he gets the girl, I get to keep my dreams. He can’t take my thoughts away from me. Maybe I was being a little fuck about it but hell, he gets my imprint so fuck it. I didn’t care.

It was a sworn secret not to tell Bella about the imprint. She could find out later, after she was cured of the disease running through her body, but not before. No one wanted to jeopardize her health and we all assumed she would put off the change if she found out. Hell, no one even mentioned the word imprint around her.

O--O

The next thing I knew, it was her birthday party and tonight she would start the change. Carlisle would hover over Eddie while he bit into the skin of my imprint’s neck. The thought killed me inside. I put on a good front though, laughing it up and keeping her birthday merry. She deserved the world. I wasn't going to be allowed to attend the so called funeral. There was no way I would be able to keep my wolf at bay, watching as a _cold one_ sunk it's fangs into Bella.

Unfortunately, as the evening wore on, I couldn’t keep my heart in my chest and it crawled its way onto my sleeve. When it was my turn to say goodbye, I begged the popsicle to let me have a few minutes with her alone.

_I swear, no funny business Edward. Please._

Fuck, even I could hear the whine in my inner voice. I scoffed at myself inwardly as he nodded his head and backed up. Bella looked so adorably confused until the tears formed in my eyes. I felt like a schmuck but I couldn’t stop them from falling, hard as I tried. I wrapped her in my arms and held her for as long as I could, wishing things were different. I held her as she shed a few tears with me, I held her until I heard Edward shift on his feet. I held her hand until I couldn’t stand it any longer. I needed to get out of there so I could break down without her seeing or hearing me. So without another word, I released her hand and ran away, my heart breaking with every step away from her.

Why couldn’t she stay alive? Why couldn’t she _not_ have this disease? Why would the spirits give me an imprint that was destined to be apart of the undead?

Because life was unfair, that’s why. Bella’s entire life was completely unfair and now mine was too. Sure, I would end up living a happy enough life, but I would never get to make love to the woman.

To my imprint.

To the first woman I’d ever loved.

And I was sure, the _only_ woman I’d ever love.


End file.
